Scan barcode
Reviews tagging 'Toxic friendship'
Yinka, Where is Your Huzband? by Lizzie Damilola Blackburn
5 reviews
fuguballoon's review against another edition
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
I was getting ready to give this book 4 stars, but the ending ruined it for me. How can this be a story about learning to love yourself and not change yourself for a partner when Yinka's love interest literally changes himself to become more attractive to her?!
That's not to say that there weren't good parts of this book. I enjoyed the first three quarters of it. I was definitely invested in Yinka's story. I liked how differentiated and well-developed the large cast of characters was. Yinka's most immature choices I chalked up to the author saying that she started working on Yinka in her early- to mid-twenties; I think there might have been some bleedthrough there.
Also, I respect the author wanting to show the power of therapy! But a single session is not a cure-all. Ironically, she did such a good job of describing the toxic personalities in Yinka's circle, thateveryone becoming magically chill was completely unbelievable, even in Yinka's heightened world.
On the whole, I'm frustrated with this book. I think Yinka deserved a more nuanced ending. For being an 11-hour(!) audiobook, I certainly wanted one for her.
That's not to say that there weren't good parts of this book. I enjoyed the first three quarters of it. I was definitely invested in Yinka's story. I liked how differentiated and well-developed the large cast of characters was. Yinka's most immature choices I chalked up to the author saying that she started working on Yinka in her early- to mid-twenties; I think there might have been some bleedthrough there.
Also, I respect the author wanting to show the power of therapy! But a single session is not a cure-all. Ironically, she did such a good job of describing the toxic personalities in Yinka's circle, that
On the whole, I'm frustrated with this book. I think Yinka deserved a more nuanced ending. For being an 11-hour(!) audiobook, I certainly wanted one for her.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Toxic friendship
Moderate: Racism, Death of parent, and Alcohol
taleofabibliophile's review
emotional
funny
hopeful
lighthearted
reflective
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Pregnancy and Toxic friendship
Moderate: Bullying, Cursing, Sexism, Grief, and Death of parent
Minor: Cancer and Terminal illness
Content warning: Colourismadrienne_rennie's review against another edition
funny
hopeful
lighthearted
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
Content Warnings
Minor: Body shaming, Death of parent, Outing, Toxic friendship, and Alcohol
theverycraftyvegan's review against another edition
funny
lighthearted
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
A well written story about self love, sisterly love, motherly love, and a quest for true love.
I both loved and hated Yinka. It was a real rollercoaster. LoL. I loved her at the start of the book as the reader is getting to know her. I felt a lot of sympathy for her—the struggles she was faced with and how she was treated by family.
But then I hated her as she became completely self absorbed and obsessed with dating. Her lying/omissions spun out of control and she became a disgusting person. I definitely wouldn’t have wanted to be her friend and she’s lucky she didn’t alienate everyone who cared for her.
After some tough love and hard truths from her friends and family, Yinka worked on herself with the help of a therapist and she stepped into her true self. She gained the self confidence she needed to become the woman she was meant to be.
I both loved and hated Yinka. It was a real rollercoaster. LoL. I loved her at the start of the book as the reader is getting to know her. I felt a lot of sympathy for her—the struggles she was faced with and how she was treated by family.
But then I hated her as she became completely self absorbed and obsessed with dating. Her lying/omissions spun out of control and she became a disgusting person. I definitely wouldn’t have wanted to be her friend and she’s lucky she didn’t alienate everyone who cared for her.
After some tough love and hard truths from her friends and family, Yinka worked on herself with the help of a therapist and she stepped into her true self. She gained the self confidence she needed to become the woman she was meant to be.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Body shaming, Racism, Toxic relationship, and Toxic friendship
Minor: Death of parent
klitanightfuryreads's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
relaxing
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
I was sent this book by Penguin Random House as an ARC for a review…For starters this book is a super easy read, and it can be finished in one day - the language is easy and the writing is simple and straightforward.
I am a little torn about this book because I hated it and loved it at the same time. I hated the main character and even at the end with her “redemption” it was not a character I enjoyed. It felt to me like she was very shallow and even if her friends and family kept saying she was kind or so “unlike” her - it did not seem that way to me.
The rest of the book tho - it’s a win. I saw my life and my family in this book. I am from Central America and if I could tell you how many times I’ve been embarrassed and talked down to by relatives because I am in my thirties, childless and single I would be rich. I really enjoyed the portrayal of the native Nigerians and the first generation English born children who struggled with culture, language and fitting in…. but to me the most meaningful message from this book was the spotlight it brought to therapy (which was something I was not expecting)
*** Minor Spoilers ahead***
Having the main character confront her fears, demons and self-hatred in therapy was just beautiful, sweet and humbling. There were so many “aha” moments during those last 100 pages that I wish the book had focus more on this area, and/or maybe show that therapy takes more time. I know for the sake of wrapping up the book - this was condensed into a few pages and by the end of the book everything just seem to be “magically fixed” after a few visits to the therapist, and the most unrealistic part was her family somehow completely changing their mindset (I am talking generational trauma, mindsets and baggage here) being magically fixed overnight with a simple conversation.
Aside from this - I would recommend this book to anyone, specially those trying to expand their cultural knowledge. I give props to the writer as this is her first book and she wrote a beautiful strong book.
I am a little torn about this book because I hated it and loved it at the same time. I hated the main character and even at the end with her “redemption” it was not a character I enjoyed. It felt to me like she was very shallow and even if her friends and family kept saying she was kind or so “unlike” her - it did not seem that way to me.
The rest of the book tho - it’s a win. I saw my life and my family in this book. I am from Central America and if I could tell you how many times I’ve been embarrassed and talked down to by relatives because I am in my thirties, childless and single I would be rich. I really enjoyed the portrayal of the native Nigerians and the first generation English born children who struggled with culture, language and fitting in…. but to me the most meaningful message from this book was the spotlight it brought to therapy (which was something I was not expecting)
*** Minor Spoilers ahead***
Having the main character confront her fears, demons and self-hatred in therapy was just beautiful, sweet and humbling. There were so many “aha” moments during those last 100 pages that I wish the book had focus more on this area, and/or maybe show that therapy takes more time. I know for the sake of wrapping up the book - this was condensed into a few pages and by the end of the book everything just seem to be “magically fixed” after a few visits to the therapist, and the most unrealistic part was her family somehow completely changing their mindset (I am talking generational trauma, mindsets and baggage here) being magically fixed overnight with a simple conversation.
Aside from this - I would recommend this book to anyone, specially those trying to expand their cultural knowledge. I give props to the writer as this is her first book and she wrote a beautiful strong book.
Content Warnings
Minor: Body shaming, Bullying, Cancer, Death, Fatphobia, Mental illness, Racial slurs, Racism, Grief, Death of parent, Pregnancy, Toxic friendship, and Classism