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dinosher's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
This is how Vivek was born, after death and into grief.
Went into this book blind but came out with such a heavy heart, it broke me in more ways than one. It's incredible how the author managed to capture the essence of grief in such a tragic yet gentle way. I'm a very slow reader but with this book, I was just so eager to discover Vivek's story that the pages felt like they were just turning themselves. This book is about the death of Vivek Oji, it's about the life he has lead before, it's a story about Vivek Oji. At the same time, it's so much more than that, it's about all the people that love him in their own ways, it's about all the ways they tried to protect him, it's about who they thought he was.
How could he be gone when he'd overtaken us so completely while he was here?
The combined amount of chapters we get to venture inside Vivek's mind are limited. Instead, we get told who he is through the perspectives of other people. We slowly uncover the truth about the what happened on the day of his death while venturing deeper into all the moments before his death, we get to see all the memories that made Vivek.
They barely understood him themselves, but they loved him, and that had been enough.
All the characters felt like they were jumping off the pages, bursting with their own personalities and stories, you could tell that the author wrote them as individuals and not just side characters. I felt especially connected to the women in the story, they were not just wives, they were also mothers, sisters, daughters and survivors, every one of them were once bright young girls as well. The author really expresses how such a conservative community tears people apart from the inside out in the most brutal way, with beautiful prose.
I know what they say about men who allow other men to penetrate them. Ugly things; ugly words. Calling them women, as if that's supposed to be ugly too.
Vivek's story was just heartbreaking to read, how he must've suffered when he was forced to hide his true self in such a restrictive community, to hide his happiest side from his parents. The rage when Vivek's mother finally uncovered this side of her child, how was she supposed to deal with the knowledge of having to mourn someone who was so familiar yet so unrecognizable? The way acceptance of Vivek's death was found in in end was just gut wrenching. Vivek was truly loved, no matter who he was.
I want to thank him for loving me.
Graphic: Death, Homophobia, Incest, Misogyny, Transphobia, and Grief
Moderate: Domestic abuse and Violence
Minor: Miscarriage
nikitagupta98's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? N/A
3.75
Graphic: Incest, Misogyny, and Transphobia
michaelion's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Akwaeke Emezi, the person that you are. You've done it yet again. I can't wait to read all their books. They are truly amazing.
Graphic: Body horror, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Incest, Infidelity, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Blood, Grief, Religious bigotry, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Animal death, Biphobia, Deadnaming, Gore, Homophobia, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Transphobia, Violence, Death of parent, Lesbophobia, Outing, Gaslighting, Colonisation, and Dysphoria
Minor: Confinement, Hate crime, Miscarriage, Vomit, Murder, and Abandonment
victorsbookshelf's review against another edition
4.0
Graphic: Death, Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Misogyny, Sexual content, and Transphobia
filosophicfoton's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.5
Graphic: Deadnaming, Death, Incest, Transphobia, Grief, Outing, and Abandonment
Moderate: Hate crime, Homophobia, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Violence, Blood, Religious bigotry, and Lesbophobia
Minor: Domestic abuse, Infertility, Infidelity, and Injury/Injury detail
lazlio's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Graphic: Death, Homophobia, Incest, Infidelity, Misogyny, Sexual content, Transphobia, Lesbophobia, Outing, and Dysphoria
thepassivebookworm's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Deadnaming, Death, Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Incest, Infertility, Infidelity, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Transphobia, Blood, Grief, and Dysphoria
shoohoob's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
Graphic: Homophobia, Incest, Sexual content, and Transphobia
Moderate: Gun violence, Infidelity, Misogyny, Blood, Religious bigotry, Outing, and Injury/Injury detail
tinyjude's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
I wish that instead of seeing Vivek/Nnembi from everyone's points of view, we got more from her inner world and how she felt in those final months. Especially with all the gender fluidity and sexual identity that could have been explored through her lens. My biggest complain is the incest like WHAT THE FUCK? they could have been childhood friends and that would have made this so much more enjoyable, but making them cousins... I hated every second of it. Also, why is everyone fucking everyone without their partners' knowing? WHY ARE YOU CHEATING AND SAYING YOU LOVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND???? I DONT GET IT.
After so much transphobic comments from his parents, I am glad that his mom accepted him, even though it was too late and her reactions at first hurt so much to read.
The grandma was my favourite character. She rules even after death, she would have loved Vivek/Nnembi so much.
Graphic: Animal death, Deadnaming, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Incest, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Sexual content, Transphobia, Blood, Grief, Religious bigotry, and Dysphoria
the_abundant_word's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.0
Graphic: Death, Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Incest, Misogyny, and Transphobia
Moderate: Death, Infidelity, Sexism, Sexual content, Blood, Grief, and Death of parent
Minor: Infertility and Islamophobia