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rainbowbookworm's review
5.0
Lamya’s journey also includes leaving her home for a country that is less accepting of her identity, a country where she never truly feels welcomed. She’s constantly aware of how much the world marginalizes people based on their race, gender, sexuality, and religion. Moving to the U.S. doesn’t provide relief—it only brings new challenges like Islamophobia, religious profiling, and a relentless barrage of microaggressions. Lamya doesn’t hold back, showing how isolating this experience can be and how she longs for community. She’s candid about her love life, from her crushes on unavailable women to the unsatisfying dates, and eventually, to the woman she begins to build a life with.
For me, one of the most heartbreaking moments came when Lamya and her partner visit her family. They establish ground rules about avoiding affectionate behavior, ensuring her family won’t suspect they’re a couple. Her partner charms everyone, yet they can’t be open about who they are to each other. There’s the looming fear that her family, who clearly love her, might reject her if they discover this part of her identity. The idea that “there’s no homosexuality” in their country hangs over them like a dark cloud. It’s a painful reminder of the sacrifices queer individuals often make to keep their familial relationships intact.
Another part of the memoir that struck me was Lamya’s journey to remain in the U.S. legally. Her experience with the stress of navigating the immigration system resonated with a particular poignancy. I’ve read other immigrant stories, but Lamya’s description of the hoops she had to jump through hit especially hard.
One thing I truly appreciated was how unapologetically vocal Lamya is about her faith. Her connection to her religion and how she finds strength and guidance from stories in the Quran added a powerful layer to the memoir. It reminded me of Sabrina Imbler’s How Far the Light Reaches, where the author connects their experiences with marine creatures. Similarly, Lamya links key moments in her life to figures like Maryam or Musa, drawing parallels between her struggles and the lessons in her faith. Her devoutness and how she uses her queerness and outsider status to shape her worldviews stood out as one of the most compelling aspects of the memoir.
When it comes to rating this book, I’ll admit I struggled. It’s a five-star read on so many levels. However, the fact that Lamya has to remain anonymous, and that some details might be omitted to protect her identity, made me hesitate. Yet, lowering the rating for that reason feels like overlooking the reality of her constant need to protect herself, which is integral to understanding her story. So, five stars it is.
Graphic: Misogyny, Sexism, Islamophobia, and Religious bigotry
Moderate: Homophobia and Xenophobia
readandfindout's review against another edition
4.25
Themes: 4.5 stars
Perspective: 4.5 stars
Graphic: Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, Self harm, Xenophobia, Islamophobia, and Lesbophobia
Moderate: Bullying, Domestic abuse, Racial slurs, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Religious bigotry, Abandonment, and Classism
Minor: Emotional abuse, Colonisation, and Deportation
sadhbhprice's review against another edition
4.25
Graphic: Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Xenophobia, Islamophobia, Religious bigotry, Lesbophobia, and Deportation
Moderate: Biphobia, Bullying, Domestic abuse, Sexism, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, and Classism
Minor: Pregnancy
corsetedfeminist's review against another edition
5.0
That sound you hear is the universe cackling at me.
This book wrecked me. It made me laugh, it made me cry. And then cry again. Okay, I cried a lot. Mostly good tears.
I read the whole thing and finished at 1am.
This book is a beautiful but pointedly honest story of the author’s life, interweaving themes of queerness and Islam and her experiences as a brown person with stories from the Quran that illustrate the point at hand.
This is the first book I’ve read since deconstructing my own faith that embraced religion, and while it did not change my beliefs, it still healed part of my soul to see in print someone who could be so deeply religious and queer at the same time, taking back her own religion’s stories.
Her descriptions of navigating queerness and other people’s religion, especially her family and Muslim friends, was incredibly familiar to me as someone living in the rural south with a very Christian family- especially her discussion of how flippant and reductive we can be when encouraging people to just come out and potentially cut off their family.
Her discussions of her gender and sexuality awakenings were honest and once again far too relatable, especially from one gender non-conforming lesbian to another.
Over all, this book is both beauty and protest, all wrapped up in one, leaving the reader with a hopeful perspective about everything, despite having our illusions of equality and acceptance challenged. Its perspective on the intersection of faith, race, immigration, gender, and sexuality is unmatched and begs for an audience.
Graphic: Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, and Xenophobia
clarabooksit's review
4.5
Graphic: Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, Sexism, Transphobia, Xenophobia, Islamophobia, Religious bigotry, and Lesbophobia
Moderate: Body shaming, Emotional abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Grief, and Classism
Minor: Domestic abuse and Violence
abnormal_shadow's review against another edition
4.75
Graphic: Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, Transphobia, Xenophobia, Islamophobia, Religious bigotry, Lesbophobia, Abandonment, Dysphoria, and Classism
shaun_dh's review against another edition
5.0
It’s pretty amazing that I saw so much of myself in the author—me, a cis femme Biracial Black atheist witch dyke—especially in the final chapter. It feels like that chapter could have been written for me
This book is for anyone who has felt othered, anyone who is curious about religious interpretation, anyone who is interested in differing perspectives. Anyone with an open mind. Really, I think everyone needs to read this
Minor: Child abuse, Confinement, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Homophobia, Infertility, Misogyny, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, Slavery, Suicidal thoughts, Transphobia, Xenophobia, Police brutality, Islamophobia, Dementia, Religious bigotry, Lesbophobia, Alcohol, Colonisation, and Classism
clarkg's review against another edition
5.0
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, Sexism, Xenophobia, Islamophobia, Religious bigotry, Colonisation, and Deportation
Minor: Alcoholism, Animal death, Child abuse, Infidelity, Suicide, Alcohol, Injury/Injury detail, and Classism
fkshg8465's review against another edition
5.0
Graphic: Biphobia, Bullying, Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Xenophobia, Islamophobia, Religious bigotry, Lesbophobia, Outing, Colonisation, Classism, and Deportation
arayo's review against another edition
5.0
Graphic: Homophobia, Misogyny, Racism, Xenophobia, and Islamophobia
Moderate: Religious bigotry, Lesbophobia, and Classism
Minor: Bullying, Domestic abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Colonisation, and Deportation