huncamuncamouse's review against another edition
2.0
This is a hard one to review. 2.5 stars? I just wanted it to be so much better than it actually is.
Heather Havrilesky is clearly a good writer, and these essays show a real attention to craft in terms of how carefully they're structured and blend research with the personal. As much as I disliked this book, the essays challenged me and forced me to engage with their arguments. But that's part of the problem--the best essays are inquiries, not arguments. And consistently, I find Havrilesky is more concerned with making abstract, prescriptive proclamations about how we should live our lives without really justifying why she, of all people, has the authority to be dispensing the advice. This problem was never more apparent than in the "guru" section; without a trace of irony, Havrilesky critiques those who appear to have all the answers. Curious choice, coming from an advice columnist (and admittedly she does acknowledge this in a different, earlier essay) and given that this book's charge is intended to spark action in the reader.
The entire book's 200 pages could simplified with the following extract: "This pervasive, subconscious longing is the background noise generated by the new digital realm, like the terrible hiss and hum of an old refrigerator. And it affects all of us, even if the pain it causes is most visible in the young. It tells us that no matter what our circumstances might be, we should be dressing like fashion bloggers and vacationing like celebrities and eating like food critics and fucking like porn stars, and if we aren't, we're losers who are doomed to non-greatness forever and ever . . . . [t]here is no 'better version' of you waiting in the future. The best version of you is who you are right here, right now, in this fucked-up, impatient, imperfect sublime moment. Shut out the noise and enjoy exactly who are you are and what you have, right here, right now."
The problem is that there's nothing new in the slightest about this perspective. How many think pieces have been published on this very subject? Quite literally thousands. What sets this book apart from all the rest? In my estimation, not much. Here are just a few of Havrilesky's scorching hot and timely takes:
-Disney is artificial and packaged as a fantasy... the ultimate embodiment of capitalism geared to indoctrinate children as young as possible (this was so stale I felt embarrassed)
-social media is keeping us from being truly present and connected in meaningful ways
-capitalism leaves us all emotionally barren (hard agree, but again, come ON. also how much the advance from your fancy NY publisher?)
-foodies are annoying. (A massive oversight in this essay is that not all "foodies" want to eat foie gras and premium food items. Many of the greatest chefs and home cooks alike are returning to the dishes they grew up eating, many in poverty, making the most of limited resources and ingredients. This essay seemed to want to make a singular statement about foodies which revealed, perhaps, the author's own narrow world view).
-The Sopranos ushered in an era of anti-heroes on prestige TV (seriously; how many variations of this essay will be published? The show has been off the air for a decade)
I did, however, enjoy "The Smile Factory" and "To Infinity and Beyond." And "Haunted" started out so promisingly, but the thread of female-focused TV (Girls) and Shirley Jackson's work never came together to form a cogent argument, in what was perhaps the book's biggest disappointment.
As a whole, this book is didactic, repetitive, and unoriginal. Oh, and by the way, I saw her tweets about libraries and all I have to say is many thanks to my local library for saving me 26 dollars on this disappointing book!
Heather Havrilesky is clearly a good writer, and these essays show a real attention to craft in terms of how carefully they're structured and blend research with the personal. As much as I disliked this book, the essays challenged me and forced me to engage with their arguments. But that's part of the problem--the best essays are inquiries, not arguments. And consistently, I find Havrilesky is more concerned with making abstract, prescriptive proclamations about how we should live our lives without really justifying why she, of all people, has the authority to be dispensing the advice. This problem was never more apparent than in the "guru" section; without a trace of irony, Havrilesky critiques those who appear to have all the answers. Curious choice, coming from an advice columnist (and admittedly she does acknowledge this in a different, earlier essay) and given that this book's charge is intended to spark action in the reader.
The entire book's 200 pages could simplified with the following extract: "This pervasive, subconscious longing is the background noise generated by the new digital realm, like the terrible hiss and hum of an old refrigerator. And it affects all of us, even if the pain it causes is most visible in the young. It tells us that no matter what our circumstances might be, we should be dressing like fashion bloggers and vacationing like celebrities and eating like food critics and fucking like porn stars, and if we aren't, we're losers who are doomed to non-greatness forever and ever . . . . [t]here is no 'better version' of you waiting in the future. The best version of you is who you are right here, right now, in this fucked-up, impatient, imperfect sublime moment. Shut out the noise and enjoy exactly who are you are and what you have, right here, right now."
The problem is that there's nothing new in the slightest about this perspective. How many think pieces have been published on this very subject? Quite literally thousands. What sets this book apart from all the rest? In my estimation, not much. Here are just a few of Havrilesky's scorching hot and timely takes:
-Disney is artificial and packaged as a fantasy... the ultimate embodiment of capitalism geared to indoctrinate children as young as possible (this was so stale I felt embarrassed)
-social media is keeping us from being truly present and connected in meaningful ways
-capitalism leaves us all emotionally barren (hard agree, but again, come ON. also how much the advance from your fancy NY publisher?)
-foodies are annoying. (A massive oversight in this essay is that not all "foodies" want to eat foie gras and premium food items. Many of the greatest chefs and home cooks alike are returning to the dishes they grew up eating, many in poverty, making the most of limited resources and ingredients. This essay seemed to want to make a singular statement about foodies which revealed, perhaps, the author's own narrow world view).
-The Sopranos ushered in an era of anti-heroes on prestige TV (seriously; how many variations of this essay will be published? The show has been off the air for a decade)
I did, however, enjoy "The Smile Factory" and "To Infinity and Beyond." And "Haunted" started out so promisingly, but the thread of female-focused TV (Girls) and Shirley Jackson's work never came together to form a cogent argument, in what was perhaps the book's biggest disappointment.
As a whole, this book is didactic, repetitive, and unoriginal. Oh, and by the way, I saw her tweets about libraries and all I have to say is many thanks to my local library for saving me 26 dollars on this disappointing book!
christiek's review against another edition
Not for me. Or not what I thought it would be.
Listened to 50 minutes. Too bitter.
Listened to 50 minutes. Too bitter.
suzy's review against another edition
2.0
Didn't finish this one. I'd been anticipating this book for a hot minute, because I love a whole lot of her writing that I've seen appear elsewhere. . But after a few essays, I gave up. It's not surprising in hindsight that a lot of these draw experientially from heteronormative middle class white womandom, but even as a middle class white lady, a lot of it fell flat for me. Something about the structure of these felt a bit forced, and maybe I've reached a point in life where I've already filled my quota of takes about how 50 Shades is really about consumer culture.
discoveringpeace's review against another edition
1.0
DNF
Rough. Terrible writing. Trying too hard with too little takeaway.
Rough. Terrible writing. Trying too hard with too little takeaway.
editrix's review against another edition
These pieces were hit and miss for me, and a lot of them felt like nothing more than observation, without any of the personal reflection or critical analysis that would make them valuable. The topics she covers are all interesting and worthy, but too often it seemed like her end points were the same places where better essays/essayists would jump off from into deeper waters.
plusque's review against another edition
5.0
There is something about her writing that makes me feel calm and think more. It's almost easy to read, in the sense that I read it fast because I liked it, but also clever and smart but never talking down.
autumn_dannay's review against another edition
4.0
This essay collection challenged modern American culture, proposing: what if this were enough?
I found that I agreed with Havrilesky on the majority of the subjects she touches on in her book. It is full of good advice, especially if you begin to read between the lines. Fortunately, the author does not have a bloated ego, so she speaks frankly about the nature of her life & experiences without sounding condescending. In fact, the majority of this book reads as if you are sharing a conversation with Havrilesky rather than listening to a lecture.
This book is good. Read it, let it make you think.
I found that I agreed with Havrilesky on the majority of the subjects she touches on in her book. It is full of good advice, especially if you begin to read between the lines. Fortunately, the author does not have a bloated ego, so she speaks frankly about the nature of her life & experiences without sounding condescending. In fact, the majority of this book reads as if you are sharing a conversation with Havrilesky rather than listening to a lecture.
This book is good. Read it, let it make you think.
ejmiddleton's review against another edition
4.0
This was the perfect accompaniment to strep - I knew I was getting better when I wanted to underline something and send it to people.