kfriend's review
5.0
Even though I’m a long time fan of Siobhan Davis, I’d been avoiding reading this book. As a child of an addict myself, I find it a difficult topic for writers to effectively convey- either the story is too gritty, too real, too hopeless, or it isn’t enough of those things. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to root for an addict as a heroine- particularly one that falls into the privileged/rich kid stereotype. But this emotional, unflinching story of tragedy and addiction worked for me- and the more I think about it, the more connected to it I feel.
Our leading man, Adam, is a college athlete, on the pathway to the NFL. He’s got it all together, but his younger sister is sick and his mother is struggling to make ends meet- so he turns back to what he never thought he’d return to- drug dealing. His path first crosses our heroine Emily in a hospital- as she’s recovering from her latest bender, and later they find their lives intertwined as Adam ends up becoming Emily’s drug dealer. Their chemistry is instance- Adam recognizes a lost soul in Emily, and he wants to shield her from herself. Emily is in a lot of trouble in a number of ways- but she finds the first real, meaningful and reciprocated connection she’s ever had in Adam.
I love how the authors challenge character archetypes here, it makes for some really interesting character development and for an intense emotional connection to each of them. Adam plays football, but he’s not the “jock,” and he may very well be one of the most charming, authentic, and likable heroes I’ve read to date. He’s committed to those he loves, he’s kind and thoughtful, and he’s more conservative sexually and more emotionally open than Emily. He’s the responsible one- the caregiver and altruistic nurturer. SD/SA give him a refreshing self-awareness- he’s both unapologetic about having to do what he does to help his sister while also keenly feeling the weight of enabling the destruction of others- a guilt that is magnified when he becomes the gateway to Emily’s drug abuse. Oh, Emily- she’s such a heartbreaking, a train wreck you can’t turn away from. Her addiction plays a huge role in her identity, so much so that she’s not even sure she knows who she is when she’s not under the influence. She can’t function without a fix, and she’s spirarling, self-destructing pill by pill. She’s just so incredibly lost- and devastatingly alone- surrounded by friends who enable her and encourage her to engage in activities she regrets and a distant family. To be honest, it was hard to love Emily- not only because of my personal history but because her addiction masks who she really is for much of the book. She’s not the kind of heroine you want to be, or even be friends with, but that’s the point- we aren’t meant to romanticize her, we’re meant to understand her- to walk in shoes, and in that, this book truly shines.
At first I had a hard time getting into the story- both because I was apprehensive and because I was waiting for the love story to pick up, and then I realized this really isn’t about the love story. Don’t worry- there is one, and it is charming, healing, deeply emotional, and as steamy as you’d expect from SD. But more so, I found this story to be about one of the greatest challenges in the human experience- COPING. This is a story about two people who have been victimized- literally and metaphorically. Two people trying to cope with the adversity of their lives. Two people who on the surface have the entire world at their fingertips, but who struggle, everyday, to live the life they want. Two people who are trying to slay their own personal demons- and who just so happen to find real and authentic connection, a connection that bolsters them for the battles they were already waging individually.
Their story is not easy- we have lots triggering topics (with some shocking situations- this is SD!), and some truly heartbreaking moments- one of which was so devastating that I feel it might leave a permanent scar on my heart. Is this a perfect depiction of the heartbreaking complexities of the impact of addiction and overcoming it? No, no at all- this is still fiction, and it is still a romance. But, the spirit of what is here is what matters. Emily and Adam’s story is haunting, at times uncomfortable, but it is beautifully hopeful at its core. A testament to the power of healing and connection, that we can find new and healthier ways to cope even when we are in the darkest points of despair. You can hit rock bottom and still learn to thrive, you can hit rock bottom and still be worthy of love and forgiveness, you can hit rock bottom and still be strong.
Our leading man, Adam, is a college athlete, on the pathway to the NFL. He’s got it all together, but his younger sister is sick and his mother is struggling to make ends meet- so he turns back to what he never thought he’d return to- drug dealing. His path first crosses our heroine Emily in a hospital- as she’s recovering from her latest bender, and later they find their lives intertwined as Adam ends up becoming Emily’s drug dealer. Their chemistry is instance- Adam recognizes a lost soul in Emily, and he wants to shield her from herself. Emily is in a lot of trouble in a number of ways- but she finds the first real, meaningful and reciprocated connection she’s ever had in Adam.
I love how the authors challenge character archetypes here, it makes for some really interesting character development and for an intense emotional connection to each of them. Adam plays football, but he’s not the “jock,” and he may very well be one of the most charming, authentic, and likable heroes I’ve read to date. He’s committed to those he loves, he’s kind and thoughtful, and he’s more conservative sexually and more emotionally open than Emily. He’s the responsible one- the caregiver and altruistic nurturer. SD/SA give him a refreshing self-awareness- he’s both unapologetic about having to do what he does to help his sister while also keenly feeling the weight of enabling the destruction of others- a guilt that is magnified when he becomes the gateway to Emily’s drug abuse. Oh, Emily- she’s such a heartbreaking, a train wreck you can’t turn away from. Her addiction plays a huge role in her identity, so much so that she’s not even sure she knows who she is when she’s not under the influence. She can’t function without a fix, and she’s spirarling, self-destructing pill by pill. She’s just so incredibly lost- and devastatingly alone- surrounded by friends who enable her and encourage her to engage in activities she regrets and a distant family. To be honest, it was hard to love Emily- not only because of my personal history but because her addiction masks who she really is for much of the book. She’s not the kind of heroine you want to be, or even be friends with, but that’s the point- we aren’t meant to romanticize her, we’re meant to understand her- to walk in shoes, and in that, this book truly shines.
At first I had a hard time getting into the story- both because I was apprehensive and because I was waiting for the love story to pick up, and then I realized this really isn’t about the love story. Don’t worry- there is one, and it is charming, healing, deeply emotional, and as steamy as you’d expect from SD. But more so, I found this story to be about one of the greatest challenges in the human experience- COPING. This is a story about two people who have been victimized- literally and metaphorically. Two people trying to cope with the adversity of their lives. Two people who on the surface have the entire world at their fingertips, but who struggle, everyday, to live the life they want. Two people who are trying to slay their own personal demons- and who just so happen to find real and authentic connection, a connection that bolsters them for the battles they were already waging individually.
Their story is not easy- we have lots triggering topics (with some shocking situations- this is SD!), and some truly heartbreaking moments- one of which was so devastating that I feel it might leave a permanent scar on my heart. Is this a perfect depiction of the heartbreaking complexities of the impact of addiction and overcoming it? No, no at all- this is still fiction, and it is still a romance. But, the spirit of what is here is what matters. Emily and Adam’s story is haunting, at times uncomfortable, but it is beautifully hopeful at its core. A testament to the power of healing and connection, that we can find new and healthier ways to cope even when we are in the darkest points of despair. You can hit rock bottom and still learn to thrive, you can hit rock bottom and still be worthy of love and forgiveness, you can hit rock bottom and still be strong.
hannas_heas47's review
3.0
Thanks to the author for a ARC to read and give my honest opinion.
This was hard to get into for me only because I couldnt at first see these two getting together. Adams a footballer, my body is my temple, but I sell drugs because my mom with no job /sister with medical condition need money. Emily is from a wealthy family but has a drug problem because of an unknown issue that later comes out. I felt the middle of the book grow stronger then the finale just lose momentum. Really crazy ride right?
What did I like? When Emily was being good, she was good with Adam but when Emily was on molly she was horrible. I thought the Jekyll and Hyde character kind of draining and the drug use over the top. It just didn’t lead to a situation that I would warrant reading.
This was hard to get into for me only because I couldnt at first see these two getting together. Adams a footballer, my body is my temple, but I sell drugs because my mom with no job /sister with medical condition need money. Emily is from a wealthy family but has a drug problem because of an unknown issue that later comes out. I felt the middle of the book grow stronger then the finale just lose momentum. Really crazy ride right?
What did I like? When Emily was being good, she was good with Adam but when Emily was on molly she was horrible. I thought the Jekyll and Hyde character kind of draining and the drug use over the top. It just didn’t lead to a situation that I would warrant reading.
kodom251999's review
4.0
I LOVED Adam! He read like the sweet boy next door. He was always looking for ways to help his mom and sister. He was willing to take risk for them. I loved his core group of friends too! I never saw the twist coming. I knew there was a reason behind Emily’s drug use, but I never thought he would be as close as he was.
I hated her mother. I can’t imagine living like that. I loved her father, and even though I felt he could have done more, he was still trying. I didn’t see his secret coming though. I want more of these characters!
I hated her mother. I can’t imagine living like that. I loved her father, and even though I felt he could have done more, he was still trying. I didn’t see his secret coming though. I want more of these characters!
bookbirch1's review
4.0
A Beautifully Written Story
Holding On To Forever is the story of Adam and Emily. Adam is a star football player on scholarship and Emily is the beautiful coaches daughter. Adam is not your typical jock. He puts his family and those he loves above everything else. Due to this he makes questionable decisions, one of which is selling the drug, Molly. Emily has had a hard life. She parties and does drugs to escape her reality. These two meet when Adam unknowingly becomes Emily's new Molly dealer. They have a connection immediately and you can feel it through the pages of this book. Of course they are so many things that are standing in their way of being together. Adam and Emily must decide if they can face their demons and come out stronger together to make a relationship work or go their separate ways. This isn't a fairytale romance, it is a strong and powerful beautifully written story full of angst and love. It truly is a must read!!
Holding On To Forever is the story of Adam and Emily. Adam is a star football player on scholarship and Emily is the beautiful coaches daughter. Adam is not your typical jock. He puts his family and those he loves above everything else. Due to this he makes questionable decisions, one of which is selling the drug, Molly. Emily has had a hard life. She parties and does drugs to escape her reality. These two meet when Adam unknowingly becomes Emily's new Molly dealer. They have a connection immediately and you can feel it through the pages of this book. Of course they are so many things that are standing in their way of being together. Adam and Emily must decide if they can face their demons and come out stronger together to make a relationship work or go their separate ways. This isn't a fairytale romance, it is a strong and powerful beautifully written story full of angst and love. It truly is a must read!!
amz101's review
5.0
So I’m not new to Siobhan Davis but S.B Alexander is a new to me author, so when I saw that SD had calibrated with her... someone I had never read before I was intrigued, and holy crap... I’m not sure what I was expecting when I went it to this book, but it sure as hell wasn’t what I go, but that’s not a bad thing. This book had me clenching my kindle, on the edge of my seat and totally and utterly obsessed with this plot.
It’s definitely not a light hearted read. It hit some pretty real and relatable topics for me. The past abuse, addiction, and heartache, all things I can relate to on a deep level.
Now to give a spoiler free review!... gah!
In this we’ve got Emily and Adam,
Adam is collage student, young, his whole life a head off him, he’s a quarterback for his school, but there are two sides to this guy. The Quarterback and the drug dealer. He’s forced to sell drugs to support his family. For that level of responsibility and the fact he had to sell drugs for his family, that broke my heart... but for him, it’s what he had to do to make sure his family were okay. He was so sweet, he caring and loving, I could help but fall for then character and it was much the same for Emily, now she comes into the picture when Adam and her cross each other’s paths and she turns out to be one of his customers,. things take a turn, and everything starts to change as we progress into the book.
Emily was definitely different to what I usually look for in a female lead character, but that isn’t a bad thing, she was misunderstood and the things she was going through made my heart ache... and she was trying to mask her demons...
These two were on fire and have that familiar push and pull, the angst factor is high as fuck and it was enough to send crazy.... but I I loved every god damn word of it..
I went into this book blind and I’m glad I did, because as soon as I hit half way through the first chapter, I was hooked.
I couldn’t get enough. The way the authors played these characters out was pure perfection!! Boys personalities were different yet, the balanced each other out an in way their personality bounced off each other.
Seriously, I wouldn’t get enough. It was captivating, all-consuming, adding and I struggled to put it down!
I came recommend this book enough.
5 angsty stars!!!
It’s definitely not a light hearted read. It hit some pretty real and relatable topics for me. The past abuse, addiction, and heartache, all things I can relate to on a deep level.
Now to give a spoiler free review!... gah!
In this we’ve got Emily and Adam,
Adam is collage student, young, his whole life a head off him, he’s a quarterback for his school, but there are two sides to this guy. The Quarterback and the drug dealer. He’s forced to sell drugs to support his family. For that level of responsibility and the fact he had to sell drugs for his family, that broke my heart... but for him, it’s what he had to do to make sure his family were okay. He was so sweet, he caring and loving, I could help but fall for then character and it was much the same for Emily, now she comes into the picture when Adam and her cross each other’s paths and she turns out to be one of his customers,. things take a turn, and everything starts to change as we progress into the book.
Emily was definitely different to what I usually look for in a female lead character, but that isn’t a bad thing, she was misunderstood and the things she was going through made my heart ache... and she was trying to mask her demons...
These two were on fire and have that familiar push and pull, the angst factor is high as fuck and it was enough to send crazy.... but I I loved every god damn word of it..
I went into this book blind and I’m glad I did, because as soon as I hit half way through the first chapter, I was hooked.
I couldn’t get enough. The way the authors played these characters out was pure perfection!! Boys personalities were different yet, the balanced each other out an in way their personality bounced off each other.
Seriously, I wouldn’t get enough. It was captivating, all-consuming, adding and I struggled to put it down!
I came recommend this book enough.
5 angsty stars!!!
fsmeurinne's review
5.0
Well Holding on to Forever is a fitting title, as it hold me the whole time. Emily and Adam are a couple you will love. He is the quarterback trying to help his family. Emily is the coach's daughter but with a hidden secret. This book is like no other you have read in sport romance, the themes and topics presented are not for everyone but they are handled in the perfect way. I suggest you give it a go, this is a must read!
kiralillyy's review
5.0
So this one tackles a lot of hard topics. So good though so well-written it makes you really feel like you are the character. Emily and Adam have that type of love that most people look for. Emily story is tragic because of all the hardships that she had to deal with being a girl. An Adam is literally the man of the house he takes care of his mother and a sister eventually Emily. their love is certainly one of a kind this book has angst drama sex anything you can ask for it's also suspend soul and deals with real life topics that happen daily you won't be disappointed with this book
nikitaxx's review
5.0
This was seriously amazing! I absolutely loved everything about Adam and how he would do anything for the ones he loved!
He decides to start selling drugs to help out his family and that’s how he eventually meets Emily. Emily is the coach’s daughter and none of them expected to start having feelings for each other.
There is definitely love in this book but also alot of heartbreak! The emotions were real as hell and i felt as though i was feeling those things!
This seriously had my attention from beginning to end and I couldn’t put it down!
This definitely deserves a 5⭐️ and I totally recommend it!!
kiralillyy's review against another edition
5.0
So this one tackles a lot of hard topics. So good though so well-written it makes you really feel like you are the character. Emily and Adam have that type of love that most people look for. Emily story is tragic because of all the hardships that she had to deal with being a girl. An Adam is literally the man of the house he takes care of his mother and a sister eventually Emily. their love is certainly one of a kind this book has angst drama sex anything you can ask for it's also suspend soul and deals with real life topics that happen daily you won't be disappointed with this book
lowkeyreader's review against another edition
4.0
Having been read the author's previous book, this was so much heavier and more emotional as it deals with heavier topics.
Adam has deep commitment to his family. He will stop at nothing to take care of them. Even though he needs to be a dealer to pay for his sister's medical expenses and lighten his mother's burden. One thing he didn't expect is he would be dealing his coach's daughter, let alone she would also be someone so important to him. But when he falls for Emily, he does what he has done all his life, he protects what he loves. Having Adam and Emily find each other despite the unhealthy situations they found themselves in made the story all the more touching.
This book was unlike anything I have read before and can’t wait to read more from these amazing authors.
TRIGGER WARNING: This book contains some topics that may be triggering for some readers like sexual assault, drugs and alcohol abuse.
Adam has deep commitment to his family. He will stop at nothing to take care of them. Even though he needs to be a dealer to pay for his sister's medical expenses and lighten his mother's burden. One thing he didn't expect is he would be dealing his coach's daughter, let alone she would also be someone so important to him. But when he falls for Emily, he does what he has done all his life, he protects what he loves. Having Adam and Emily find each other despite the unhealthy situations they found themselves in made the story all the more touching.
This book was unlike anything I have read before and can’t wait to read more from these amazing authors.
TRIGGER WARNING: This book contains some topics that may be triggering for some readers like sexual assault, drugs and alcohol abuse.