Reviews

You're Not You by Michelle Wildgen

milica95's review

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dark emotional sad tense slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? No
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.25

wordnerdy's review against another edition

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5.0

When a college student becomes a part-time careworker for a woman with ALS (Lou Gehrig's Disease), her own life begins to transform. There's some dark humor in here, and lots of bittersweetness, plus some college-girl angst. I liked it. A/A-.

cath7472's review against another edition

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4.0

Enjoyable read with a good attempt at describing a carer's experience. A bit lightweight but more than just entertaining.

lesliebossey's review against another edition

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emotional inspiring sad slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

amysbrittain's review against another edition

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4.0

Good'un. Forgot I finished it until I watched the movie. Can't remember: 3.5 stars?

cdel13's review against another edition

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4.0

Difficult book to read, but I'm glad I did.

reading_in_line's review against another edition

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5.0

A book with a Protagonist who has your occupation

she__reads's review

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lighthearted slow-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes

4.5

I really enjoyed this book and believed that it was what I needed to get me out of my reading slump. I found myself relating to some of the things that happened while Bec was in her care giving role and learning about other struggles that I hadn’t thought of. I loved the friendship that was built between the main characters and how descriptive the author was when talking about the food Bec made!

akuhlma03's review against another edition

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3.0

3.5 stars

casachess's review against another edition

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3.0

I'm going to be honest. I read this book because I saw the trailer for the movie, and just the trailer had me in tears. I put this book on my hold list at the library the next day.

I'm not really sure how to feel about it. I didn't have to fight to finish it; it definitely kept my attention. But it was... odd.

The book revolves around Bec, a 21 year old college student who works as a waitress, parties hard, is having an affair with her married professor, and has no direction in life. For some reason (I honestly can't remember now, and I just finished reading the book, which I guess should tell you something), she takes a job as a caregiver for Kate Norris, a wealthy woman in her thirties who has ALS. She was diagnosed two years ago, so by the time Bec comes onto the scene, there isn't much left that Kate is able to do. She's married to Evan, and despite having ALS, Bec finds her to be beautiful, sophisticated, interesting, intelligent, cultured. Kate teaches Bec how to make gourmet meals, gives her books to take home, and the two become close.

Their relationship becomes even closer after Kate kicks her husband out for having an affair. Evan carries on with another woman, and everyone except for Kate thinks that this is not entirely unreasonable. I was horrified that this would be framed as anything but despicable - a woman had a fatal degenerative disease, and her husband can't keep it in his pants until she dies, and yet somehow it's the woman with the disease that's being unreasonable and overreacting. What?! Kate buys another house, and
Bec moves in with her as her disease progresses further. Kate dies, of course, but... it wasn't an emotional scene for me. Bec's understandable depression afterwards didn't, either. The weird thing, though, is that while Kate and Bec definitely bonded and were close, it never seemed to become a close friendship, which is how the book seems to sell it. There was also talk of how both women are "changed", but Kate remained rather one-dimensional. I appreciated the realistic (I assume) depiction of ALS, in that the author does not mistake disability for being dead or useless. Kate is still treated as a person with emotions and desires. But it mostly revolves around Bec; Kate seemingly is completely at ease with her disease, and who knows? Maybe people with ALS are typically very accepting by the time it has progressed this far. But there isn't any talk of fear, or regret, or frustration, or anything at all really, from Kate. And that made a difference to me, because I find it very hard to believe that a human being could go through something as devastating as ALS and not feel anything other than serenity and acceptance. It was the hints of true emotion that touched me in the trailer for the movie adaptation - Hilary Swank struggling to say that she just wants to be able to scream.

Ultimately, Kate serves as nothing more than a tool through which Bec turns her life around.
And while the obvious ending would be that Bec decides to go into nursing or something along those lines, instead she decides to attempt to become... a chef. Um, OK.
I also was irritated because one thing Bec seems to complain about after Kate's death is the loss of lifestyle. Kate was wealthy, Bec got to live in Kate's wealthy house, eat gourmet food and get treated to lavish gifts from her boss. It seemed like an odd thing to complain about missing, and only because we're again told that these two women become extremely close, in a life-changing friendship. If that were the case, then why so much agonizing over having to go back to living as a poor college student?

I'm disappointed to say it, but much from the trailer of the movie wasn't in the novel - and based on that, I honestly think the movie will be better than the book. There could have been - and should have been - so much more emotion and heart in this story, but sadly, that just wasn't the case.