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Reviews tagging 'Child abuse'
How to Be Ace: A Memoir of Growing Up Asexual by Rebecca Burgess
3 reviews
gemstonejasper's review against another edition
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
3.75
Great memoir about growing up ace (and with OCD and a severe phobia, which I didn't expect). I recommend it to anyone who feels like they are different but don't know why. Overall, I think this book does a good job demonstrating why diversity is so crucial in media, especially media targeted toward kids. She perfectly describes the feeling of not having words to describe your experience and the only people in media that represent this aspect of you are sociopaths and serial killers. She also describes how she felt the first time she saw this part of herself represented in the media and how more representation will lead to more education and more accepting societies. Anyway, it was a great, fairly quick read
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual content, and Acephobia/Arophobia
Minor: Child abuse, Cursing, Domestic abuse, Gun violence, and Sexual harassment
emily_mh's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
4.25
I liked the art style of this one and the memoir narrative. It was also intensely relatable for me personally. However, there was something missing and I can’t quite put my finger on it. It might be that the premise is framed as coming to terms with your asexuality, when in reality it focusses more on discovering your asexuality.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Acephobia/Arophobia
Moderate: Sexual content and Mental illness
Minor: Bullying, Alcohol, Homophobia, Child abuse, Gun violence, Suicide, Body shaming, Drug use, Domestic abuse, Ableism, Panic attacks/disorders, Rape, and Sexual violence
Minor warnings for imprisonment, theft, disownment. Moderate warnings for disordered eating and internalised acephobia. HP reference.jenny_librarian's review against another edition
informative
reflective
3.5
This is the memoir of an asexual British woman, who also happens to have OCD and anxiety. I felt like a lot of the book was about her mental health and the repercussion, almost to the point where I wouldn't be surprised if an allosexual person asked about those being the root of her sexual orientation. I'm not saying that's the case, but I could understand if someone made that connection.
It's very far from my own experience (ace and otherwise), so maybe that's why I couldn't really connect with what she went through. However, some panels were on point. There's one at the very beginning about how having a boyfriend must be exhausting, and rambling at the end about amatonormativity and how much society pressures us to find a romantic (and sexual) partner to be "complete". The single-page information tidbits at the end of each chapter were also very good and are probably the most important parts of the book. They introduce the split-attraction model and how asexual people are not incomplete in any way and can live a fulfilled life even without sex (or romance in the case of aroace people).
Did not love the comic style. I had difficulty following the flow sometimes because panels aren't always left to right, then up to down (sometimes you have to read both panels on the left before reading those on the right, and the distinction isn't always clear). Her definition of asexuality is also a bit wonky, as she mentions that some other labels can fall under the ace spectrum, but the romantic and demiromantic flags are right under that speech bubble. Romantic attraction is completely different from sexual attraction (which she then goes on to explain in the next chapter-ending), and aromantic allosexual people don't fall under the asexual umbrella. Then, on the page about the split-attraction model, aromantic is in the purple heart with all the sexual attractions and asexual is in the pink heart with all the romantic attractions. That makes zero sense and feels like somebody should have made another round of edits. It's not terribly bad, but considering most people who will pick this book up are only just learning about asexuality, it might confuse them more.
We have to be very careful when we try to educate people about previously unknown orientations and identities, and I feel this missed the mark a little. I'm not saying it to diminish what this person went through - it's a memoir after all, and those are her very real life experiences - but on the educational aspect, I don't see it as a great example.
If you're looking for information on asexuality, I would suggest the resources page at the end of the book, along with ACE by Angela Chen. And if you want a good novel about an aromantic asexual person, pick up Loveless by Alice Oseman.
It's very far from my own experience (ace and otherwise), so maybe that's why I couldn't really connect with what she went through. However, some panels were on point. There's one at the very beginning about how having a boyfriend must be exhausting, and rambling at the end about amatonormativity and how much society pressures us to find a romantic (and sexual) partner to be "complete". The single-page information tidbits at the end of each chapter were also very good and are probably the most important parts of the book. They introduce the split-attraction model and how asexual people are not incomplete in any way and can live a fulfilled life even without sex (or romance in the case of aroace people).
Did not love the comic style. I had difficulty following the flow sometimes because panels aren't always left to right, then up to down (sometimes you have to read both panels on the left before reading those on the right, and the distinction isn't always clear). Her definition of asexuality is also a bit wonky, as she mentions that some other labels can fall under the ace spectrum, but the romantic and demiromantic flags are right under that speech bubble. Romantic attraction is completely different from sexual attraction (which she then goes on to explain in the next chapter-ending), and aromantic allosexual people don't fall under the asexual umbrella. Then, on the page about the split-attraction model, aromantic is in the purple heart with all the sexual attractions and asexual is in the pink heart with all the romantic attractions. That makes zero sense and feels like somebody should have made another round of edits. It's not terribly bad, but considering most people who will pick this book up are only just learning about asexuality, it might confuse them more.
We have to be very careful when we try to educate people about previously unknown orientations and identities, and I feel this missed the mark a little. I'm not saying it to diminish what this person went through - it's a memoir after all, and those are her very real life experiences - but on the educational aspect, I don't see it as a great example.
If you're looking for information on asexuality, I would suggest the resources page at the end of the book, along with ACE by Angela Chen. And if you want a good novel about an aromantic asexual person, pick up Loveless by Alice Oseman.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Mental illness
Minor: Child abuse and Sexual assault
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