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Reviews tagging 'Self harm'
Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke by Eric LaRocca
259 reviews
pryingblackbird's review against another edition
dark
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
1.0
There were some interesting idea in here, but the execution was horrible. Also a book isn't automatically diverse or LGBT just because some of the characters are in same sex relationships, when all of the characters are just blank, flat stand-ins to progress whatever little plot there is. Yes there's two same sex couples in the book, but they might as well be hetero or completely devoid of a gender identity, it would not influence the stories even the slightest.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty, Animal death, and Miscarriage
Moderate: Mental illness and Self harm
cat_astrophicallybookish's review against another edition
dark
mysterious
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Emotional abuse, Self harm, Suicide, and Gaslighting
jiobiee's review against another edition
dark
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
OVERALL: 7.8/10, or 3.9/5
A deeply disturbing short story. I'm not sure if I should've been the person to read this, knowing now where this goes, but Eric LaRocca's intricate, repugnant prose makes my stomach churn and has embedded itself into the darkest corners of my mind. This is not a work for everyone.
Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke, told through emails and instant messages in early 2000's chatrooms, follows two lesbians who enter a romantic and sexual... arrangement.Agnes posts on an LGBT forum trying to sell her antique apple peeler, which may or may not have been touched by some famous old composer, when Zoe reaches out to her with the intent of buying. After learning about her financial and personal troubles, Zoe sends Agnes enough money to cover a couple months' of rent, and suggests that they should enter a slave/master relationship. She agrees, and Agnes is at the behest of Zoe's every whim- even when they become exponentially more depraved. She reaches a breaking point, once, but soon realizes she craves Zoe's approval more than she feels shame about her actions.
I need to address some points mentioned by other reviewers, because as a queer person myself, who has been in queer relationships and despite all appearances continues to be queer, I am deeply uncomfortable by the casual transphobia that runs rampant on this page. The author is, in some way that they are comfortable with defining, nonbinary. Perhaps LaRocca has no issue presenting themselves as masculine- that's fine! But to assume and double down that the author is a cis man when it isn't difficult to see that they aren't, is despicable. Or, perhaps it's only convenient to recognize nonbinary folk when you can infantilize them or use them to further your own narrative. Whatever the case may be, a lot of people have proven to me that they are not the pillars of LGBT+ community or allyship that they claim to be.
I also take issue with the blatant dismissal of the themes and content of the story by labeling it as "offensive trauma porn" and nothing more. We should not limit our community to only indulging in spineless, gutless fluff. Not that the fluff doesn't have it's own value, but queer people are not here to be precious perfect little babies. I am sick and so, very tired, of people trying to sanitize queer content; we are not allowed to bare our souls, tell meaningful stories, or present in any way that shows any ugly bits of humanity. And beyond any of the actual disturbing content- yes, fictional lesbians are allowed to jump into abusive relationships- many real lesbians do!
Which, isn't to say that this work doesn't deserve criticism. It does. Any criticism Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke has gotten, from a narrative, literary standpoint does not bother me in the slightest.
My biggest gripe is that Zoe and Agnes do not have their own distinct voices. I can get past these two texting in the most flowery prose I've ever seen come up in casual conversation (mainly because I have been known to talk like an asshole at times, lol), but unfortunately these two characters feel like they're the same person. I don't think the inclusion of the police report as a means to transition into the story was necessary; it would read just fine without it.You wouldn't need to tell us that Agnes is dead to know that she is. Some people take issue with the BDSM themes, viewing it under a critical queer eye, and frankly, to an extent I do agree. It isn't representative of kink. Where I differ, though, is that I don't think the intent was to be representative of kink.I just think Zoe's kind of a freak. Agnes, too, by the end of the story. I don't take issue with the Agnes' wish to carry a child as a queer person, personally. I am someone who is utterly disgusted, repulsed, and terrified of motherhood and the thought of carrying life within me makes me want to vomit. I hate it. It's the reason why I say that I'm not sure I am the right person to read something like this. But, I'm not every queer person, and I'm certainly not every lesbian- lesbians who want children and want to carry their children do exist. I don't think it's that wild or crazy of an idea, and I didn't pick up on any notion that LaRocca feels like all women feel a pull to motherhood.
Some people said that Agnes and Zoe follow a logic that doesn't make any sense. I disagree. Just because you or I would never jump to any of those same conclusions, does not mean that no one does. Fiction would be boring if people acted purely logically all the time.
There's a sickening sense of impending doom in every word on these pages. There was never a moment where this story didn't feel tense. I think the most chilling part about it, to me, was how wholeheartedly devoted Agnes was to Zoe,to the point of obsession. It is a painfully obvious metaphor, to me, that their relationship is supposed to represent this sort of fucked-up progression of toxic relationships. Agnes, broken by her parent's decision to disown her two years ago, broke, and with an almost non-existent support system, becomes susceptible to Zoe's manipulation. Zoe is a sick individual. She realizes this. Her need to get off on having power over Agnes outweighs her desire not to hurt people. Agnes begins to change every aspect of herself to serve Zoe, and obsesses over her, her relationship with her, and her parasite- her "child"- even when Zoe decides that they both have gone too far. Agnes' obsession has grown to such a point that no semblance of identity is left- just the corpse of the parasite remains. I know people that act like either Zoe or Agnes. They are just as vile. And that is deeply, deeply disturbing.
If any of the subject matter sounds interesting to you, then I would say it is worth a read. Please come to your own conclusions. And again, this story is not for everyone.
A deeply disturbing short story. I'm not sure if I should've been the person to read this, knowing now where this goes, but Eric LaRocca's intricate, repugnant prose makes my stomach churn and has embedded itself into the darkest corners of my mind. This is not a work for everyone.
Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke, told through emails and instant messages in early 2000's chatrooms, follows two lesbians who enter a romantic and sexual... arrangement.
I need to address some points mentioned by other reviewers, because as a queer person myself, who has been in queer relationships and despite all appearances continues to be queer, I am deeply uncomfortable by the casual transphobia that runs rampant on this page. The author is, in some way that they are comfortable with defining, nonbinary. Perhaps LaRocca has no issue presenting themselves as masculine- that's fine! But to assume and double down that the author is a cis man when it isn't difficult to see that they aren't, is despicable. Or, perhaps it's only convenient to recognize nonbinary folk when you can infantilize them or use them to further your own narrative. Whatever the case may be, a lot of people have proven to me that they are not the pillars of LGBT+ community or allyship that they claim to be.
I also take issue with the blatant dismissal of the themes and content of the story by labeling it as "offensive trauma porn" and nothing more. We should not limit our community to only indulging in spineless, gutless fluff. Not that the fluff doesn't have it's own value, but queer people are not here to be precious perfect little babies. I am sick and so, very tired, of people trying to sanitize queer content; we are not allowed to bare our souls, tell meaningful stories, or present in any way that shows any ugly bits of humanity. And beyond any of the actual disturbing content- yes, fictional lesbians are allowed to jump into abusive relationships- many real lesbians do!
Which, isn't to say that this work doesn't deserve criticism. It does. Any criticism Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke has gotten, from a narrative, literary standpoint does not bother me in the slightest.
My biggest gripe is that Zoe and Agnes do not have their own distinct voices. I can get past these two texting in the most flowery prose I've ever seen come up in casual conversation (mainly because I have been known to talk like an asshole at times, lol), but unfortunately these two characters feel like they're the same person. I don't think the inclusion of the police report as a means to transition into the story was necessary; it would read just fine without it.
Some people said that Agnes and Zoe follow a logic that doesn't make any sense. I disagree. Just because you or I would never jump to any of those same conclusions, does not mean that no one does. Fiction would be boring if people acted purely logically all the time.
There's a sickening sense of impending doom in every word on these pages. There was never a moment where this story didn't feel tense. I think the most chilling part about it, to me, was how wholeheartedly devoted Agnes was to Zoe,
If any of the subject matter sounds interesting to you, then I would say it is worth a read. Please come to your own conclusions. And again, this story is not for everyone.
"What have you done today to deserve your eyes?"
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal death, Body horror, Death, Gore, Self harm, Sexual content, Suicide, Toxic relationship, and Pregnancy
Moderate: Mental illness
Minor: Homophobia and Lesbophobia
clovetra's review against another edition
challenging
dark
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
i’m sitting here cackling because what in the actual fuck did i just read. i’m crying from laughter right here. does that say something deeper about my psyche at the moment? probably. was this incredibly silly goofy? yes!!!!!
my only real gripe is this is solely related to one of my triggers. now i’m fine with gore in my horror. hell i’ll watch horror movies with gore. but you bring bugs into My Horror??????? ohh i lose my mind. bugs have always been an insane trigger for me. i am always afraid bugs are in my ears. i was told once that biting your nails gives you pinworms and as a girlie with dermatillomania i had a panic attack over that thought. once i woke up in my bed to an earwig next to me and now i am always paranoid ill wake up and an earwig is in my bed. needless to say, a bitch doesn’t like bugs!!!!! so i’ll say this book really did have me!!!!!
i don’t know what you’d call this book but it wasn’t really… horror? idk i’d say it’s more like psychological thriller. but also i realise im incredibly desensitised to weird shit so.
i wish there was more time to expand on the fucked up relationship between these two but also this is a novella so. i’m not mad.
the ending is lowkey kinda funny? not funny haha funny goofy. i liked the way the ending brought us all the way to the beginning as well. nice little tie in.
i feel like im going to be severely judged for actually saying i had a good time. i cant say i enjoyed myself but lowkey i don’t think that’s the point. i had a good time. i felt like agnes reading this — enjoying it but not really but kind of but hating it but loving it. yeah. this isn’t a book ur meant to love. it’s so fuckjng insane. but i liked it! i’m not mad at it! i can also understand why everyone i know of either thinks this is mediocre or horrible! i am in the minority! long live the apple peeler and finneas!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Self harm, Toxic relationship, and Pregnancy
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Gore, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Vomit, and Medical content
Minor: Homophobia
joeywins's review against another edition
dark
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.25
Well, its morbid and that is what I was looking for.
This felt like it needed another draft or some longer time to brew. The concept is very appealing to me- unconventional relationship that turns to horror done with early internet culture.
Nothing is built up though, I have no idea who these women are- if you told me it was the same woman talking to herself i would believe it because there is no character! I cannot describe them beyond their roles in the story.
It seems everything that happens serves to just give us some graphic imagery. Yes its done well, but that doesn't make a story. I just keep asking myself why do this if you're not going to commit? Don't give me unrelated stories that kind of thematically connect, give me what you said you would provide. Aughhhh!!!
I read it in less than a day, so I'm not too frustrated, but I wish this was better than it was. Thought this was going to be a 5 star, ended with me shrugging my shoulders.
This felt like it needed another draft or some longer time to brew. The concept is very appealing to me- unconventional relationship that turns to horror done with early internet culture.
Nothing is built up though, I have no idea who these women are- if you told me it was the same woman talking to herself i would believe it because there is no character! I cannot describe them beyond their roles in the story.
It seems everything that happens serves to just give us some graphic imagery. Yes its done well, but that doesn't make a story. I just keep asking myself why do this if you're not going to commit? Don't give me unrelated stories that kind of thematically connect, give me what you said you would provide. Aughhhh!!!
I read it in less than a day, so I'm not too frustrated, but I wish this was better than it was. Thought this was going to be a 5 star, ended with me shrugging my shoulders.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Child abuse, Child death, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Self harm and Pregnancy
Minor: Homophobia, Vomit, and Lesbophobia
toadscreams's review against another edition
dark
emotional
sad
tense
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty, Emotional abuse, Gore, Self harm, Sexual content, Torture, Toxic relationship, and Blood
noczombie's review against another edition
challenging
dark
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness, Miscarriage, Self harm, Suicide, and Toxic relationship
calhudak's review against another edition
dark
mysterious
sad
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Child death, Death, Emotional abuse, Gore, Mental illness, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Violence, Toxic friendship, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Bullying, Self harm, Religious bigotry, and Schizophrenia/Psychosis
Minor: Body horror, Infertility, and Racism
avajlw's review against another edition
challenging
dark
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
i really wanted to like it, read it in two short sittings. unfortunately we didnt really get to see any character depth. it felt rushed and that it relied more heavily on shock value and visceral descriptions of gore than complex horror
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Body horror, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Self harm, Suicide, Medical content, Pregnancy, Lesbophobia, and Injury/Injury detail
marcostorin's review against another edition
challenging
dark
sad
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? N/A
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Body horror, Child abuse, Child death, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gore, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Self harm, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Pregnancy, Abandonment, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Sexual content and Kidnapping