Reviews with content warning for Racism - Someday, Maybe

Reviews tagging 'Racism'

Someday, Maybe by Onyi Nwabineli

31 reviews

theinstabookworm's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

First and foremost, if you have been impacted by suicide, approach this book with caution, or maybe skip it.

I've had this book on my shelf for a year and a half. I got in in my Book of the Month box the same month Stephen 'tWitch' Boss died by suicide, but it was too soon to read it then. I've tried to pick it up a few times over the past 18 months, but it's never been the right time. Until now, I guess.

Although I've never lost someone to suicide, I have lost a loved one young (20s) suddenly and unexpectedly. The way Eve's family and friends wanted to be sympathetic, but didn't truly understand her grief, was accurate to when someone dies young. I've also seen how relatives can act like Quentin's mother did and place blame and then how messy things can get when trying to go through the legal process. Grief makes people act in unpredictable ways.

This story was confronting and detailed. The way Quentin took his own life was never specified, but it is alluded to later in the book and the author doesn't hold back. The way feelings of guilt and shame were described added another layer to this story because I think loved ones do blame themselves for missing the signs that their person was struggling. For the most part, I loved Eve's family and friends because even though they didn't understand what she was going through, they still showed up for her in their imperfect, yet consistent, ways.

I regretted that I didn't annotate this from the beginning and have gone back and annotated the lines and quotes that spoke to me. The writing throughout this whole book was beautiful. I'm glad I finally picked this up and stuck with it.

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lisettemarie's review against another edition

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challenging emotional reflective sad

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jo_d's review against another edition

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emotional reflective sad tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

This book tore out my heart in the best way possible. Nwabineli does a wonderful job showing grief in all its ugly, selfish ways. How it breaks everything and how people handle it differently. The unreliable narrator in that the narrator herself is grieving, but seeing the shift and growth in that is eye opening, heart wrenching, and so painfully, beautifully human.
A book I would recommend to anyone

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teacupsandfirereads's review against another edition

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emotional reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.5

This was not what I expected, but I am not sure how or why. This was presented in a way that makes a hard topic readable. I do think it was done well, but still felt the writing was lacking and felt juvenile in some sense. I didn't liked the main characters in parts, but I also understood her. Overall, I didn't connect with the book the way I wanted to.

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suzquinn97's review against another edition

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dark emotional reflective sad slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

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ttnnllrr's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.5

This book is about our main character, Eve, and her life after discovering her husband’s dead body after he took his own life on New Year’s Eve. Nwabineli really shows the reader the true, raw grief of losing a loved one, in ways I’ve never seen before. It’s horrible, awful, and gut wrenching, but so incredibly insightful into one of many ways grief can transform us.

At the beginning of the book, Eve spends much of her time in bed and the rest throwing up in the toilet. She binge drinks and takes pills to keep her from the waking world, only to be haunted with nightmares about her husband Q, and her guilt for being unable to save him.
We witness a loving, close knit family surrounding and supporting Eve every step of the way, no matter how many times she tries to push them away or cling too close.

Eve’s mother in law, Aspen, who had already shown hatred for her simply because she is Nigerian and not the ‘rich white girl’ Aspen always wanted Q to marry, blames Q’s death on Eve and will not rest until what remains of Eve’s life is set aflame.

Then, everything changes.

Eve gets in an accident and discovers that she is pregnant with Q’s baby. She must now come to terms with her future as a widow and a single mother, and get her shit together for her kid.

This book was hard to read at times, the grief truly just oozed off the page and Eve’s decision were sometimes hard to get behind. Another reason was the fighting between Eve and her sister, Gloria, because while I understand, I also don’t know how you get mad at someone who had just lost the love of their life to something so brutal as suicide. Like I said, it was frustrating at times, but I also think that’s what makes it a great representation of grief. It’s never meant to be light and easy, it’s hard and ugly and at times violent.

I really appreciated the ending as well, because while it’s not quite a happy ending, per se, it’s clear that it’s headed in that direction at a realistic pace.

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andreamichelle's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

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thecriticalreader's review against another edition

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emotional sad slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Review:

Someday, Maybe by Onyi Nwabineli is a novel about grief. Full stop. After the unexpected death of her husband by suicide, Eve must grieve without closure and deal with a mother-in-law from hell who blames her for her son’s death. Nwabineli unflinchingly confronts the ugly, terrifying, messiness of grief head-on. Eve does not respond to her loss with dignity or strength—she careens into a bottomless pit of despair and does not begin to crawl out of it for months. She self-destructs and pulls everyone around her, including the reader, into the vortex of her pain. The result is a book that is excruciating to read; Eve’s pain is raw and unrelenting, and it’s hard not to become frustrated with her as she utterly fails to take responsibility for herself and behaves selfishly toward her friends and family. For some readers, Eve’s privilege might make her an unlikable or unrelatable character. After all, she shows little gratitude for her Herculean familial support system and the financial security that allows her to quit her job. However, in giving Eve access to anything that a grieving person could possibly need, Nwabineli underscores the way that grief is an inherently destructive force, even in cases of extraordinary privilege.

Someday, Maybe is a well-written debut that deftly traverses moments of heart, humor, and heartbreak. The book is illuminated by its rich cast of characters that make up Eve’s British Nigerian family and her friends, all of whom display strength and compassion in their own ways. One only wishes that the vibrancy with which Nwabineli constructs these side characters and their relationships carried over to Eve and her dead husband, Quentin. Despite the fact that the book is ostensibly dedicated to these two characters and their marriage, something about these two never quite feels authentic—almost like a rom-com relationship peppered with hinted moments of darkness rather than a realistic romantic relationship. The novel does an incredible job painting a portrait of grief and a British Nigerian family, but its inability to paint a strong enough portrait of its main character and her husband prevent it from reaching the level of a masterpiece.

The Run-Down:

****PLEASE READ TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR THIS BOOK!***

michelle_my_belle's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional funny hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.25

From the very beginning, this book hits you with the harsh realities of grief and it just keeps it up. I loved how real and raw the emotions and thoughts were as well as the sprinkling in of humor. I listened to this on audio and the narrator was fantastic. There were a few points when the characters' actions didn't really make sense to me, or just didn't sit right. Overall, a very good read.

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tlaynejones's review against another edition

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dark emotional funny hopeful sad medium-paced

Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes

5.0

The best book I’ve listened to this year. Warm, messy as hell, funny, so searingly sad, honest. This is a story about grief and love. I don’t know if I would have started it if I’d realised just how foundational grief is to the story, but I’m very glad I did. Nwabineli has written about a Nigerian British woman in her early 30s, who had, she thought, been happily married for the last 10years. But then she discovered her husband had died by suicide. The story takes place during the first months after this devastating event. I found the story to include enough balance to make the book compelling and enjoyable. Ugh enjoyable feels crass, considering the topic. I enjoyed getting to know Eve and her family, I found the process of grief, as it’s described in the book, challenged me and made me think, and I enjoyed discovering a new author to look out for. Obviously the grief and loss are a lot, and the specific mind fuck for loved ones coming to terms with a suicide is a lot. With that caution in mind, this is highly recommended.

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