Reviews with content warning for Toxic relationship - Kutsu minua nimelläsi

I loved the writing style of this book - I would describe it as eloquent, overwritten, unreliable narrator vibes. The main characters are both terribly flawed and are destined to lose each other and yet there is so much in the story about relationships, self-discovery, the passage of time, memories, families, etc.
This is not a sweet love story, and I don't think it is trying to be one either. I would definitely recommend looking at content warnings before reading this book.

Content Warnings

librarymouse's review against another edition

Go to review page

emotional reflective slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

Call Me By Your Name really reminds me of Bernhard Schlink's The Reader, and despite its literary merit, I am similarly unsure that I enjoyed reading the novel. The writing is beautiful in some parts, but Elio's unhinged obsession and Oliver's acquiescence to the sexual advances of a minor are both cause for concern and not particularly enjoyable to read. Elio is damaged from the experience, unable to let his history with Olive go in order to form new and lasting bonds in adulthood, in a way that Oliver is not. The power imbalance in this novel is stark. Call Me By Your Name is considered a romance, but I don't see it as such. It's about obsession, miscommunication, and social expectations. There are also an egregious number of scenes that focus on feet.

Content Warnings

natraf_reads's review against another edition

Go to review page

emotional reflective sad slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

3.0

have a lot of mixed feelings about this -

The first being the prose was beautifully written. It felt like poetry the way descriptions flowed off the page. However, I felt that this thought stream coming from a 17 year old boy was incredibly unrealistic.

17 year old Ellio, finds himself magnetically drawn to 24 year old Oliver, a postdoctoral student studying abroad and staying with Ellio’s family. What starts as a fascination becomes more of an obsession. Every waking thought Ellio has is of Oliver.

Having a young person interested in an older, seemingly cooler, more put together person seems normal. But Ellio’s thoughts become focused on fantasies he has had about he and Oliver’s pairing. There is a lot of sexual content that seems very one sided. These are Ellio’s thoughts and fantasies. It’s not until over halfway through the book we see Oliver reciprocate any feelings or interest.

At which time there’s the pretty disturbing scene with Ellio and the peach that I’m just going to pretend I never read… but it’s fine.

Once joined, I feel that Oliver has continued to take advantage of Ellio and his obsession with Oliver.

We see once Oliver moves back home and comes back a few months later to visit, that he is engaged. He has a woman he’s been seeing the last few years, and pretty much just ends everything he and Ellio shared.

Years later, he still has pieces of memories they shared, Ellio who is still hoping for a chance to see his long lost love , knows he still wants more with Oliver, but can’t. Oliver even acknowledges that his eldest son is the same age as Ellio was when they met, and that he would never want that for him.

I thought the writing was beautiful. I felt that the emotions conveyed and the deep feelings Ellio held were beautiful - but kind of crossed into the territory of obsessive. I feel that Oliver took advantage of him. I feel that their whole relationship was unsafe.

It’s a hard balance between seeing the true romance this was intended as, and the twisted obsession it was.

Content Warnings

spectralspawn's review against another edition

Go to review page

challenging dark emotional sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

0.5

This book was a gross display of a predator using his power and influence over a teenager to completely twist and warp his mind. To the degree where he spends his entire life being in love and obsessed with this man. Meanwhile the predator had his fun with a child and then moved on with his life like he wasn't even a blip on it. Would not recommend reading unless you are someone who likes reading about that sort of thing... In that case... Have fun I guess

Content Warnings

bluestar_apologist's review against another edition

Go to review page

When I found out that the story was “romance” between a 17-year-old kid and a 24-year-old man, I stopped reading. The author could’ve easily made the character be older (18 or 19), but the creep of an author made the deliberate choice to make him younger.

Content Warnings

mels_reading_log's review against another edition

Go to review page

dark emotional reflective fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.5

When I watched this movie there were a lot of times when I felt I was missing something. Now that I have read the book I understand. This author writes in a poetic way, very descriptive and flowery language as he delves deep into feelings and memories. That is hard to express on film. This story is about a 17 year old and his affair with a visiting professor who is staying in his parents’ home in Italy for the summer. This relationship is problematic from an age perspective but also a maturity perspective. The teenager falls in love hard, in that completely obsessive way that teenagers love everything. And the older man takes advantage of that admiration.

Content Warnings

emotape's review against another edition

Go to review page

emotional reflective sad slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Content Warnings

amaralh's review against another edition

Go to review page

emotional reflective relaxing sad slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

Content Warnings

More...