Reviews tagging 'Infidelity'

A Curious History of Sex by Kate Lister

8 reviews

savage_book_review's review against another edition

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funny informative lighthearted medium-paced

3.5

Picked this up as it's included in my Audible subscription and I really enjoy the author's podcast, 'Betwixt the Sheets'. Kate Lister is an engaging and energetic historian, who deals with the history of sex, scandal and society with frankness, openness and with a lighthearted humour that still manages to convey the more serious side of the subject.

As she states, it would be impossible to present a comprehensive history of this topic, so she has chosen to focus more on curiosities and less considered topics in this book. For example, drawing a link between the invention of the bicycle and the emancipation (sexual, fashionable and political) of women. It comes across as well researched, well presented and well balanced - although the author's opinions are clearly recognisable throughout, it is first and foremost a history, reporting the facts as they are known. In some respects this was a little disconcerting for me as I am used to hearing more of her own thoughts and opinions via the podcast, but it was interesting to experience this more scholarly side to her.

Clearly, there is a lot of explicit language and descriptive imagery throughout. Indeed, there is a whole chapter dedicated to the history of the 'c' bomb! It should be squirm-inducing, but the author takes pride in shining a light on these private practices and stressing that there is nothing to be ashamed of. The point is repeatedly made that shame around the subject is purely a social construct and that discussions about sex should be far more common. Likewise, although not said directly, the message that comes across is that as long as what you are up to is legal, safe and between consenting adults, you do you.

It's really interesting to see the changes in the perception of sex over the centuries, and the debunking of a few myths about the most 'liberated' and 'repressed' eras of history. I also love how she has included various euphemisms in the text for various sexual acts, and notes the earliest date that we have evidence they were used. Some are well known and still common, others really show their age and definitely raise a giggle! In some regards, I would like the book to have been longer so that more subjects could have been covered. Equally, she addresses the fact that she can only report these things on the basis of her own experiences and life - she sensitively deals with questions of race, gender and sexual orientation where they arise, acknowledging that she cannot possibly reflect all the nuances because she does not necessarily form part of the community being discussed. This gentle approach is a positive reflection of the progress made when compared with the historical sources quoted in the text, which were produced by such a narrow section of society. 

I wouldn't say that any of the topics covered are obscure, but I'd argue that some may be a little too 'niche'. Part of me wonders if the book might appeal to a wider readership if it had chosen broader subject matter and explored the more general history of sex and relationships and historical perceptions thereof, rather than the specific subjects mentioned. Nevertheless, it is a very interesting read!

The one criticism I do have is that there are a few phrases and details that are repeated on several occasions throughout, sometimes almost verbatim and sometimes within the space of a couple of pages (or even paragraphs). Nothing another pass with an editor couldn't fix, but I found myself getting a bit frustrated when it kept happening. 

For the audiobook, the narration was not as smooth and enjoyable as I had hoped it would be. When the author is reading her own words, it works brilliantly - her voice is conversational, light and easy to listen to. However, when faced with quotations from sources and the pronunciation of names from history or of foreign writers, her reading becomes incredibly stilted; it sounds like she hasn't practiced the pronunciation in advance and is trying to sound it out there and then. There are also a few moments where a name or a date gets absorbed into the text surrounding it so it's a little unclear what she's quoting from. Of course, reading the physical version would negate these issues.

An interesting read.

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cattheteawitchfairy's review

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informative fast-paced

5.0

A really interesting book that I will take to build upon with other research! Looking at sexuality has always been a difficult topic but this book links it to so many things and explores it all in a sensitive, funny and informative way. Would highly recommend!

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tlholmes's review against another edition

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challenging informative reflective medium-paced

3.75


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bookishwondergoth's review against another edition

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funny informative lighthearted reflective medium-paced

5.0

I absolutely bloody loved this book. Irreverent, exploratory, informative and funny, 'A Curious History of Sex' absolutely obliterated my post-travel reading slump and gave me much to think about and laugh about over the last couple of days. If you’ve ever followed Kate Lister on social media, you’ll already have a rough idea of what you’re getting into. I’ll never think of the humble bicycle in quite the same way again.

This was a very excellent overview of the history of sex which which covers off a wide-range of sex-related topics at a very high level (vaginas, clits, penises, orgasms, sex toys, reproduction, contraceptives, language, legislation, medicine, sex workers…). The history Kate delves into is pretty Western, cis, and hetero-centric, but she gives a little disclaimer/explanation at the beginning and also does try to discuss and bring in other cultures and sexualities where possible. Although I’d have personally loved a bit more in-depth intersectional analysis of certain topics, there is an extensive bibliography provided along with further reading suggestions, so I mostly just strapped myself in and enjoyed the ride.

And what a ride! Some of the things human have made up or surmised with regards to sex over the centuries are truly mind-boggling and laugh out loud hilarious. Of course, on the flip side of that, humans have done a lot of fucked up, batshit crazy stuff to do with sex as well. Kate Lister drags it all out in the open and presents it with its pants down for all of us to see. Despite her academic credentials, her writing style is very informal, littered with historical slang and sprinkled with her own wry observations that I personally found very easy and an absolute delight to read. For those who don’t know Kate Lister, she is a very sex-positive and outspoken feminist who is absolutely not afraid to give her (very informed) opinion on contentious issues such as abortion and prostitution. I personally love this about her writing, but if you’re seeking a drier, more academic and objective tone when it comes to your sex history, you probably won’t find it here.

My edition of this book is also packed full of beautiful colour images that really enhanced my reading experience. They’re not at all safe for work, obviously, but definitely made me smile or wince upon multiple occasions.

Speaking of wincing, this is an adult non-fiction book about the history of sex—which is often disgusting and brutal. Expect graphic scenes of sexual and medical content, accounts and instances of sexual violence, horrifying contemporary sources packed full of sexism, misogyny and more, and an entire chapter dedicated to FGM which still managed to trigger a vasovagal syncope episode from me, despite in-text warnings from Lister.

A very thought-provoking and compulsively readable popular science book that I cannot recommend highly enough. Loved it.

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bookswithgeorgia's review

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adventurous dark funny informative lighthearted medium-paced

3.75


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thejuliette's review against another edition

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funny informative reflective fast-paced

5.0


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now_booking's review against another edition

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funny informative reflective slow-paced

3.5

3.5 Stars! This is quite an interesting compendium of the interesting and unique history of sex, sexual practices and reproductive health. It’s written with a sort of academic matter-of-fact, “did you know” humour, that passes interesting facts whilst acknowledging the limitations of source data. It’s funny with its running collection of euphemisms around sex and reproductive health, but never puerile, in-depth and I suppose somewhat explicit at times by virtue of the subjects, but never in a titillating way- it’s very scholarly- kind of like a nerd-out about the historical intersection of sex and culture. Chapters focus on the relationship between sex and language, sex and sexual organs, sex and food, sex toys, hygiene, reproduction, menstruation, sex work and consent. Of course in any book investigating the history of sex in depth, gender is a sub-theme, from misogyny to queer phobia to erasure, be mindful if these are things you might find triggering.

Overall, I liked this and I enjoyed meandering through it slowly over the past couple of months. I read the book at times and listened to the audio read by the author, at other times and I found both interesting and felt that I learned a lot about the history and anthropology of sex. I recommend this if sex is something that interests you from an academic standpoint. This is entertaining but also filled with a lot of factoids and trivia. For me if there is a down side, it is that whilst there is certainly reference to non-“Western” traditions in this book, I would say to a large extent, this book focuses on Western histories of sex with to a lesser extent some focus on practices from India. And this is understandable because this book relies on (mostly verified) written histories and traditions rather than oral ones. But I would have loved to have more content around Africa and other parts of Asia (other than India) and even other indigenous populations, and I fear those narratives might be lost forever.

Whilst this author editorializes a lot, it never feels like she’s giving too much personal opinion. There is some though. If you’re a fan of the Twitter page, “Whores of Yore,” you’ll probably know the vibe and quite like this book. I recommend if sex is something you want to get nerdy about - definitely check out the cool sources cited. This is definitely a labour of love.

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reocalabra's review against another edition

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funny hopeful informative reflective medium-paced

4.0


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