Reviews tagging 'Abandonment'

Dzień dobry, potworku. Historie z terapii, które inspirują do walki o samego siebie by Catherine Gildiner

45 reviews

serinehart's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful medium-paced

4.5

I think people's use of the label "trauma porn" is an expression of their own personal sensitivities and morality more than a helpful descriptor. This book is ultimately optimistic in showing therapeutic case studies of individuals who improved into better circumstances, which I found to be an emotional bolster, personally. The author does characterize these stories as those overcoming adversity. But I wonder if the public reception is positive because of the analytic lens to the detailed horrors of these individuals' lives of that of a health care worker. I'm thinking in contrast to Hanya Yanigahara's A Little Life, a work of fiction that describes a character's life details that are entirely similar to Gildiner's clients real lives. Is "trauma porn," i.e., the fear that we or others may get some perverse pleasure in the torture of others, only applicable to stories that are not real, that have a happy ending, or that are perceived to be handled by an author with good intent to serve some (read: higher) purpose? This was something I was thinking about while reading, due to it's obvious similarities to A Little Life and how the content of that book was received by the public as controversial. Which is not to defend "trauma porn" as a genre, but as a label, since it strikes me as entirely subjective. Or possibly symptomatic of a societal squeamishness with the details of trauma, and therefore a lack of understanding or being able to address it properly when it happens in our communities. And my moral sense personally is suspicious of censorship, which doesn't leave room for differences in reading experience or interpretation. But of course be mindful of your own sensitivities.

I've currently been reading and listening to podcasts on therapy cases and transcripts for their optimism and demonstrated conflict resolution in action, especially with how therapists honor people's emotional inner worlds and respond to most everything with compassion and respect, even when disagreeing. This one was challenging to read, but also reassuring in its level-headed approach to lived horrors and plotted progression of clients' improvements, suggesting that no one is so broken that their life cannot be improved. Of course this is an oversimplification, but something I hold on to to counteract my own depression.

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Animal cruelty, Child abuse, Confinement, Deadnaming, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Incest, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Torture, Transphobia, Vomit, Trafficking, Religious bigotry, and Abandonment

mari_teran's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective tense fast-paced

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Genocide, Incest, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racism, Rape, Self harm, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Death of parent, Gaslighting, and Abandonment

kellee's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad medium-paced

3.5

First of all, let me preface this by saying that I’m glad I read this book. It was hard to read at times, and content warnings for all sorts of abuse, but I regard Laura, Peter, Danny, Alana, and Madeline as people who deserve much much more than they were given as children, and they deserve to have their stories told, so I am glad to be a witness. My forthcoming review has more to do with the writing and Gildiner’s approach, which are the reasons why I ultimately gave it 3.5 stars. So, spoilers from here on.

I have several issues with this book. Gildiner wrote about how it was imperative that her clients be unrecognizable, and so I’m not sure how much was real or composited for each. Some explanations for their pathologies seemed a bit too simple, aka

Laura’s issues with her father leading to her choosing the wrong men, Peter’s emasculation due to his mother, Danny’s throat cancer due to his losing his first language, Alana fighting her father in the video game, and Madeline’s fear of abandonment due to her mother. Maybe it is that simple, but I would have appreciated more nuance.

Gildiner used a Freudian approach for her therapy in the 80s, which I imagine is not requisite anymore. However it was fascinating to read about, especially the dream interpretation. I also had an issue with her therapeutic approach in general, including her emotional involvement, and especially her sarcastic remarks; for example,

hearing about Madeline’s affair and her seemingly sardonic comment in the book, wondering if he was the one who brought them coffee.

One more quick thought before I wrap up; I listened to this on audio, and I did not enjoy the narrator’s characterizations or voices for Peter, who is Chinese, or Danny, who is Cree. I also felt some inherent bias from Gildiner (it was a different time, and she was born in 1948) but as someone who is AAPI, I am sensitive to Caucasian interpretations of AAPI experiences. I did appreciate that she acknowledged her limitations for Danny, but I struggled as to why she didn’t with Peter.

Lastly, I’m not sure how I feel about the term “psychological heroes.” It’s undeniable that Laura, Peter, Danny, Alana, and Madeline endured horrific childhoods, but I don’t know if I like that Gildiner put them on display as heroes. I don’t know if I can idealize any of them, since there’s no one can live up to those kinds of standards, but I <i>can</i> acknowledge their resilience and their strength. 

3.5 stars.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Sexual assault, and Abandonment

fanchera's review against another edition

challenging emotional hopeful informative reflective sad slow-paced

2.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Alcoholism, Cancer, Child abuse, Death, Emotional abuse, Incest, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Grief, Death of parent, and Abandonment

zoeysdigest's review against another edition

dark emotional hopeful informative inspiring reflective tense medium-paced

4.5

A very informative and moving read. It was easier to follow than Maybe you should talk to someone as the ‘case studies’ were clearly segmented, it was also less about the therapist’s own life. However, the characters had more triggering and extreme issues that made reading difficult at times. Would caution all to read up on the content warnings before proceeding.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Alcoholism, Body horror, Body shaming, Bullying, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Medical trauma, Suicide attempt, Gaslighting, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Sexual harassment

jiao_li's review against another edition

dark emotional inspiring reflective fast-paced

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Pedophilia, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Suicide attempt, and Abandonment

biojesspj's review against another edition

challenging emotional sad medium-paced

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse and Mental illness

Moderate: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Body shaming, Bullying, Cancer, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, Torture, Grief, Suicide attempt, Gaslighting, Abandonment, and Alcohol

Minor: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Domestic abuse, Vomit, and Death of parent

jams_is_rad's review against another edition

emotional inspiring reflective sad tense medium-paced

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Animal cruelty, Animal death, Cancer, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Incest, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Violence, Vomit, Grief, Suicide attempt, Murder, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , and Abandonment

allisonobrien's review against another edition

emotional hopeful inspiring reflective medium-paced

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Emotional abuse, Sexual assault, and Abandonment

koszulek's review

challenging emotional hopeful inspiring

5.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Adult/minor relationship, Animal death, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Incest, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual violence, Suicide attempt, Gaslighting, Abandonment, and Alcohol