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bloodonsnow's review
1.0
The idea that harmful experiences as a child can inhibit someone as an adult is nothing new, nor is the idea that it can exacerbate illness. (Felitti et. al's study "Relationship of Childhood Abuse and Household Dysfunction to Many of the Leading Causes of Death in Adults: The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study" is hallmark and fantastic in examining some of the ways childhood harm perpetuates through adulthood. It doesn't just talk about abusive childhoods and addresses trauma from poverty, racism, and external trauma such as death of a loved one.) However, some of the language in this book makes it seem that if people knew about their childhood issues and just tried a little harder, they wouldn't have physical ailments. "But why did he have asthma? He suffered his first severe attack when he was nine. What drove him into this disease? Did he not have a loving mother? Was he able to sense that love, or was he assailed by doubts?" (p. 68). ... um. Maybe he just had asthma. Could it have been made worse by stress? Sure. Was it caused by his mother? Doubtful. Does that sound blamey? It sure as fuck does. The idea that physical and mental ailments will just go away if we resolve issues in our childhood is dangerous on the medical front and the psychological front; we need to treat the body, but also not guilt trip the mind.
It also got a lot self-indulgent at the end with her talking about her own patients. The manner in which she did so made me cringe.
It was an interesting concept that went too far into blame territory for my liking. Do I think that harmful parenting can hurt you later in life? I do! Do I think it's the reason you've got allergies? Nah. And don't go blaming yourself if you do have allergies. Get some Allegra or whatnot and have a cup of tea.
It also got a lot self-indulgent at the end with her talking about her own patients. The manner in which she did so made me cringe.
It was an interesting concept that went too far into blame territory for my liking. Do I think that harmful parenting can hurt you later in life? I do! Do I think it's the reason you've got allergies? Nah. And don't go blaming yourself if you do have allergies. Get some Allegra or whatnot and have a cup of tea.
vinjii's review
4.0
A very interesting read about how child abuse of any form is stored within the body and either results in the child becoming an abusive adult or an adult suffering from various mental and health problems. Because society teaches us to love our parents (the 4th commandment) we are unable to express our hate, hurt or whatever negative emotion we have towards our parents and end up suffering or letting others suffer. Whilst I don't agree with everything she says I think it will show the reader a few situations that will enable them to understand themselves and the relationship they have with their parents a bit better.
meddy's review against another edition
5.0
Forse uno dei migliori libri della Miller.
Un saggio relativamente breve che consiglio a chiunque voglia cominciare (o proseguire) ad addentrarsi nel mondo della consapevolezza di se stesso, del proprio corpo, del proprio passato, delle proprie ferite.
I temi toccati sono tutt'altro che semplici o innocui, ma credo che ognuno debba darsi la possibilità di andare oltre alle proprie paure - per altro legate ai traumi infantili - e scoprire l'origine delle proprie ferite, giungendo o mirando, infine, alla guarigione.
Naturalmente non abbiate fretta, l'approccio a questi libri dovrebbe essere quello di estrema calma, pazienza e comprensione per se stessi.
Si risveglieranno fantasmi con molto da raccontare, e le pause non saranno un ostacolo, anzi, saranno più che necessarie per prestare loro ascolto.
Un saggio relativamente breve che consiglio a chiunque voglia cominciare (o proseguire) ad addentrarsi nel mondo della consapevolezza di se stesso, del proprio corpo, del proprio passato, delle proprie ferite.
I temi toccati sono tutt'altro che semplici o innocui, ma credo che ognuno debba darsi la possibilità di andare oltre alle proprie paure - per altro legate ai traumi infantili - e scoprire l'origine delle proprie ferite, giungendo o mirando, infine, alla guarigione.
Naturalmente non abbiate fretta, l'approccio a questi libri dovrebbe essere quello di estrema calma, pazienza e comprensione per se stessi.
Si risveglieranno fantasmi con molto da raccontare, e le pause non saranno un ostacolo, anzi, saranno più che necessarie per prestare loro ascolto.