adrianlarose's review
5.0
adjacent to folks who have various of these life experiences and maybe loved is a weird word but loved reading this because it expresses what it is and how sometimes you just need to be and also it's poetry, but (mostly) in letters?
lifeinpoetry's review
5.0
Sometimes my hands turn into claws and the ache stops me from texting. Know then that I still love you. Maybe call me? Maybe wait a little longer? Sometimes I will text you through the pain and I promise that is sacrificial love. I’m not saying it’s right. But is love right or wrong?
(from “[Dear friends, lovers, and in-betweens]”)
I tell you, I need space, but boundaries are hard to press down onto, put into place, spread apart. If I tell you I don’t want to have sex, will you tell me it’s okay? The vampire in me draws you in, but as soon as I have you, I don’t know what to do with you. The only way I know desire is to watch you salivate over me, as I smell the blood moving forcefully through your veins.
(from “[Dear friends, lovers, and in-betweens]”)
when i research trans people and fibromyalgia, or trans people and chronic pain, no matter how many times I look, the answers are few and far between, the google search coming up empty, and I check each day, hoping for different answers, new studies, hoping today is the day new research comes out to corroborate my own theories, but it never does.
& and we are reduced to our hormones, the gender assigned at birth, the female or male of it all & I’m not talking about forgetting biology but the cis-centric story of it all is that women have pain & men don’t, the cis-centric of it all is that women are weak & men are not, the cis-centric of it is old stories we tell ourselves over & over, first through religion & then through science, the new immovable frontier.
am I a reliable source if the ache of my body tells me a story truer than any I’ve read?
(from “[Dear friends, lovers, and in-betweens]”)
I tell you, I need space, but boundaries are hard to press down onto, put into place, spread apart. If I tell you I don’t want to have sex, will you tell me it’s okay? The vampire in me draws you in, but as soon as I have you, I don’t know what to do with you. The only way I know desire is to watch you salivate over me, as I smell the blood moving forcefully through your veins.
(from “[Dear friends, lovers, and in-betweens]”)
when i research trans people and fibromyalgia, or trans people and chronic pain, no matter how many times I look, the answers are few and far between, the google search coming up empty, and I check each day, hoping for different answers, new studies, hoping today is the day new research comes out to corroborate my own theories, but it never does.
& and we are reduced to our hormones, the gender assigned at birth, the female or male of it all & I’m not talking about forgetting biology but the cis-centric story of it all is that women have pain & men don’t, the cis-centric of it all is that women are weak & men are not, the cis-centric of it is old stories we tell ourselves over & over, first through religion & then through science, the new immovable frontier.
am I a reliable source if the ache of my body tells me a story truer than any I’ve read?
brogan7's review
challenging
slow-paced
3.5
You don't have to like every part of a book to get something out of it, but you have to like a book enough to keep reading it to get to the really good parts.
This book could have used a fiercer editor. The most interesting part was "Self prescribed bed rest," pp. 79-96, and I almost didn't get there.
Unfortunately, a lot of the writing was precious, capitalizing on the attraction of identity politics...their "Dear friends, lovers and in-betweens" were frequently boring, self-focussed and self-centered.
But then, this part, about the struggle, about chronic pain, about marginalization and the struggle to get information about one's specific syndrome, specific experience....it's beautiful and real and political and important.
This book could have used a fiercer editor. The most interesting part was "Self prescribed bed rest," pp. 79-96, and I almost didn't get there.
Unfortunately, a lot of the writing was precious, capitalizing on the attraction of identity politics...their "Dear friends, lovers and in-betweens" were frequently boring, self-focussed and self-centered.
But then, this part, about the struggle, about chronic pain, about marginalization and the struggle to get information about one's specific syndrome, specific experience....it's beautiful and real and political and important.
lizlikesfrogs's review
adventurous
challenging
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
sad
fast-paced
4.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Transphobia, Ableism, and Medical trauma
Minor: Fatphobia
arsenic_'s review
reflective
slow-paced
4.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Medical trauma and Chronic illness