Reviews

獨舞 by 李琴峰

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femmefatigue's review against another edition

4.0

I love reading books by women who've suffered from depression, mostly because I think it normalises a lot of my own thoughts and experiences, and I think it's the poignant but achingly relatable descriptions of depression and trauma in this book that make me give it a 4 stars.

This book is extremely emotional, and readers should be aware that there is a lot of triggering content in this relating to death, suicide, and rape.

I deeply related with so much of the content in this novel, being a lesbian who's also suffered with depression, and some of her descriptions of the physical sensations that come with being depressed are so beautifully poetic.

My only real criticism of this book would be the ending - **spoilers ahead** so stop here if necessary.
***The book is largely about a woman who is planning to kill herself, and she goes on a trip around the world beforehand where she meets different people with different stories that influence the way she sees the world. Now the first part of the book explains the woman's life (growing up as a lesbian in Taiwan at a time when LGBT visibility was a lot more scarce, her violent sexual assault, her previous relationships, and what leads her to finally make up her mind on killing herself), and then the end of the book consists of her trips, and the people she meets, and I cannot stress enough how beautifully the author handles all of this content.
However, my problem comes in at the very end of the book, when the protagonist reaches her final destination, the place where she plans to commit suicide, and is more-or-less saved by her ex-partner and friends from her 'old life' in Taiwan. Now, ignoring the fact that they were miraculously in the right place at the right time, my problem is that as she wakes up to see them in the hospital bed, they essentially 'convince her' out of her depression and suicidal ideation, and it just felt off. As someone whose also lived with suicidal ideation most of her life, I can fairly confidently say that you can't be convinced out of it in a single conversation. Teaching someone to value their own life is something that takes a considerable amount of time to achieve and in many cases may not even be possible. Essentially saying "No, you were so loved all this time" is just not a convincing argument to stop someone from being depressed, or from wanting to kill themselves.
If I'm honest, having tried to write about depression before myself as well, I got the impression that the author didn't know how to finish the story maybe because those feelings haven't been resolved yet for herself either? I could be wrong, but it just felt like an unrealistic, feel-good ending was shoe-horned into the ending of the book because the author wasn't sure how to end it. ****

However, I do want to caveat that criticism by reiterating how utterly beautiful and well-written the rest of this book was. Reiji Morris' simple prose really lend themselves well to the subject matter. If you suffer or have suffered with suicidal ideation yourself, it really is a great book because you feel so seen in the ways that the protagonist thinks about life and death and how she deals with and describes her depression. It's poetic, relatable, and deeply moving as a novel, and even despite the odd choice of ending, I'd still recommend it to anyone interested in queer Asian literature, Taiwanese culture, and female depression.

boochipho's review against another edition

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challenging emotional inspiring reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

sadbean's review against another edition

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dark emotional reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Interesting read about the inner thoughts of a suicidal lgbt Asian woman living in conservative East Asian societies. The ending where

xiaoxue and xiaozhu show u to save her is kind of random and cheapened it for me

Content Warnings

rebeccazh's review against another edition

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4.0

A quick but not easy read. Solo Dance is about the traumatic life of a queer Chinese-Japanese woman, Cho Norie/Zhao Yingmei. Born in Taiwan, she knew since a young age that she was different. Her first crush died in the 1999 earthquake and with no way to acknowledge it or talk about it, she becomes obsessed with death. She studies literature in a Taiwanese university and a series of events happens that causes her to escape Taiwan to start afresh in Japan. But soon, her past catches up with her. The novella starts with the present and fills us in on her past via flashbacks.

Arthur Reiji Morris' translation is fluid and lyrical, and I've highlighted quite a few passages. This story deals with very heavy topics like sexual assault motivated by lesbophobia, suicide, depression, and PTSD.

Cho's life is marked by loneliness and pain. She's othered and silenced by her sexuality and ostracized by victim blaming. It's notable that she's barely even named in her own story. The depths of her suffering, alienation, and pain remind me of some of the queer people I know who struggle deeply with mental illness & trauma. It's painful to see how she has few caring relationships and even lesser positive experiences of life. I wished I could protect her. And, as Joy's review points out, young queer Asians have limited literary narratives they can draw strength from; I was very anxious that the narrative would end with her taking her life, similar to the many tragic queer authors she admires, but thankfully there is a somewhat awkwardly written plot twist (that almost reads like a dream).

Special note on the title and cover - the cover shows a skewered bird and references the thorn bird, an image that appears multiple times in the story, and the title refers to the lonely dance that Cho is forced to live.