Reviews with content warning for Toxic friendship - Ghosts

While I enjoyed reading this book (the audiobook was very well read and recorded) I don't think it will stay with me - it was an engaging read, but there's not enough there for a re-read.

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alexisgarcia's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

this book came to me at perfect time in my life. dolly alderton writes some of the some realistic characters i’ve ever read. her characters are flawed and just so human. the themes of ghosts and self contentment are so well done. i love how the story actually revolves around the main character, rather than the main character AND the love interest. it involved the main characters whole life, her romantic relationships, friendships, family, and even her relationship with herself. i just adored this book and will read anything dolly alderton writes till the end of time <3

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sophiepearson's review against another edition

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lighthearted reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

1.0

I didn’t like this book. The main character is really conceited and selfish. She has no empathy for any of her friends or family considering what they are going through and seems very bitter about being single. She is scathing of the people in her life who are in relationships, yet seems to crave exactly that - a fairytale prince to sweep her off her feet. She doesn’t really develop as a character throughout the book or come to any realisation that perhaps she needs to reevaluate her treatment of others and maybe go to therapy.
Some parts were trying to be a decent exploration of how relationships of all kinds evolve and change as life goes on, and some of the challenges around accepting that - but overall Nina was just so unlikeable that I’m surprised I was even able to finish the book!
There was also some mild transphobia - the characters perceived silliness of cis people putting pronouns in their bios etc - author should probably know that it’s acceptable and in part done to normalise people having different pronouns! Ugh!

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h0lland's review against another edition

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emotional funny reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

I liked this book in the beginning but then grew incredibly tired of what a hater Nina was. But THEN, a few things happened and I found the negativity relatable and also sooo valid. Go off Nina. I will say that analyzing all of your interpersonal relationships through the same light as Ghosts does is probably not good for you! Once the last third of the book rolled around I was drawn in again. I know some people really hate the ending but I cannot really imagine any other ending fitting well here. This was a great coming-of-age for everyone past the age of 18 who is still coming of age. Also fuck

Max

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nikenacs's review against another edition

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lighthearted reflective relaxing medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? No
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.5

[Book club - March 2022]

@ everyone who described this as "relatable" - u good???

Liked the style, but found the content debatable. The book's strong points are definitely its reflections on dad-daughter relationships and the concept of memory/passing of time. However, the other 80% of this book is dedicated to Straight Horny Nonsense™, internalized misogyny, white superficial feminism, casual alcoholism, not a single positive friendship or other interpersonal relationship, and Nina's absolutely insufferable inner monologue. Seriously, the entire way this book describes dating and heterosexual relationships makes me question whether anyone in the straight white millennial dating pool is okay. Like, at all.

I may just not be the intended audience, being queer, ace and in my mid-twenties. Still, I sincerely hope I do not turn out like these sad fucking characters once I'm in my thirties.

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savvylit's review against another edition

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emotional reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? N/A
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

I really enjoyed immersing myself in Nina's perspective. There's a passage early on where she describes her agent, Vivienne, as being able to utter "throwaway thoughts that would become fundamental truth to whoever heard them." That's how I felt about Nina - and Dolly Alderton - while reading Ghosts. Some of Nina's throwaway thoughts seem to perfectly encapsulate truths about living in our modern era.

Here are a few of Nina's observations that felt like fundamental truths to me:

"Dynamics of power always rearrange themselves when you're not watching them."

"I had never known a feeling as unbearable - as sour, wrenching, and unshakeably sad - as pity for a parent."

"I'd noticed this was a thing that people did when they got into their thirties: they saw every personal decision you made as a direct judgement on their lives. If you voted Labour and they voted Lib Dem, they thought you were voting Labour specifically to let them know that their politics were incorrect."

Another aspect of Ghosts that I enjoyed was the relationship dynamics between Nina and her parents. The way that Nina and Nancy deal with Bill's illness was so nuanced and unflinchingly realistic. Adult-child to parent relationships fall onto such a complicated spectrum of feelings. I don't know about you but I rarely find books that explore these relationships beyond two dimensions. But Ghosts fully fleshed out the family dynamics so well.

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tiemzahra's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful lighthearted reflective slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Nina Dean just turned 32, and finally tried to start dating again after a long-term relationship breakup. She tried online dating for the first time but became the victim of ghosting. Her dad was slowly falling into dementia, and Nina started thinking about ageing and the gendered double standard of it.

This book narrated Nina’s seemingly normal everyday life in a year she turned 32, and will be super relatable to people who face the same issue as Nina. Nina was childless, so more often than not she received comments that she must be leading an easier life because of it. At the same time, Nina was too judgmental of her friends’ choice when they become too busy raising a family to hang out with her, and towards her mother’s mid-life crisis.

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kitty03's review against another edition

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emotional funny lighthearted reflective slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

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