Reviews with content warning for Homophobia - The Grief Keeper

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The Grief Keeper by Alexandra Villasante

32 reviews

tayterchip's review against another edition

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challenging emotional funny hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

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mckeelyshannon's review against another edition

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challenging emotional hopeful medium-paced

One of my favorite lines from this book is “A heaviness sits under my skin, above my bones—an invisible, smothering blanket. Pavor, angustia, pánico, a collection of heavy, gut-churning feelings. I am drowning.”

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just_one_more_paige's review

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challenging emotional hopeful reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.0

In my (mostly failing but ever effortful) attempt to read the backlist books on my shelves at home between the myriad newer releases and library holds that just keep coming, I present this success! This was part of a used bookstore haul a while ago; the concept (which I feel like I have also read about in other books/shows as well, though none of them are coming to mind now) of transferring emotions from one person to another is one that I find really interesting, so I wanted to see this take on it.

This novel opens with Marisol and her younger sister, Gabi, having just arrived in the US hoping to achieve asylum after escaping from a dangerous situation, one that caused their brother's death, in El Salvador. When Marisol is presented with a "choice" that would make their case for asylum stronger, by participating in a trial for a new technology that would take someone else's grief into her own body, she agrees to it. It's a risk, but Marisol would do anything to protect her younger sister, especially since she feels like it's her fault Gabi was put in such a terrible situation to begin with. Life in America isn't quite like Marisol has seen in her favorite tv shows, but as she bonds with the person she's been paired with for the experiment (Ray) even past what the trial should include, and their feelings for each other grow, Marisol and Ray find that they might be able to help each other move past their griefs together.

I felt like this was a YA novel that read very young. Gabi specifically felt younger than twelve to me, though in fairness, the story was written from Marisol's POV, so that could be her voice projecting onto her "baby" sister. But overall, there was just a very naive vibe to the writing that felt a bit off, considering the life experiences of the sisters. By the end, the writing did morph into something that felt more age-appropriate, but having that transition over such a short time period then just seemed too fast. To clarify, it's not at all that the writing was bad, but just that my biggest "iffy" feeling over the entire reading experience was that the maturity of the writing seemed like it didn't match the character's ages/experiences, nor the tone of the book, until towards the end.

Other than that, this novel did a great job addressing some incredibly serious and intense YA topics with the sincerity and gravity they deserved, but with an understanding of the way they may be experienced differently for youth, as opposed to adults. Which, first off, let me say how frustrated (and by that, I mean truly *angry*) I was, reading about the ridiculous level of manipulation that Marisol (and Gabi) experienced at the hands of US officials. The way they made it seem like she had agency and was able to make a choice, whole in reality everyone knew there was no actual choice, had me hot. Especially because how is crossing the border underage (and knowing what happened to her brother!) not enough trauma to already have to disqualify Marisol from participating?! That aspect of manipulation continued as a theme throughout, even as we learn more about what Ray was told related to the experiment as well. I appreciated that examination of how easily, and in how many ways, this type of technology (even with best intentions) can be harmful and used inappropriately.

Obviously, based on the story itself, there was quite a bit of time devoted to exploring grief and trauma and the myriad ways people can experience and handle it. There were, on this note, quite a few really tough topics that were addressed throughout this novel including siblinghood and siblings as parents, coming of age and sexuality, homophobia (including both physically and psychologically violent ways), grief (and guilt over the lack of it), refugee/asylum seeking, and death (fairly traumatic, sibling deaths). While I felt that these were all addressed with accessibility for a YA audience, they were also addressed with straightforwardness and dimension, so please beware if any of this content could potentially be triggering for you to read. With all that in mind, the ending was perhaps a bit too “wrapped up in a bow,” emotionally, but it’s hard to not having been cheering for that kind of hopeful ending.

I loved the way that Marisol’s older sister perspective was written, as well as Gabi’s beginning-to-push-back younger sister characterization, that felt so accurate to me. And honestly the normality of that protectiveness/pushing boundaries that comes with youth and sibling interactions was a great “normal” background, bringing the more intense themes of loss and border-crossing and trauma into even sharper relief. I felt like the romance piece wasn’t super believable, not necessarily liked strained or trying too hard, but more like I never felt more than a friend vibe between Marisol and Ray. And really, I feel like their connection as friends could have played the same role in the story that the budding romance did. However, that being said, I did love the message that finding connection with others is critical for dealing with depression and grief. And I’m here for a sweet YA f/f love story situation.

This was a pretty fast read for me, interesting and well-paced. Although I feel like it was on the easier side for a YA read, writing-wise, the topics it addressed were clearly mature and handled well within the context of the story. Perhaps this isn’t a new all-time favorite read, but if it sounds at all like you’d be interested in it, I would definitely recommend picking it up.

“We believe in luck. The good kind and the cruel. The kind that graces and the kind that cripples. The kind that doesn’t care what you deserve.”

“People handle grief in different ways. It isn't the same for everyone. Some people can manage with help, and others lock themselves into grief. Still others become stronger by it. And it isn't only grief. It's trauma. [...] Victims of terrible assaults, soldiers who were damaged in body and in spirit. That's a kind of grief that is even more entrenched, when it is augmented by guilt and fear.”

“She’s been through the same thing that millions of other people have been through. What makes her pain more unbearable than anyone else’s?”

“But when you don’t have a good choice, you make a bad choice.”

“La Suerte isn’t only Mala. She is two-faced. How beautiful and balanced, how terrible and cruel La Suerte is.”

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lizzyc_16's review

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challenging emotional hopeful informative reflective sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

this book was so fricking good. i'll write an organized review later...

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ziareads's review

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adventurous hopeful sad tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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kathsaph's review

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challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.75

"The Grief Keeper" is the story of Marisol, a seventeen-year-old girl, who flees El Salvador with her little sister under threat of death. Once in America Marisol is offered the chance to win asylum by participating in an experiment; taking another person's grief. What she does not expect is falling in love with the girl she is saving.

This novel was personally difficult to read, but completely relevant and impactful. So many details were packed into 300 pages, all contributing to amazing character development and storytelling. The book is in the first person and often includes Spanish, I ended up looking up the words as I went along, and I recommend doing the same, it added another layer of depth. My response to "The Grief Keeper" was visceral, and although not all of the technology in the book exists, the societal views that would allow the experiment to happen do, making the book terrifying. Please check triggers before reading.

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lowsmee's review

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dark emotional sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes

3.0

The highlight of this book is the relationship between Marisol and Gabi. The ending was a huge miss for me.

The sisterly love could not balance out the coercion, torture, emotional manipulation that came after it. I loved so much about the book but I couldn’t get past these 4 things.

1. I’m disgusted by the fact that Marisol gets taken in by the same people who were willing to sacrafice her to preserve their own family.

2. Her relationship with Rey has it’s moments but they are overshadowed by Rey’s willfull ignorance around how the cuffs work. I don’t buy that she just didn’t notice how Marisol was getting worse at the same rate that she was getting better.

3. I don’t think the author fully addresses why transferring grief and trauma from one person to another is a bad idea. There was an opportunity to highlight the importance of our interpersonal relationships in processing grief but she only hints at it.

4. Indranie uses her identity as a justification for kidnapping and abuse and it works.

The non YA sequel should be focused on Marisol processing the fact that she survived her own very special version of Get Out, and allow her to be angry at the people who decided she wasn’t anything more than a receptical for their fragile, white daughter’s grief.

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utopiastateofmind's review

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Diverse cast of characters? Yes

4.0

My first favorite element of The Griefkeeper has to be the way it centers around the medical exploitation of the marginalized. The way Marisol is chosen outside of the legal processes because of how desperate she is to stay in the US. To escape the gang violence which killed her brother. And Villasante never lets us forget it as Marisol is left with many other options and must rely on their good graces. But what quickly became my favorite element is how The Griefkeeper navigates grief and loss.

How it asks us what value we see in our grief. Because to most of the adults in The Griefkeeper, grief is seen as a negative emotion - something to remove. And The Griefkeeper explores this idea of the importance of grief. Not only that, but also in its opposites, it examines the process of healing. Additionally it clearly examines the idea of 'necessary sacrifices' and what we will do for our own benefit.

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steviaplath's review

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challenging emotional hopeful inspiring lighthearted sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Content Warnings

lilcoppertop's review against another edition

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dark emotional funny hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.0

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