akingston5's review against another edition
“We buried one of dad’s lungs. It was a spring day, the trees were bursting with cherries, and the countryside was beautiful. But we were all wearing black for the ceremony. The whole family was there. Men in white bore the enormous lung on their shoulders. Dad was watching with us as they buried a part of his body. Some were sniffling into the handkerchiefs. Others were watching the procession without really grasping that a piece of my father was about to disappear and that, soon, other bits of his body might be removed, until we had buried it all.”
•••
Fayolle begins with this opening passage and goes forth on to a story about the grief, frustration, and absurdity of being with a loved one in those last dying months knowing not when but surely they will die. It’s a fast read that asks for a slow attention, and the illustrations are as much, if not more so, part of the story as the words. The dying of her father is beautifully, humanly told, and I cannot recommend this book enough if you’re searching for something about this stage of life.
•••
Fayolle begins with this opening passage and goes forth on to a story about the grief, frustration, and absurdity of being with a loved one in those last dying months knowing not when but surely they will die. It’s a fast read that asks for a slow attention, and the illustrations are as much, if not more so, part of the story as the words. The dying of her father is beautifully, humanly told, and I cannot recommend this book enough if you’re searching for something about this stage of life.
f18's review against another edition
reflective
sad
slow-paced
2.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent and Grief
Moderate: Cancer and Dementia
Minor: Medical content
naughty_librarian's review against another edition
4.0
This is a brutal graphic novel memoir that hits close to home for me: my parents are disabled and my parents-in-law both recently passed away. Having to translate for someone reminds me of what I go through with my dad, who is hearing impaired, and also having to wait on someone helpless, like my physically disabled mom, which somehow turns them into a cruel tyrant... It must be a defense mechanism for people who lose most of their independence... And the suffering and waiting for death... Sitting in hospice with my mother-in-law, wishing it would just be over already... The dragging around of oxygen that my father-in-law was chained to... The public way life feels as the medical personnel descend, the imposition of extended family that wants to grieve too... So personal, and so true. I don't think I was quite ready to read this, and therefore my rating may be inaccurate. Sidenote: I wish I could read it in its original French.
tinaathena's review against another edition
4.0
Really beautiful lines and colour. Had to take a break in the middle as it was a lot of emotional pain and suffering and loss. That said, there is a certain levity in the artwork and approach to the storytelling of death and mourning.
smay's review
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
3.5
Interesting art and approach to a story about grief. I liked the author's honesty about the bad times and the imagery she chose to illustrate the illness and death of her father.
gfox3737's review against another edition
4.0
A surreal fable about a dying father. Rough and inventive with illustrations that remind me of old airplane emergency comics.
bluepigeon's review
5.0
An incisive examination of the complex relationship with a father who's dying. Marion Fayolle's The Tenderness of Stones beautifully and painstakingly explores the various interlocking stages of having a loved one with terminal illness. Grief is a complex beast made even more intricately nuanced by the fact that before the illness, for a whole lifetime, the relationship between father and daughter was problematic. Described as an absent and distant father who rarely used his words and who was perhaps an alcoholic, the terminally ill man who is slowly being resected and rearranged by the medical machine becomes the dependent child who needs constant care and attention and who shows no gratitude for the efforts of the family. The mother plays mother, now to her own husband. allowing the grown children to escape her attentions, only to return to desperately try to hang on to the dying man, still seeking his approval and his love, still getting hurt by the lack of it. Some of the metaphorical descriptions work really well for the story and are rendered in loving, detailed, crosshatched attention and expertise.
Highly recommended for everyone who has loved (or unloved) ones, because we will one day all be either taking care of them or being taking care of by them. Also recommended for those who like cats, plants and family trees.
Highly recommended for everyone who has loved (or unloved) ones, because we will one day all be either taking care of them or being taking care of by them. Also recommended for those who like cats, plants and family trees.
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