A review by dpcorcoran
The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships by Harriet Lerner

3.0

My psychiatrist wanted me to read this. Not because I’m an angry person but because anxiety can stem from deep rooted things that cause anger. It’s an interesting concept that anxiety can equal anger. It’s not always correlated of course but still. There was some really great information about patterns in relationships when it comes to anxiety. For example, a relationship I have with a family member that isn’t the greatest is always the same arguments when we get together. This is explained by “repeating fights protects us from the anxieties of change.” So if we get used to the same fights because it’s familiar and we know the outcome. I think it’s also important instead of being defensive with someone about something you disagree on, you understand that different perspectives are good between people and realize that it doesn’t mean one of you is right and the other is wrong. There was a lot of stuff that I didn’t feel applied to myself in the book but I’m still glad I read it.