Reviews tagging 'Drug abuse'

We Were Once a Family: A Story of Love, Death, and Child Removal in America by Roxanna Asgarian

21 reviews

ameliasbooks's review against another edition

dark emotional informative reflective sad medium-paced

4.5

Roxanna Asgarian’s *We Were Once a Family* offers an affecting and comprehensive look into the tragic story of the Hart family murders while shining a light on the systemic failures of the U.S. child welfare system. Rather than sensationalizing the crime or focusing on the adoptive mothers, Asgarian turns her attention to the true victims—the six adopted children and their biological families, whose lives were torn apart long before the horrifying deaths occurred.

One of the book's greatest strengths is its focus on the broader issues underlying this tragedy. Asgarian critiques a broken system that fails to provide adequate support to vulnerable families, particularly those from marginalized communities. The child welfare system, she argues, is not designed to solve the root causes of poverty and instability but is instead driven by racial bias, with a prevalent "white savior" mentality. The biological families of the children, mostly people of color, were repeatedly failed by institutions that seemed more interested in removing children from their homes than in providing the resources that could keep those families intact.

For readers unfamiliar with the U.S. child welfare system—particularly European readers—the book can feel overwhelming in its detailed analysis. However, this depth of information is essential for an American audience that needs to fully understand the systemic issues at play. Asgarian doesn’t just point to individual failures but to a larger pattern of neglect and exploitation built into the system itself.

The book is as devastating as it is informative, highlighting the human cost of a system driven by racist policies and a desire for quick, often harmful solutions. The stories of the biological families are heartbreaking and paint a clear picture of how institutional racism and economic inequality intersect to create such tragedies.

However, the book is not without its minor flaws. At times, there is noticeable repetition of certain details, which can give the impression that some chapters were originally published as standalone magazine articles. If this was the case, the book could have benefited from tighter editing to smooth these transitions and avoid redundancy. Despite this, Asgarian’s journalistic rigor and passion for the subject matter shine through, making this a crucial read.

In conclusion this book is a powerful and eye-opening investigation into a deeply flawed child welfare system. Though difficult to digest at times, it is an essential work that sheds light on the need for reform and justice for the victims and their families.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Child abuse, Child death, Confinement, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Miscarriage, Physical abuse, Racism, Suicide, Forced institutionalization, Medical content, Grief, Medical trauma, Car accident, Murder, Pregnancy, Abandonment, and Classism

oworthyfool's review

challenging dark emotional informative sad fast-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Child abuse, Child death, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Genocide, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Racism, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Medical content, Grief, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Murder, Pregnancy, Cultural appropriation, Gaslighting, Abandonment, Injury/Injury detail, Classism, and Pandemic/Epidemic

Moderate: Ableism, Homophobia, Miscarriage, and Cultural appropriation

hollydyer328's review

dark informative sad slow-paced

4.25

This is not a book that I usually read, but it was great investigative journalism done by Roxanna Asgarian. I thought she did a great job handling the case and recounting the stories of the birth families with sensitivity. This is a depiction not only of the tragic suicide-murder of the Hart family but also an exposing critique of the child welfare and foster system. There are parts that will definitely infuriate you and parts that will give you chills. I found myself glazing over the more legal explanations in the book. Overall, I’m glad that Asgarian was able to tell a more comprehensive story of this incident and honor the birth families in the process.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Child death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, and Suicide

Moderate: Homophobia and Racism

imstephtacular's review

challenging dark emotional informative sad tense medium-paced

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Racism, Toxic relationship, Violence, Medical content, Grief, Gaslighting, Injury/Injury detail, and Classism

Moderate: Ableism, Bullying, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Physical abuse, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Forced institutionalization, Police brutality, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Murder, Pregnancy, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Pandemic/Epidemic

Minor: Gun violence, Homophobia, Infidelity, Miscarriage, Racial slurs, and Lesbophobia

hailey_alexis's review against another edition

dark emotional informative sad slow-paced

3.5

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Alcoholism, Child abuse, Child death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Violence, and Suicide attempt

careinthelibrary's review

challenging dark emotional informative sad medium-paced

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Child abuse, Child death, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Racism, Forced institutionalization, Grief, Medical trauma, Murder, and Classism

Moderate: Confinement, Homophobia, Toxic relationship, and Lesbophobia

Minor: Suicide, Suicide attempt, and Pandemic/Epidemic

crabbytaco's review

challenging informative sad medium-paced

4.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child death, Suicide, and Murder

Moderate: Drug abuse

Minor: Homophobia

wyabook234's review against another edition

dark emotional informative sad medium-paced

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Racism, and Murder

Moderate: Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, and Classism

woyster's review against another edition

dark informative reflective medium-paced

3.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Child abuse and Child death

Minor: Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Suicide, and Car accident

carriepond's review

challenging emotional informative sad medium-paced

5.0

We Were Once a Family is extended investigative reporting that looks at the murder of six children of color by their adoptive mothers from the perspective of the birth families from whom the children were taken and the systems that treated those families with more skepticism than they treated the middle-class white women who would abuse and, ultimately, murder their children. It is a compelling, deeply researched, thoughtful, and damning look at systems that desperately fail at their purported mission of protecting children.

I could not put this book down. It is so good, so heartbreaking, and so well done that I couldn't stop thinking about it when I wasn't reading it, and I will think about it for a long time after finishing it. I want to talk to everyone about all of the issues that this book raises-- the racism, ableism, and classicism that are foundational to the operation of our child welfare systems, the misguided idea that the purpose of these systems should be to punish parents for wrongdoing rather than giving them the support they need to lift them and their children up (because, as Asgarian drives home so well, the ways we punish parents-- ripping children from family and all existing supports and normalcy-- punishes the children in ways that will detrimentally affect them for the rest of their lives), how our child welfare system serves as a pipeline to the juvenile justice system, which serves as a pipeline to the adult prison system (and how all of these systems contain a gross overrepresentation of people struggling with poverty, substance use, and mental illness), and how so much of this is a black hole for most people until they get entangled with one of these systems. Asgarian manages to explore all of these topics while telling a story that is also emotionally resonant, unputdownable, and beautifully told. 

This is me, pressing a copy of this book into your hands, urging you to read it.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Child death, Mental illness, Miscarriage, Racism, Forced institutionalization, Suicide attempt, and Murder

Minor: Drug abuse