luce98's review against another edition
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexism and Racism
Moderate: Abortion, Violence, Slavery, Misogyny, Sexual violence, and Rape
suneaters's review against another edition
funny
informative
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
For whatever reason, we hold feminism to an unreasonable standard where the movement must be everything we want and must always make the best choices. When feminism falls short of our expectations, we decide the problem is with feminism rather than with the flawed people who act in the name of the movement. (x)
Roxane Gay's Bad Feminist Essays is a great work. Her writing is sharp and witty and she maintains a humorous tone even as she becomes very emotionally vulnerable. Gay comes across as relatable as she tells us she "approach[es] most things in life with a dangerous level of confidence to balance [her] generally low self-esteem." (34). She speaks candidly of her own assault and weight gain, but is still able to keep it light. Gay tells us that she "I watch[es] all the televised fat-shaming porn as penance and motivation—The Biggest Loser and Ruby and Heavy, some of those off-brand fat people shows on lesser cable channels, and recently Extreme Makeover: Fat People Edition." (116). Her own story is heartbreaking on its own, but also heartbreakingly common. It's devastating how often something so traumatic happens and causes the victim to try to self-soothe or to protect his or herself via food.
Gay makes fantastic points about modern feminism and other related discourse. I love her particular commentary on oppression Olympics and gatekeeping commenting as it serves no purpose but to silence people and dilute the meaning of words like "privilege".
The problem is, cultural critics talk about privilege with such alarming
frequency and in such empty ways, we have diluted the word’s meaning.
When people wield the word “privilege,” it tends to fall on deaf ears
because we hear that word so damn much it has become white noise. (16)
Nowadays, when someone writes, say, a gay bildungsroman, the author might have his or her sexuality questioned and feel extreme pressure to out his or herself due to the backlash of "don't write out of your experience". Gay rebukes this quite adeptly.
In online discourse, in particular, the specter of privilege is always looming darkly. When someone writes from experience, there is often someone else, at the ready, pointing a trembling finger, accusing that writer of having various kinds of privilege. How dare someone speak to a personal experience without accounting for every possible configuration of privilege or the lack thereof? We would live in a world of silence if the only people who were allowed to write or speak from experience or about difference were those absolutely without privilege. (18)
Her opinion on reclamation, that "I have no interest in using the word to describe myself or any person of color, under any circumstance. There is no reclamation to be had." (221), is one I share.
I also enjoyed her mentions of modern misogyny and how feminists are unduly punished for showing any modicum of dissatisfaction with patriarchy.
Pointing out the many ways in which misogyny persists and harms women is not anger. Conceding the idea that anger is an inappropriate reaction to the injustice women face backs women into an unfair position. Nor does disagreement mean we are blind to the ways in which progress has been made. Feminists are celebrating our victories and acknowledging our privilege when we have it. We’re simply refusing to settle. We’re refusing to forget how much work there is yet to be done. We’re refusing to relish the comforts we have at the expense of the women who are still seeking comfort. (102)
Gay mentions that "We live in a strange and terrible time for women. There are days when I think it has always been a strange and terrible time to be a woman. Womanhood feels more strange and terrible now because progress has not served women as well as it has served men. We are still stymied by the issues our forbears railed against." (132). And she is right in her assessment. Women's rights have been going backward as of late and we are now having to refight thing like the urinary leash.
Even as women watch our rights be taken away, we are judged for not enjoying misogynistic jokes at our expense. Men are offended that we see this as a red flag and that we believe them when they tell us who they are. "When women respond negatively to misogynistic or rape humor, they are “sensitive” and branded as “feminist,” a word that has, as of late, become a catchall term for “woman who does not tolerate bullshit.” (180). Just like "feminist", the moniker of Karen, feminazi, harpy, femoid, TERF, or any other derogatory word for a women has come to simply mean women who do not bow down to male authority. It recalls a simpler definition of feminist, "one offered by Su, an Australian woman who, when interviewed for Kathy Bail’s 1996 anthology DIY Feminism, said feminists are “just women who don’t want to be treated like shit.”" (303).
While Bad Feminist Essays is overall very enjoyable and a great read, there is some liberal bullshit in here. "Western opinions on the hijab or burkas are rather irrelevant. We don’t get to decide for Muslim women what does or does not oppress them, no matter how highly we think of ourselves." (104). Well, I guess I better stop saying Aisha was a child bride. I mean, maybe she was a totally empowered 8 year old and I'm just being mean. This is a ridiculous stance. No culture, no religion, no anything is above criticism. And I am of the view that if it hurts women, it has to go.
Gay also comments on "breaking new ground where women can be feminist and feminine and can resist the labels and forces that all too often marginalize, silence, or erase female experiences." (106). Yeah, those feminine women are so shamed for being feminine. Meanwhile I've never seen a single butch woman on TV or in a movie. Get real, please.
"The Fifty Shades books have also opened the door for pundits, including Ellen DeGeneres, to treat the BDSM lifestyle with derision, mockery, and outright ignorance. Whips and chains are so very funny, or they are freaky and weird." (200). This whole kink section was so very funny. Sorry. Your Looney Tunes sex is funny and also very weird. Re-traumatizing yourself and trauma bonds are not healing.
Even as women watch our rights be taken away, we are judged for not enjoying misogynistic jokes at our expense. Men are offended that we see this as a red flag and that we believe them when they tell us who they are. "When women respond negatively to misogynistic or rape humor, they are “sensitive” and branded as “feminist,” a word that has, as of late, become a catchall term for “woman who does not tolerate bullshit.” (180). Just like "feminist", the moniker of Karen, feminazi, harpy, femoid, TERF, or any other derogatory word for a women has come to simply mean women who do not bow down to male authority. It recalls a simpler definition of feminist, "one offered by Su, an Australian woman who, when interviewed for Kathy Bail’s 1996 anthology DIY Feminism, said feminists are “just women who don’t want to be treated like shit.”" (303).
While Bad Feminist Essays is overall very enjoyable and a great read, there is some liberal bullshit in here. "Western opinions on the hijab or burkas are rather irrelevant. We don’t get to decide for Muslim women what does or does not oppress them, no matter how highly we think of ourselves." (104). Well, I guess I better stop saying Aisha was a child bride. I mean, maybe she was a totally empowered 8 year old and I'm just being mean. This is a ridiculous stance. No culture, no religion, no anything is above criticism. And I am of the view that if it hurts women, it has to go.
Gay also comments on "breaking new ground where women can be feminist and feminine and can resist the labels and forces that all too often marginalize, silence, or erase female experiences." (106). Yeah, those feminine women are so shamed for being feminine. Meanwhile I've never seen a single butch woman on TV or in a movie. Get real, please.
"The Fifty Shades books have also opened the door for pundits, including Ellen DeGeneres, to treat the BDSM lifestyle with derision, mockery, and outright ignorance. Whips and chains are so very funny, or they are freaky and weird." (200). This whole kink section was so very funny. Sorry. Your Looney Tunes sex is funny and also very weird. Re-traumatizing yourself and trauma bonds are not healing.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Misogyny, Racism, Sexual assault, Rape, and Sexual violence
rakkaussipsi's review against another edition
informative
reflective
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual assault, Racism, Misogyny, and Rape
Moderate: Child abuse
leweylibrary's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
informative
reflective
slow-paced
3.75
I feel like a jerk rating this so low because it's Roxane Gay and she's amazing, but I felt like the essays were a little all over the place for me? They were all well written of course and many were powerful, but there was just hat something special, that oomph missing for me I guess.
It is fascinating thinking about how these essays were written almost ten years ago and so many of the issues they deal with are still just as prevalent now. And not in a fun way, in a depressing way.
It is fascinating thinking about how these essays were written almost ten years ago and so many of the issues they deal with are still just as prevalent now. And not in a fun way, in a depressing way.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Slavery, Rape, Racism, Racial slurs, Police brutality, Murder, Misogyny, Fatphobia, and Abortion
Moderate: Toxic relationship and Eating disorder
ginimeh's review against another edition
challenging
funny
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
2.5
I read Bad Feminist in 2023 after years and years of having it on my reading list. I think this is why I was so disappointed by the book. I only ever knew the title and after coming to terms with the fact that Gay is not writing about being a bad feminist but mainly popculture and the time the book was written I was ready and set to read it in historical context.
There were a lot of points where I thought "if I read this as a teen back when it was published I'd be able to take so much from it" and some thoughts and sentences are a welcomed gift for the next arguments I'll have with sexists or racists but further than that it didn't give me much. The only thing I really take away from it is that 2014 was still a year when "being feminist" meant to be a woman, to only talk about two genders, to mix up liking a specific color and shaving your legs is the same as supporting being a bad feminist. Honestly the last chapter accomplished to ruin the book for me. 2014 is almost a decade ago but if you write a book about feminism (no matter if it's about your perspective or the lense of media and society) I think one should look at the big scope of privilege and not only brush them while talking about two main points or axes of intersectionality. But maybe I'm putting to much responsibility on the author and thereby proof her point that we expect a lot from feminism.
Also I read it in German and the translation were horribly stiff sometimes.
There were a lot of points where I thought "if I read this as a teen back when it was published I'd be able to take so much from it" and some thoughts and sentences are a welcomed gift for the next arguments I'll have with sexists or racists but further than that it didn't give me much. The only thing I really take away from it is that 2014 was still a year when "being feminist" meant to be a woman, to only talk about two genders, to mix up liking a specific color and shaving your legs is the same as supporting being a bad feminist. Honestly the last chapter accomplished to ruin the book for me. 2014 is almost a decade ago but if you write a book about feminism (no matter if it's about your perspective or the lense of media and society) I think one should look at the big scope of privilege and not only brush them while talking about two main points or axes of intersectionality. But maybe I'm putting to much responsibility on the author and thereby proof her point that we expect a lot from feminism.
Also I read it in German and the translation were horribly stiff sometimes.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Hate crime, Murder, Police brutality, Slavery, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Mass/school shootings, Physical abuse, Drug use, Misogyny, Racism, Sexual harassment, Violence, Cultural appropriation, Rape, and Sexual assault
schnanko's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Misogyny, Police brutality, Racial slurs, Sexism, Fatphobia, Gun violence, Racism, Abortion, Death, Slavery, Violence, Rape, Sexual violence, Sexual assault, and Sexual harassment
lubarbara's review against another edition
emotional
funny
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
3.0
La considero una lectura importante del feminismo, pero no así esencial. Si bien me dejó pensando en varias ocasiones mi rol como mujer y feminista, me fue difícil encontrarme o identificarme con varias de las dificultades planteadas por la autora ya que yo no soy ni negra ni estadounidense. Además, muchas referencias a la cultura pop no las entendí (creo que es muy específico de los 2010’s y se pierden bastantes cosas).
Sin embargo, hay experiencias universales que vivimos todas las mujeres y se encuentran muy bien retratadas. La invitación a cuestionarnos, pero a ser más pacientes y amorosas con nosotras mismas es muy clara y necesaria.
Sin embargo, hay experiencias universales que vivimos todas las mujeres y se encuentran muy bien retratadas. La invitación a cuestionarnos, pero a ser más pacientes y amorosas con nosotras mismas es muy clara y necesaria.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual assault, Rape, Misogyny, Sexism, Slavery, and Racial slurs
Moderate: Child death, Murder, and Hate crime
onlyonebookshelf's review against another edition
funny
hopeful
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Sexual assault, Racism, Sexism, Misogyny, and Sexual violence
kianga_black's review
challenging
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Murder, Sexism, Sexual harassment, Gun violence, Hate crime, Mass/school shootings, Misogyny, Racism, Violence, Slavery, and Xenophobia
lady_moon's review against another edition
1.5
Some version of the dream of this book still lives in the back of my head and maybe one day I'll find the excellent collection of essays that this book absolutely was not.
Bad Feminist had a good start. I had fun listening in the beginning, I enjoyed her talking about her time as an advisor, about privilege and her time as professor. There was an essay about scrabble...? That was boring and pretty pointless. Then there was an essay about how to have women friends, which was... a list with just common sense and stupid points. But I tell myself, okay I can ignore that.
But there were also essays that talked about random pieces of media? Some shows and books, some critique, like... I don't know any of this media, except The Hunger Games, so I wasn't really invested in all this. I wasn't fan of the The Hunger Games essay though. I just didn't care to be honest? It didn't add anything to the conversation. If this was a memoir or something, fine, but it isn't - this is book with essays named Bad Feminist. Such essays were just a little out of place. And I personally was annoyed at the unnecessary amatonormativity that was present.
Now, I could have ignored all of this. I really could have. But then the trigger warning discussion came. And it pissed me off. For the most part there was nuance and dissection, about censorship and what can be a trigger. But then she basically said she can't understand how some people live in the illusion of safety and that trigger warning won't protect them from what already is inside them. I'm sorry but what the fuck?? Does she know think "warning" means? It's not there to protect you or to prevent you from consuming this media (as she also thinks) but to warn you what you're going to consume so you can take care of yourself if needed. What was this bullshit, honestly? This is the first time I really felt there's something not quite right with this book.
(Not to mention before that there's a heavy discussion of rape and her own rape and right after that to have is an essay about trigger warning... I mean, that's petty.)
Then there's one waaayyy too long essay that criticize Fifty Shades of Grey. Woman, what the hell 😭 We all know this book is shit, there really wasn't need of such deep critique of it (half of which is a rant, honestly). I was really tempted to DNF at that point.
Other thing that baffled me: The hunting of witches is, apperantly, because rulers wanted to prevent abortions?? 😭 What is this woman talking about, I- Tell me you don't know anything outside of USA history without telling you don't know anything outside of USA.
The hunting of witches isn't some trick the government to take down people who know the medicine for abortion (maybe that was someone's idea, I don't know). Hunting witches was rooted in superstition, xenophobia, bigotry and most of all - misogyny. Don't make it related to something irrelevant just so it can appeal to American issue.
After that it was a series of discussion of different movies with Black representations. I knew exactly two of this movies/Tv series, one of which I haven't watched. This was curious for me, as a white person who doesn't watch a lot of these genres, let alone critique of it.
Overall, there just... wasn't anything new? Anything even remotely deeper to add to the discussion regarding feminism. Not even to the conversation about race to be honest? There wasn't anything new, anything interesting, not even in the way it was presented to us. I do enjoyed some things in the beginning but then it quickly became painfully average. Kudos for the advertisement lol, I was really convinced I'm picking up an amazing book.
Bad Feminist had a good start. I had fun listening in the beginning, I enjoyed her talking about her time as an advisor, about privilege and her time as professor. There was an essay about scrabble...? That was boring and pretty pointless. Then there was an essay about how to have women friends, which was... a list with just common sense and stupid points. But I tell myself, okay I can ignore that.
But there were also essays that talked about random pieces of media? Some shows and books, some critique, like... I don't know any of this media, except The Hunger Games, so I wasn't really invested in all this. I wasn't fan of the The Hunger Games essay though. I just didn't care to be honest? It didn't add anything to the conversation. If this was a memoir or something, fine, but it isn't - this is book with essays named Bad Feminist. Such essays were just a little out of place. And I personally was annoyed at the unnecessary amatonormativity that was present.
Now, I could have ignored all of this. I really could have. But then the trigger warning discussion came. And it pissed me off. For the most part there was nuance and dissection, about censorship and what can be a trigger. But then she basically said she can't understand how some people live in the illusion of safety and that trigger warning won't protect them from what already is inside them. I'm sorry but what the fuck?? Does she know think "warning" means? It's not there to protect you or to prevent you from consuming this media (as she also thinks) but to warn you what you're going to consume so you can take care of yourself if needed. What was this bullshit, honestly? This is the first time I really felt there's something not quite right with this book.
(Not to mention before that there's a heavy discussion of rape and her own rape and right after that to have is an essay about trigger warning... I mean, that's petty.)
Then there's one waaayyy too long essay that criticize Fifty Shades of Grey. Woman, what the hell 😭 We all know this book is shit, there really wasn't need of such deep critique of it (half of which is a rant, honestly). I was really tempted to DNF at that point.
Other thing that baffled me: The hunting of witches is, apperantly, because rulers wanted to prevent abortions?? 😭 What is this woman talking about, I- Tell me you don't know anything outside of USA history without telling you don't know anything outside of USA.
The hunting of witches isn't some trick the government to take down people who know the medicine for abortion (maybe that was someone's idea, I don't know). Hunting witches was rooted in superstition, xenophobia, bigotry and most of all - misogyny. Don't make it related to something irrelevant just so it can appeal to American issue.
After that it was a series of discussion of different movies with Black representations. I knew exactly two of this movies/Tv series, one of which I haven't watched. This was curious for me, as a white person who doesn't watch a lot of these genres, let alone critique of it.
Overall, there just... wasn't anything new? Anything even remotely deeper to add to the discussion regarding feminism. Not even to the conversation about race to be honest? There wasn't anything new, anything interesting, not even in the way it was presented to us. I do enjoyed some things in the beginning but then it quickly became painfully average. Kudos for the advertisement lol, I was really convinced I'm picking up an amazing book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Abortion, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Ableism, Alcohol, Classism, Pregnancy, Rape, Sexism, Body shaming, Fatphobia, Miscarriage, and Misogyny
Moderate: Homophobia, Acephobia/Arophobia, Hate crime, Bullying, Pedophilia, Slavery, and Vomit
Minor: Eating disorder, Medical content, and Outing