Reviews with content warning for Murder - Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don't Know

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Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don't Know by Malcolm Gladwell

29 reviews

waterbear0821's review against another edition

challenging dark informative reflective fast-paced

3.25

This was good and interesting but oh-so-bleak and the whole dang book should be a trigger warning. The impetus for the book was the author’s preoccupation with the death of Sandra Bland, and he goes about describing the worst results of every betrayal that can be perpetrated and every misunderstanding humans can have, starting with Hitler and not getting any more upbeat from there. Learning about spies and con men is interesting but it leaves me feeling wrung out. And the rest of the book was even more disgusting and heartbreaking. It’s interesting to be sure. But did I learn anything I can apply to my life? Maybe this was a fitting opus for Sandra Bland’s horrible and needless death. Human beings are the worst.

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sabrielsbell's review against another edition

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challenging emotional

4.0

I listened to this on audiobook and really liked the narrators. Some things I enjoyed about this book was the narrative aspects and the dig into current and historical events that dealt with miscommunication. I also liked the way the author slowly added on to the concept he was presenting.

There were a few things that kept me from giving it a five star rating. Mainly, there were several incredibly hard topics that were used to illustrate a point in the book which I did not mind. However, I think the author could have done a better job making sure the reader knew his stance on some of these cases. For example, Brock Turner and his assault is one of the cases. The author uses this story to illustrate the negative roles of alcohol in relation to stranger interactions. I wish the author had also made it clear that Brock Turner was wrong regardless of the alcohol. He does call the assault tragic, horrible etc. and discusses the ruling by the court and why it went the way it did. But, at times it felt that the author was rationalizing Brock's actions instead of using it to make a point. However, after listening to the whole book, I don't think the author was in any way siding with Brock or any of the "bad" people discussed. If the author had been more clear though I think this would be a book I recommended to more people.

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ammmiiiii's review against another edition

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informative reflective sad fast-paced

3.75

A well-written societal commentary spanning a range of topics which converge on the simple fact that we still do not know how to talk to strangers.

A significant drawback to this book is its exploration of the Chanel Miller/Brock Turner rape case. Here, Gladwell implies that alcohol was the cause, when in fact the blame lies squarely on Brock Turner for choosing to rape an unconscious female.

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readingthief's review against another edition

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informative fast-paced

4.25

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rdesanto's review against another edition

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challenging informative reflective medium-paced

4.0

This was a difficult read because of the challenging topics presented. However, it was most insightful and tactfully presented in line with all his other books. I will definitely be reflecting on the information presented for a long time.

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laurennicolpies's review against another edition

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challenging informative reflective fast-paced

3.0

very interesting and a fast read for me but i can’t help but feel uncomfortable with some of the victim blaming sentiments i got from certain passages, specifically in the brock turner r*pe case and the penn state p*do and molestation chapters. i liked the overall sentiment of not assuming things about other people and really enjoyed the discussion about coupling in regards to s*icides, but some conclusions he drew made me uncomfortable and frankly a little angry.

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easta98's review against another edition

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dark emotional informative tense medium-paced

4.0

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cartermon4's review against another edition

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challenging emotional informative reflective slow-paced

4.5

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christcore's review against another edition

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3.0

Vaguely interesting, but meandering message throughout. Not sure what the thread he was trying to follow was. It was a nicely produced audiobook with actual audio from sources whenever he quoted someone else, but overall not something I'd recommend. Definitely check trigger warnings before reading.

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antireading's review against another edition

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1.25

I feel as though Gladwell ignores other factors to the discussions he brings up, most especially race, gender, and their intersections. He drills down everything to miscommunication but doesn't bring up the fact that many are predisposed to not wanting to be truthful in communication with women, with Black people, etc. It is not JUST because of policing practices that Black people get pulled over, but it is because of a bias against them and the communities that are over-policed. It felt like he was oversimplifying a lot.

The section on Jerry Sandusky and Brock Turner was gross. He treated CIA operatives who invented torture tactics with more care than victims of rape. He seemed to outright disbelieve the victims of Sandusky and chalk up Turner's rape to a "miscommunication" due to alcohol. He calls most sexual harassment on college campuses miscommunications due to alcohol and hazy rules of consent, while also acknowledging that 1 in 5 female college students report being sexually harassed. He also says the problem is equally with the men raping and the alcohol. Alcohol is a large chunk of the book for no apparent reason as it doesn't tie into the main Sandra Bland storyline like other issues do at the end. I wasn't interested in hearing excuses for a man raping an unconscious woman, but apparently, women should have known better.

The medium of an audiobook was interesting as Gladwell aimed to make it a high-quality podcast. That fell short when I had issues understanding snippets of the audio from various types of recording equipment, age of recordings, accents, and speeds of talking. I found myself just drowning out those snippets, especially when listening in the car, as the jumpiness of quality was too distracting. I feel like the description, while it technically does describe what happened, didn't really feel like the book as I was getting into it. It was very much interconnected stories but I thought those points would be briefly brought up, not dedicating whole chapters to it.

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