Reviews
Love, InshAllah: The Secret Love Lives of American Muslim Women by Nura Maznavi, Ayesha Mattu
jbdunn's review
5.0
I have truly enjoyed reading this book. It includes essays from American Muslim women writers on their perspectives and experiences on love in all stages. Not only have I been engrossed in the stories, I have also found a few new writers to follow.
esquiredtoread's review
3.0
2.5 stars. Rounded up. Some of these stories were good, some focused less on the Muslim part and more on the immigrant part. The title was a bit misleading. It definitely, mostly, is a story about immigrants of conservative parents and finding their own footing. I had similar parents but couldn’t relate to many of these stories. Also—although many tried to make their stories about religion and love it was primarily about lust which is just not what I was looking for and not what I thought this book would be.
Some of the more powerful stories encouraged me to round it up, and I do think this would have benefited from being less stories and more length to the stories they did choose.
Some of the more powerful stories encouraged me to round it up, and I do think this would have benefited from being less stories and more length to the stories they did choose.
fyoosha's review
4.0
Obviously I liked this book, given that I finished it in two days. Some stories were definitely better than others. But here's a passage that nearly made me cry:
"The first time I realize I don't have to keep my secret, I am drinking a peppermint mocha and trying not to cry. For fifteen years, I have been afraid there is not enough room in my parents' hearts, in my family, my Iran, or my religion, for my truth. I am no longer the little girl hiding in the closet. Who knew how elastic parents could be? How they could wrap around the largest letdown? Perhaps the rest, too, has more stretch. Perhaps someday, I think, I will, with my own full shape, fit into all the spaces that seem, at first glance, too small for me."
Many of the stories in this book felt so personal to me, but it was this one passage that really hit home. In that vein, I do wish there had been more stories about queer women. That's what I had expected when I started reading this book.
"The first time I realize I don't have to keep my secret, I am drinking a peppermint mocha and trying not to cry. For fifteen years, I have been afraid there is not enough room in my parents' hearts, in my family, my Iran, or my religion, for my truth. I am no longer the little girl hiding in the closet. Who knew how elastic parents could be? How they could wrap around the largest letdown? Perhaps the rest, too, has more stretch. Perhaps someday, I think, I will, with my own full shape, fit into all the spaces that seem, at first glance, too small for me."
Many of the stories in this book felt so personal to me, but it was this one passage that really hit home. In that vein, I do wish there had been more stories about queer women. That's what I had expected when I started reading this book.
northstar's review
4.0
I read this for my Jewish and Muslim women's book club. The writing was uneven and some of the essays dragged but for the most part I enjoyed the variety of voices. I learned a lot about Muslim dating and marriage customs from different parts of the world.
fatimashah's review
4.0
I think this is a must read for our Muslim communities, its open honest and transparent and I thoroughly enjoyed it.
mutmainah's review
2.0
I hate to say this about the real lives of real people but the vast majority of the stories in this collection were thoroughly underwhelming. Add to that the fact that the editors somehow managed to erase any remnants of individual voices (in a book that was meant to combat the erasure of Muslim women) and this was just not for me.
nonfirqtion's review
2.0
When I first heard about “Love, InshAllah: The Secret Love Lives of American Muslim Women”, I became extremely curious about it! Woooo! Muslim women talking about their secret love life! Will there be sex? Will there be forbidden love? Will the stories portray Muslim women as normal women who seek intimacy and respect from their own partners?
Instead, the anthology disappointed me.
The book was meant to lift the veil on Muslim women, so I expected more stories that went against the grain of the “good” Muslim. I thought there was going to be more stories about perhaps LGBTQ+ Muslims who struggle with their sexuality and faith, or maybe the trans community. Instead, we only get 1 essay about a lesbian hijabi, who fell in love with a married niqabi (you have to read her story; it was really good and sad). Another story that stood out for me was Aida Rahim’s essay. It was how she met her husband, a liberal, progressive Muslim. Even though they were both Muslims, the way they practiced faith differently became an issue for her. She knew Islam through rule-based doctrine and rituals. While her fiancé was perhaps much more liberal. This was interesting, because it seemed like even within the same faith, faith was still a problem.
The other essays were also about women who struggled with faith in their marriage, perhaps meeting a non-muslim, but at the end of the day the non-muslim always converts. Islam or God somehow comes in to save the day, but it’s not always this way in real life. Non-muslims and muslims do get married, and they do lead a happy marriage together. Also, what about intra-faith marriages between shia and sunnis? Is this an issue in America? I did not feel that the book lifted the veil on Muslim women, enough. There was an essay that promoted and romanticized polygamy… And this clearly did not sit well with me, there are many issues with polygamy and how it has dehumanized many women and broken families as well. A story should be written on that to accompany the polygamy essay. I just wished that there were more essays by the marginalized community, or the “bad” Muslim woman. .
Instead, the anthology disappointed me.
The book was meant to lift the veil on Muslim women, so I expected more stories that went against the grain of the “good” Muslim. I thought there was going to be more stories about perhaps LGBTQ+ Muslims who struggle with their sexuality and faith, or maybe the trans community. Instead, we only get 1 essay about a lesbian hijabi, who fell in love with a married niqabi (you have to read her story; it was really good and sad). Another story that stood out for me was Aida Rahim’s essay. It was how she met her husband, a liberal, progressive Muslim. Even though they were both Muslims, the way they practiced faith differently became an issue for her. She knew Islam through rule-based doctrine and rituals. While her fiancé was perhaps much more liberal. This was interesting, because it seemed like even within the same faith, faith was still a problem.
The other essays were also about women who struggled with faith in their marriage, perhaps meeting a non-muslim, but at the end of the day the non-muslim always converts. Islam or God somehow comes in to save the day, but it’s not always this way in real life. Non-muslims and muslims do get married, and they do lead a happy marriage together. Also, what about intra-faith marriages between shia and sunnis? Is this an issue in America? I did not feel that the book lifted the veil on Muslim women, enough. There was an essay that promoted and romanticized polygamy… And this clearly did not sit well with me, there are many issues with polygamy and how it has dehumanized many women and broken families as well. A story should be written on that to accompany the polygamy essay. I just wished that there were more essays by the marginalized community, or the “bad” Muslim woman. .
More...