Reviews tagging 'Grief'

A Menina da Montanha by Tara Westover

103 reviews

becandthebooks's review against another edition

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5.0

“My life was narrated for me by others. Their voices were forceful, emphatic, absolute. It had never occurred to me that my voice might be as strong as theirs.”

I think this is one of the best books I've ever read! Not just memoirs and non-fiction, but out of any genre.

Educated is a vast array of emotions. It's fascinating, sad, hopeful, confronting, inspiring, unbelievable, addictive and educational. Tara is truly a force to be reckoned with. The bravery she shows by writing and publishing a book like this would have be been very difficult emotionally for her, but I also imagine very healing as well. She has run the risk of shutting herself off from her family forever, but in gaining her education she has learnt how important it is to record and understand history, and that is exactly why she has shared her story.

I honestly wish Tara the absolute best, she has been through so much and deserves peace.

“The decisions I made after that moment were not the ones she would have made. They were the choices of a changed person, a new self.
You could call this selfhood many things. Transformation. Metamorphosis. Falsity. Betrayal.
I call it an education.”
 

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jsanders05's review against another edition

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3.5

I still don’t understand the whole ‘point’ of this novel. Was it to inform people that they can change their lives for the better? Was it to make us feel bad for the author? Was it to enlighten people about the crazy Idahoan Mormans? I’m left a tad confused.  

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katlinstirling_reads's review against another edition

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4.0

Educated by Tara Westover is a well-written,thought-provoking, fascinating and a powerful memoir. Overcoming and breaking free from her survivalist Mormon family  in order to go to college. This is Tara’s reminder to everything that education extends beyond the walls of the community and encompasses our everyday experiences and to question our ingrained beliefs. Emotional, heartbreaking yet utterly moving and deeply inspiring. I applaud Tara for her honesty and resilience. 

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miggyfool's review against another edition

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5.0


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mvr's review against another edition

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5.0


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emmasmidnightlibrary's review against another edition

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challenging dark sad tense slow-paced

2.0


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krhe's review against another edition

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challenging dark slow-paced

2.75

Qué dolor y qué denso de leer. Una mierda de experiencia pero la forma de escribir pues pffff. 

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izzyclemente's review against another edition

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5.0


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vgartner's review against another edition

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5.0


I started listening to the audiobook knowing that the author was Mormon and didn't receive a formal education until some later point in her life, but not really knowing much else about her story. Most of what I know about Mormonism comes from pop culture (The Book of Mormon, the drama Under the Banner of Heaven, etc.), and while this book is very much about a Mormon family, I wouldn't say I learned a much more about mainstream Mormonism from this memoir.

What Tara Westover centers in her writing is her childhood and adolescent experiences of physical and emotional abuse and her subsequent struggle to become herself and find an understanding of those experiences as part of her history but not the measure of her worth as a person. It's a story of survival and overcoming the deeply ingrained self-betrayal hammered into her via her abusive family members.

Many of her realizations and reflections on her experiences were familiar to me in my own path towards healing similar emotional wounds, but one passage in particular stopped me in my tracks with its clarity of insight:

"'I’m only crying from the pain', I told myself. 'From the pain in my wrist. Not from anything else'.
This moment would define my memory of that night, and of the many nights like it, for a decade. In it I saw myself as unbreakable, as tender as stone. At first I merely believed this, until one day it became the truth. Then I was able to tell myself, without lying, that it didn’t affect me, that he didn’t affect me, because nothing affected me. I didn’t understand how morbidly right I was. How I had hollowed myself out. For all my obsessing over the consequences of that night, I had misunderstood the vital truth: that its not affecting me, that was its effect."


Westover excels at not only describing her experiences with vivid detail and raw emotional honesty, but in identifying how each experience contributed to the story of her life - what decisions she made (which decisions she felt she was able to make); how she tried so hard to exist according to the limits and expectations put to her; how, ultimately, she realized she could no longer continue to obey her family's twisted rules without losing herself totally; the utter devastation she felt in trying to choose herself over her abusers.

One theme that reappears throughout is her father's and brother's use of misogyny to belittle and control her, which, through the course of the book, she slowly begins to understand is just another way they can maker her feel worthless. What I find really interesting is the chapter when she is at BYU and discussing polygamy with a classmate, and how she feels so devalued by that part of her religion, and when prompted by her classmate, refuses at first to acquiesce to her classmates expectation that she simply "pray for faith" for her lack of understanding. She comes so close to explicitly connecting the misogyny employed by her male family members as a more general tool of subjugation of women sanctified by her church's teachings, but never goes there.

Throughout, Westover mostly avoids discussing her personal feelings about Mormonism directly beyond this scene and later, during her PhD, how her chapter on Mormonism was her favorite to write (though maybe this is not fair of me, as I consider her love of Mormon choir music as a more general human experience than specifically part of her faith, which maybe others would disagree with me about). My impression from what little she says and what all she does not say is that she never left her Mormon faith behind when she sought out a path independent from her family, and maybe is unwilling to open that part of her life to public knowledge and discussion. Part of me feels greedy in wanting to know more about how her beliefs changed during her time living as her own person. And possibly she simply decided that was too big a topic for the story she wanted to tell here. But I was left wanting just a bit more on this subject, although overall I wouldn't say the book felt incomplete at all! 

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ksilvio's review against another edition

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4.25


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