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Reviews tagging 'Death of parent'
Tous les hommes désirent naturellement savoir by Nina Bouraoui
2 reviews
james1star's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Wow! Honestly this book totally blew me away, by page three I knew it was something special and at thirty three it became a new favourite of mine.
Bouraoui’s work of autofiction tells her story of being a lesbian in 1980s Paris exploring her sexuality and identity under the backdrop of a growing threat (AIDS) and a legacy of silence and shame within the queer community. This marks the ‘chapters’ (they’re tiny, none more then three pages) headed ‘Becoming’ with the others: ‘Remembering’ and ‘Knowing’ giving the reader insight into Nina’s childhood split between Algeria and France, where her Father and Mother are from respectively. There is rather minimal plot but you don’t read it for this, the poetic, lyrical, mesmerising, darn right beautiful prose pulls you in and refuses to let you go from page one right to the very end. The writing is so exquisite leaving me stunned on nearly every page, I underlined whilst reading and only about 70% is left untouched, that’s how amazing I found it. What I also loved was how relatable parts of this was, as a queer person reading this there was just a lot I could not only understand but wholeheartedly feel within me and for this I truly appreciate books you can see yourself in. The queer experience is only half of what’s encapsulated within, that if being an immigrant and having two nationalities/identities is so well articulated. Additionally, themes of friendships, relationships, family dynamics, motherhood, religion and politics, racism and so many more are discussed.
I could fill pages upon pages with quotes from this book but I’ll narrow it down so you have something to look forward to when you read it… because you must read this book. These are the best from the first thirty three pages, there’s a lot where this comes from:
‘In the gay community (I like these two words, they don’t do much belong to me as own me)…’
‘France is an outfit I wear; Algeria is my skin, exposed to sun and storms.’
‘There is such thing as a gay childhood. My childhood. No excuses are needed. There’s no explanation. It simply is.’
‘The gay child is not lacking, she is different, outside of the norm, inside a normality of her own; not until later will she come to understand that her normality marks her out from others, condemns her to secrecy and shame.’
Bouraoui’s work of autofiction tells her story of being a lesbian in 1980s Paris exploring her sexuality and identity under the backdrop of a growing threat (AIDS) and a legacy of silence and shame within the queer community. This marks the ‘chapters’ (they’re tiny, none more then three pages) headed ‘Becoming’ with the others: ‘Remembering’ and ‘Knowing’ giving the reader insight into Nina’s childhood split between Algeria and France, where her Father and Mother are from respectively. There is rather minimal plot but you don’t read it for this, the poetic, lyrical, mesmerising, darn right beautiful prose pulls you in and refuses to let you go from page one right to the very end. The writing is so exquisite leaving me stunned on nearly every page, I underlined whilst reading and only about 70% is left untouched, that’s how amazing I found it. What I also loved was how relatable parts of this was, as a queer person reading this there was just a lot I could not only understand but wholeheartedly feel within me and for this I truly appreciate books you can see yourself in. The queer experience is only half of what’s encapsulated within, that if being an immigrant and having two nationalities/identities is so well articulated. Additionally, themes of friendships, relationships, family dynamics, motherhood, religion and politics, racism and so many more are discussed.
I could fill pages upon pages with quotes from this book but I’ll narrow it down so you have something to look forward to when you read it… because you must read this book. These are the best from the first thirty three pages, there’s a lot where this comes from:
‘In the gay community (I like these two words, they don’t do much belong to me as own me)…’
‘France is an outfit I wear; Algeria is my skin, exposed to sun and storms.’
‘There is such thing as a gay childhood. My childhood. No excuses are needed. There’s no explanation. It simply is.’
‘The gay child is not lacking, she is different, outside of the norm, inside a normality of her own; not until later will she come to understand that her normality marks her out from others, condemns her to secrecy and shame.’
Content Warnings
Moderate: Sexual harassment, Violence, Racism, War, and Homophobia
Minor: Sexism, Religious bigotry, Bullying, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Lesbophobia, Infidelity, Alcoholism, Drug abuse, Suicide, Antisemitism, Grief, Mental illness, Islamophobia, Death of parent, Sexual violence, Rape, Domestic abuse, Addiction, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt, Colonisation, and Misogyny
bookedbymadeline's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
This is a difficult review to write since it’s the book is an autobiographical novel, which means some parts are from the author’s life and other parts are fictionalized (but we don’t know which are which). It is known that the author is part French and part Algerian so it was interesting to read about her coming of age between cultures. Nina grows up in Algeria until she’s 14 years old when her family flees to Paris after her mother is assaulted. Nina visits a gay club every night and walks the streets of Paris, struggling to accept her sexuality and reflecting on her childhood.
The chapters are written as short snippets titled “remembering, becoming, or knowing.” The timeline throughout the book is scattered which could be confusing at times. However I did still enjoy the concept of the shorter chapters, viewing Nina’s experiences through quick glances. Even though they’re short, you could still get a feel for her past in an intense way. However I would’ve been interested to go deeper into getting to know her!
The writing style was well done and had beautiful prose, which led to me annotating several passages. The book is a great exploration and discussions on issues of identity, colonialism, discovering sexuality, and family trauma-specifically around mother daughter relationships.
Overall the book could be confusing at times, especially in the beginning, but I ended up really enjoying it!
Content Warnings
Graphic: War, Sexual assault, Suicide, Rape, Racism, Homophobia, Violence, Misogyny, and Alcoholism
Moderate: Xenophobia, Sexual content, Death of parent, and Drug abuse
Minor: Domestic abuse, Pedophilia, Miscarriage, and Child abuse
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