Reviews with content warning for Adult/minor relationship - This Is Why They Hate Us

Reviews tagging 'Adult/minor relationship'

This Is Why They Hate Us by Aaron H. Aceves

14 reviews

redheadorganist's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional funny inspiring reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Content Warnings

anni_banani's review against another edition

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emotional funny informative reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

Other YA books- this is a great book to look to.

DAMN that was one of my top 5 YA books easily. It made it into the “How my Life Would Have Been Different if I Had this as a Teen” ™️category.

The most unique thing in this book to me was the tone jumps; one moment it’s meaningful horny and turning me on 🤣, the next it’s meaningfully with nuance discussing what it’s like to have anxiety depression mood swings, then it’s meaningful commentary on queer lit or life as a bisexual person or race, then a random but meaningful bit about how Palestinian history is white washed. It’s a romance then a comedy then a drama and I’m scared for the MC. I related as life has tone jumps.

Never have I related to this book more as a Pansexual and bisexual person or with my own experience of mental health. Aceves spends the most time painting a detailed nuanced picture from how someone can go from bad sleep to bad self esteem to bad harmful thoughts to suicidal ideations. I love not just the Bi rep here but discussing life as a bi person, what’s to be expected of us depending on our perceived gender, biphobia within the queer community, how attraction happens. Often it’s just a footnote or a characteristic in a novel thrown out with the same care as “she loved coffee and is bisexual” . No rainbow / bi washing here.

I was also really impressed with how I loved the book from start to finish- gobbled it up like the Cookie Monster. But there was areas for characters to be grey, imperfect. The MC and his BFF definitely got some shit to work out in their dynamic like all teens, like all humans, but their love is so true.

One of the reasons I wish I had this book besides mental health, besides breaking down biphobic myths, was the sex positive perspective here. Sex (alone and partnered) should not only be respectful, consensual and safer but also joyful! The characters struggle with this in a real honest way, sometimes internalizing messages that sex is wrong or pressure to have sex, they learn.

Aveces I really hope you get an adult book published cuz this book turned me on so much, I can’t wait to see what you would do with actual grown ups!!!

Read this book for

A great discussion of sexuality and sexual exploration for young adults. How to be doing that joyfully and responsibly and how not to
East LA
Breaking down various stereotypes including ones about Bi people, Muslims Arabs and Palestinians, Latines, gay adults, people living with mental illness
Parents figuring it out as they go and really learning
Good ass therapists

Content Warnings

jennireadsmaybe's review against another edition

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emotional funny hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

This is Why They Hate Us is the perfect example of a book that can save lives. If I had had this book as a teenager struggling with many of the same things as Qique I might have felt more comfortable seeking help earlier. Qique's story is so important for people of all ages!

Aaron H. Aceves is so so good at crafting likable characters who you can't help but root for. Qique's POV is hilarious, heartfelt, and so true to the messy nature of teenage-hood. All of his different relationships are handled so well. All of his hook ups remained true to who he is and what he was trying to do. I really really really (probably a lot more reallys too) his friendship with Fabiola who is basically his other half; they were both so funny and messy!

Read if you like coming of age stories with romance, diverse queer representation (bisexual, mentally ill, Latine, teenage boy mmc and several other side characters as well), and navigating queer identities as a teenager, and wholesome coming out stories. I genuinely can't wait to read whatever comes next for Aaron H. Aceves!

Content Warnings

tinytrashqueen's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

Content Warnings

immaculate's review against another edition

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emotional funny hopeful inspiring medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

sooooooo so cute

Content Warnings

bookishmillennial's review against another edition

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challenging emotional funny hopeful reflective sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes

disclaimer if you’ve read other reviews by me and are noticing a pattern: You’re correct that I don’t really give starred reviews because I don’t like leaving them. Most often, I will only leave them if I vehemently despised a book.

I enjoy most books for what they are, & I extract lessons from them all. Everyone’s reading experiences are subjective, so I hope my reviews provide enough information to let you know if a book is for you or not, regardless if I add stars or not.

Find me on Instagram: @bookish.millennial or tiktok: @bookishmillennial

My friend Jillian recommended this and I’m so glad she did! I thought this was a beautiful explorative coming-of-age, romance & slice-of-life piece of teen fiction. 17-year-old Enrique “Qique” is exploring his bisexuality during summer break, and I am here for his messy, confusing, quick-paced ho era (affectionate!!!!)

His relationship with his parents is so sweet, and I adored the dynamic he had with his Afro-Latina best friend Fabiola, who is also bisexual! Fabiola is chasing after thick-thighed Molly, while Qique has a few contenders!

Manny — Latino tough guy exterior but sends major sexual tension Qique’ away
Tyler — white guy who shows off his package via basketball shorts & is the talk of the town; also a huge stoner & other characters call him a “wanksta”
Ziggy — buttoned-up Black student body president from school who he feels *vibes* around but everyone comments “I didn’t think he liked boys”
Saleem — his devastatingly gorgeous, short Palestinian king, his unrequited love, pining so passionately for, long time crush and best friend
Lauren — meets her at a county fair or amusement park in a group setting

What I enjoyed most about a lot of Qique’s interactions with all of his potential love interests us that he didn’t have to continually “come out” to his love interests. For the most part, they didn’t talk about their sexualities, which felt authentic to how things unravel when you’re a teenager. I also was so proud of Qique for recognizing what kinds of dynamics worked for him, how hanging out with certain people made him feel, & what he truly wanted & was searching for in these experiences.

I think Aceves did a fantastic job of layering the sex scenes in this book with commentary and introspection as to what was coming up for Qique each time. Nothing is explicit; this isn’t smût, but books like this are important for teens to investigate their own sexuality, because let’s be real. Teens are fucking. Let’s not pretend we were born yesterday. It’s important to name these feelings as they’re experiencing them, and to read about characters figuring it out as they possibly fumble through it!

Lastly, the mental health representation was immaculate — to pretend adolescence is a fever dream of solely joyful times is to deny the human experience lol. I felt for Qique so badly! I am so glad there was talk therapy in this book, and how Qique recognized that maybe he still needed these types of guided conversations. The way medication is introduced and not demonized was wonderful too.

All around, this was an excellent book and I highly recommend it to all ages, but damn, I wish I had a book like this when I was fucking at 17.

Quotations that stood out to me:

Let’s do the things that will lead to us becoming the people we want to be.”

My best friend is kind of a big deal when it comes to social media. She posts everything from political opinions to astrology memes to thirst traps to comments on her celebrity crushes’ thirst traps to analysis of her favorite shows to thoughts on the Afro-Latina experience, and has gained an almost cult following along the way. One time she posted a video of us together with the caption Me and the baby daddy, and I started getting vaguely threatening DMs from hot girls with septum piercings.

It would be so much easier not to feel anything for anyone at all. The problem is I feel so much.

“Because boys are the worst. If I could choose not to be attracted to them, I would.”

I grip my phone so hard I wonder if I might actually crush it. I did it. I’m amazing. A true queer icon.

It’s funny how everything’s a double entendre when you’re living a double life.

I’m done with people. People are exhausting. Sure, they can be fun sometimes; they can “open you up to new experiences” or whatever. But the anxiety leading up to spending time with them and the emotional drain afterward make them not worth it.

I want a person to demonstrate that it’s possible to love me, no matter what. And those three words are so important: no matter what. I want someone to love me unconditionally. I want to be certain that nothing I could ever do would make them stop.

(And yes, the official name of a group of butterflies is called a kaleidoscope. I found that out a year ago after fact-checking a Simpsons episode that claimed a flock of crows is called a murder. The show writers were right, and I’m glad to say there are plenty of strange collective animal names. A squad of flamingos is called a flamboyance! How wonderfully gay! A clique of frogs is called an army! Who are they fighting? I don’t know, but I support them!)

I don’t know. And I shouldn’t care. Because this is exhausting. I’m tired of being envious of people. It’s a never-ending list.

They are living, not just surviving. And I hate them for it. And I hate myself for hating them for it.

It always happens in the summer. People are supposed to get sad in the winter, but for me it’s always the summer. There’s too much time. Too much time to think. Too much time to feel. I

Here’s the thing about therapists: I always know what they’re gonna say. I know how I should be, how I should feel, what’s “healthy behavior.” But there’s a reason I don’t always go in that direction. When you’re poor and overworked you don’t go to the grocery store after your shift ends to shop and then go home to slave over the stove, even if that’s the healthier, more cost-efficient option. When you’re poor and overworked you go to McDonald’s, and even though you already feel guilty for ordering a large Big Mac meal, you throw in a strawberry shake because there’s a chance that fucking ...more

So often I blame myself for being lazy and dramatic, and while I’m sure I can’t blame everything on my mental illness(es), I just don’t want to be making it all up.

I’d rather not die after finding out how much there is to live for.

There’s a tension between us now, unmistakable and unwelcome.

You internalize an idea about yourself and it starts affecting how you act and you end up with a self-fulfilling prophecy. So I’m constantly doubting my attractions, my actual feelings. I’m gaslighting myself. Because the message I’ve gotten about guys who like guys and girls is that we’re faking, that we couldn’t possibly be attracted to girls if we’re attracted to boys. Bi girls get the same thing, but for them it means they’re perceived as straight and for us it means we’re perceived as gay.

Is this what those guys on the app meant when they put “not into drama” in their bios? They don’t want someone who will call them out on their bullshit? Who demands to be treated like a human being?

I hate that prejudice is a factor when it comes to my love life. I hate that it makes it seem like I see women as a second choice or a backup plan or a consolation prize when I could very well meet a girl one day who makes me redefine love. I want to be free. I don’t want to consider what people will think of me when it comes to what I want. But that’s not life. At least, not for me, not at this point in time. I hope eventually I find the courage to follow my heart when I need to, wherever it takes me.

Thinking about the fact that so many people have used religion as a way of making people like me and Saleem hate ourselves is crushing. But then I think about my parents (who still love me) and how no one group is a monolith, that no matter what your religion is, you can still choose to love others.

I don’t deserve to feel shame, to feel lonely, to be treated like a sex object, to be ignored, to be someone’s experiment. I definitely don’t deserve any of that. And I’m glad I know that now. It’s a feeling I hope doesn’t leave me for the rest of my life.

It’s not ideal, not anywhere close to that, but we make it an enchanted life. We bisexuals are, after all, mythical creatures.

I feel the weight of it, and it hurts. But I stop blocking the fear. And with it comes everything else. Joy and sadness and exhilaration.

Content Warnings

evelynyle_88's review

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emotional funny lighthearted medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Content Warnings

xandry's review against another edition

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emotional funny lighthearted reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

Content Warnings

maple_dove's review against another edition

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challenging emotional medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

This book was not what I expected but it didn't disappoint!

I loved the discussions of religious bigotry, and the LGBTQ community and religion. It's a difficult topic to navigate, but I think this book handled it well.
As an asexual person, I didn't expect this book to be so sexually graphic (mostly in terms of dialogue and thoughts), but I'm glad. We need to let teenagers explore their sexuality, too (safely).
I can't say the bipolar disorder rep was accurate, as I'm not bipolar myself and don't know enough to say. Speaking of which, I loved all the representation in this book!: Bisexual, Mexican-American, Afro-Latina American, Latino-American, Arab Palestinian-American, and Gay characters can all be found in this book. :)

Content Warnings

lim's review

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slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

0.25

Content Warnings

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