lefa's review
5.0
Sometimes just the right book comes to you at just the right time. This book was exactly that for me.
never4get's review
3.0
Caroline's perspective on growing up as an only child is fascinating. She was totally indulged by both her parents, but also trapped in the triad of a pretty dysfunctional family. Wealth seemed to be no problem at any time, but her father is portrayed as a power-wielding bully, prone to outbursts of temper. By contrast, her mother was subservient to her husband. Caroline was swamped with toys and gifts, but had no real friends and no understanding of how other families 'worked'. She was expected to perform well at school and this was drilled into her.
The book jumps around too much for my liking. We do get to hear the gruelling background to both parents - her father who had to escape Nazi Germany, leaving his family behind - apart from a sister. He was eventually able to get his mother out, but not his father and he blamed himself for that.
The parents of Caroline's mother had been a murder/suicide, so there were no grandparents to temper the intense focus of the 3 in the family.
Her father was wealthy from a travel business and liked to indulge them all with expensive meals and travel. To some extent Caroline is aware that she has some of his traits - attention to detail, short-fuse.
Eventually she escapes the intensity of the family atmosphere by coming to Australia - following a love [that we don't hear much about]. Her father was devastated.
Later in life her father has bowel cancer and immediately following an operation for that he develops vascular dementia and is impossible to live with. Caroline and her mother have to make arrangements for him, searching nursing homes that will take him. They are dismayed by what they see in the NHS homes, but find out about a more
The book jumps around too much for my liking. We do get to hear the gruelling background to both parents - her father who had to escape Nazi Germany, leaving his family behind - apart from a sister. He was eventually able to get his mother out, but not his father and he blamed himself for that.
The parents of Caroline's mother had been a murder/suicide, so there were no grandparents to temper the intense focus of the 3 in the family.
Her father was wealthy from a travel business and liked to indulge them all with expensive meals and travel. To some extent Caroline is aware that she has some of his traits - attention to detail, short-fuse.
Eventually she escapes the intensity of the family atmosphere by coming to Australia - following a love [that we don't hear much about]. Her father was devastated.
Later in life her father has bowel cancer and immediately following an operation for that he develops vascular dementia and is impossible to live with. Caroline and her mother have to make arrangements for him, searching nursing homes that will take him. They are dismayed by what they see in the NHS homes, but find out about a more
hannahmayreads's review
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
3.0
Family dynamics and siblings, or in this case the lack of, are endlessly fascinating. They are the ties that bind us, but they’re also the very thing that may place a wedge between ourselves and the worlds (or vice versa).
Baum’s memoir has all of this, and it is heavy with the weight of inherited trauma - something she never fully delves into or resolves. Emotionally abusive and manipulative, her family dynamic is very much a power struggle on all sides. And yet there is an intensity to their love and dependency on each other that I think scares all of them.
Baum managed to straddle the line between humour and heartache well, but the writing felt a little jumpy and disjointed at times. There were gaps with no attempt made at filling them, and often the links between recollections felt tenuous.
bookeboy's review
5.0
Knowing Caroline, I was prepared for something good. I did not expect this, however. Caroline's memoir has surpassed my expectations and has left me a little in awe of her. Only is utterly brilliant. Sophisticated, honest, enlightening, entertaining and beautifully written. This is the kind of memoir I have been waiting for. It is reminiscent of the early twentieth century writing I so enjoy.
Caroline's family history is interesting - populated with extraordinary characters tossed hither and thither by war, love, changing political circumstances and the vagaries of business. But it is the relationship between Caroline and her parents which dominates this book. Her depiction of them is both honest and, I think, respectful. She gives us a portrait which rings true - sharing the good and the bad - allowing them to come forth as the complicated individuals I believe they must be.
Memoirs shouldn't exist to satisfy our urge to pry into the lives of others, they should really exist to help us understand our own lives better, to instruct or enlighten. Only does this. Caroline's honesty about her own foibles, as well as those of her parents, binds us to her. When she faces the turmoil of her father's illness we go through it with her. These chapters are as raw as anything from Karl Ove Knausgaard. And because she is able to share her feelings so openly, we learn from her experience.
I picked the book up because I know Caroline Baum personally. I put it down realising I actually know nothing about her. Well… I do now.
In short, on very many levels, Only is a thoroughly satisfying read.
Caroline's family history is interesting - populated with extraordinary characters tossed hither and thither by war, love, changing political circumstances and the vagaries of business. But it is the relationship between Caroline and her parents which dominates this book. Her depiction of them is both honest and, I think, respectful. She gives us a portrait which rings true - sharing the good and the bad - allowing them to come forth as the complicated individuals I believe they must be.
Memoirs shouldn't exist to satisfy our urge to pry into the lives of others, they should really exist to help us understand our own lives better, to instruct or enlighten. Only does this. Caroline's honesty about her own foibles, as well as those of her parents, binds us to her. When she faces the turmoil of her father's illness we go through it with her. These chapters are as raw as anything from Karl Ove Knausgaard. And because she is able to share her feelings so openly, we learn from her experience.
I picked the book up because I know Caroline Baum personally. I put it down realising I actually know nothing about her. Well… I do now.
In short, on very many levels, Only is a thoroughly satisfying read.
essjay1's review
4.0
Fascinating story of an interesting and extraordinary upbringing. Poignant, beautifully written and one of the best accounts of grief I have read.
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