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A review by crystalstarrlight
A Caress of Twilight by Laurell K. Hamilton
2.0
"Quit drawing out the story"
Merry Gentry is Princess of the Unseelie Court and co-heir to the throne--if she can get pregnant. Which she and her harem of interchangeable men are trying very hard to accomplish.
One fine day at the Detective Agency that Merry works (despite being royalty that attracts paparazzi easier than a bald Britney Spears), a man enters. After lots of hemming and hawing--a standard LKH practice to pad out the story and make her MC look supa amazing--Merry finds out the guy is representing Maeve Reeds, a Faerie super star who was banished from the courts 100 years ago.
One chapter is dedicated to Merry and her men driving to Maeve's house. (I would have thought that by going to her house, they had already decided to talk to her, but what do I know.)
Two chapters are dedicated to Merry and her men arguing with Maeve's bodyguards to be let in.
One chapter is dedicated to Merry and her men entering the house, meeting Maeve, who runs off to the backyard.
Another couple of chapters pass before Merry finally nails Maeve to the floor (figuratively), and they FINALLY talk about the whole point of Maeve's request. What is this request? Maeve wants children; problem is, her husband is dying. Also, Maeve believes the Seelie infertility is due to King Taranis' own infertility.
"It was dark by the time we arrived back to my apartment." Well, after how long it took to freakin' get INTO THE HOUSE and how much time you wasted tip-toeing around Maeve, I'm somehow not surprised. Actually, no, I am surprised: how did you get home IN THE SAME DAY?
Most of the actual solution to the mystery involves Merry turning to one of her guards and asking questions. Some of the questions include:
"What does that mean?"
"Are you saying...?"
"What?"
"Why?"
"How?"
I think Merry really should switch fields. She'd make a good investigative reporter.
But the job with Maeve takes a backseat. Merry and Doyle finally get their freak on--and fade-to-black. Yes, in a supposed erotica book, we get a fade-to-black between two of the characters. Lemme tell you, I wasn't happy. In fact, I was so surprised/shocked/horrified, that I checked with a print copy to make sure I hadn't somehow gotten a hold of an abridged audiobook.
In between lots and lots of flirtation, talking about her love with all her men, Merry has a few other things on her mind: repairing Galan's junk, having sex with a butterfly-like man, Sage (at least, I pictured him as a butterfly), arguing with her mother (whom she hates, of course), arguing with Nicoden, arguing with Rosmerta, arguing with a guy named Hedwig, arguing with King Taranis...actually, if there is someone Merry can argue with in this book, she does it.
FINALLY, after what seems like forever, Merry does end up doing something about Maeve's infertility (which produces the most AMAZING quote EVAH: "More sex. We must have more sex"). And she and her Deus Ex Machina bodyguards find the solution to a bunch of murders that abruptly appear halfway through the novel. Oh, and Merry and her men level up.
Gratuitous cute cat image.
I'm really disappointed in this book for quite a few reasons:
1) For an erotica book, there is a severe lack of sex. There are maybe three sex scenes in this book--maybe. One sex scene is fade-to-black. Even Auel's "Plains of Passage", a historical fiction novel, had more sex than this book.
2) The sex scenes aren't sexy. If reading/hearing "spilling power" makes you all tingly, these are your books; otherwise, they are going to have you bored.
3) There is a ton of time wasting. It's like LKH knew she didn't have much of a story and included her characters arguing a lot to make up for the lack of pages. One of the more ridiculous cases is the beginning. The beginning interview with Maeve takes up a good half dozen chapters, which amounts to a couple of hours listening time. If there had been actual content to back up this usage, then maybe I wouldn't complain. But when Merry argues with her boys for a chapter over what they are going to do now that they are at Maeve's house, I can't see it as anything more than shameless padding.
4) The murders don't occur until about halfway through the book. How can you solve a mystery in half a book? And not make the solution sound cheap?
5) Merry's men know everything. Merry figures out who the murderer is by asking one of her men, who conveniently knows about the Elder Man. This is a guardsman she is talking to; not that he wouldn't know, but half the fun with the mystery is INVESTIGATING, not having solutions fall into the character's lap.
6) Merry comes off as an idiot. Merry will waste time by asking for clarification on the smallest things. I am not the sharpest tool in the shed; I've been called "gullible" and "dense" before. And yet *I* could figure out what was being said easier than Merry.
7) Political machinations r coolz. Well, they would be if they weren't intertwined with the 1 billion needless conversations that pad out this book.
8) Interchangeable men. There is little distinction between the men. Not that I exactly blame LKH: when you have 6 men, it's pretty hard to make each one a different unique character. So most of them are identifiable (if that) by one trait:
Galen -> Green eunuch *snipsnip*
Doyle -> Queen's "Darkness"
Frost -> Eyepatch
Nicca -> Long hair????
Kitto -> Small, childish, creepy goblin
Rhys -> Uhhhhhh...
9)
There are a few things that make this feel less like a sexy, erotica novel and more like the wet dreams of a 13 year old girl. The super long hair of the men. How every one is ripped and has a perfect body. Instead of reading this and being turned on, I feel like I'm walking in on...something...that...well...I think you get my point.
10) Show not Tell. Hand in hand with pretty much every point on this list is the "Show not tell" rule. In fact, if LKH had employed "Show not tell" more, I'll bet I wouldn't have 75% of the complaints. Because you can cut down on conversations, characters knowing things conveniently, etc. if you have your character DOING something, instead of sitting around talking about it.
11. Clothes porn. As with the Anita Blake series, the story stops to update the reader on what everyone is wearing. Apparently, this also includes hair and makeup now, because, in the beginning, we get a long explanation of what sort of makeup Merry is wearing :P
And because that has been a lot of negativity, let me tell you some things I DID like:
1) Merry is a much more likable character than Anita. She is still painfully similar to AB, but there were some significant differences. Merry isn't ashamed of sex; in fact, she enjoys it. She comes off commanding and powerful instead of b!tchy and belligerent. And I feel she has more respect for her clients and people around her, which in turn makes me respect her more.
2) Faerie. While the political machinations were tedious this time around, I am still impressed with how unique and varied they are. And I think, for the most part, they seem to be consistent and make sense.
While I am hugely disappointed in this particular entry, I am not abandoning Merry. She's a pretty decent character and the land of Faerie is pretty interesting. And I need to read that tentacle sex scene!
Merry Gentry is Princess of the Unseelie Court and co-heir to the throne--if she can get pregnant. Which she and her harem of interchangeable men are trying very hard to accomplish.
One fine day at the Detective Agency that Merry works (despite being royalty that attracts paparazzi easier than a bald Britney Spears), a man enters. After lots of hemming and hawing--a standard LKH practice to pad out the story and make her MC look supa amazing--Merry finds out the guy is representing Maeve Reeds, a Faerie super star who was banished from the courts 100 years ago.
One chapter is dedicated to Merry and her men driving to Maeve's house. (I would have thought that by going to her house, they had already decided to talk to her, but what do I know.)
Two chapters are dedicated to Merry and her men arguing with Maeve's bodyguards to be let in.
One chapter is dedicated to Merry and her men entering the house, meeting Maeve, who runs off to the backyard.
Another couple of chapters pass before Merry finally nails Maeve to the floor (figuratively), and they FINALLY talk about the whole point of Maeve's request. What is this request? Maeve wants children; problem is, her husband is dying. Also, Maeve believes the Seelie infertility is due to King Taranis' own infertility.
"It was dark by the time we arrived back to my apartment." Well, after how long it took to freakin' get INTO THE HOUSE and how much time you wasted tip-toeing around Maeve, I'm somehow not surprised. Actually, no, I am surprised: how did you get home IN THE SAME DAY?
Most of the actual solution to the mystery involves Merry turning to one of her guards and asking questions. Some of the questions include:
"What does that mean?"
"Are you saying...?"
"What?"
"Why?"
"How?"
I think Merry really should switch fields. She'd make a good investigative reporter.
But the job with Maeve takes a backseat. Merry and Doyle finally get their freak on--and fade-to-black. Yes, in a supposed erotica book, we get a fade-to-black between two of the characters. Lemme tell you, I wasn't happy. In fact, I was so surprised/shocked/horrified, that I checked with a print copy to make sure I hadn't somehow gotten a hold of an abridged audiobook.
In between lots and lots of flirtation, talking about her love with all her men, Merry has a few other things on her mind: repairing Galan's junk, having sex with a butterfly-like man, Sage (at least, I pictured him as a butterfly), arguing with her mother (whom she hates, of course), arguing with Nicoden, arguing with Rosmerta, arguing with a guy named Hedwig, arguing with King Taranis...actually, if there is someone Merry can argue with in this book, she does it.
FINALLY, after what seems like forever, Merry does end up doing something about Maeve's infertility (which produces the most AMAZING quote EVAH: "More sex. We must have more sex"). And she and her Deus Ex Machina bodyguards find the solution to a bunch of murders that abruptly appear halfway through the novel. Oh, and Merry and her men level up.
Gratuitous cute cat image.
I'm really disappointed in this book for quite a few reasons:
1) For an erotica book, there is a severe lack of sex. There are maybe three sex scenes in this book--maybe. One sex scene is fade-to-black. Even Auel's "Plains of Passage", a historical fiction novel, had more sex than this book.
2) The sex scenes aren't sexy. If reading/hearing "spilling power" makes you all tingly, these are your books; otherwise, they are going to have you bored.
3) There is a ton of time wasting. It's like LKH knew she didn't have much of a story and included her characters arguing a lot to make up for the lack of pages. One of the more ridiculous cases is the beginning. The beginning interview with Maeve takes up a good half dozen chapters, which amounts to a couple of hours listening time. If there had been actual content to back up this usage, then maybe I wouldn't complain. But when Merry argues with her boys for a chapter over what they are going to do now that they are at Maeve's house, I can't see it as anything more than shameless padding.
4) The murders don't occur until about halfway through the book. How can you solve a mystery in half a book? And not make the solution sound cheap?
5) Merry's men know everything. Merry figures out who the murderer is by asking one of her men, who conveniently knows about the Elder Man. This is a guardsman she is talking to; not that he wouldn't know, but half the fun with the mystery is INVESTIGATING, not having solutions fall into the character's lap.
6) Merry comes off as an idiot. Merry will waste time by asking for clarification on the smallest things. I am not the sharpest tool in the shed; I've been called "gullible" and "dense" before. And yet *I* could figure out what was being said easier than Merry.
7) Political machinations r coolz. Well, they would be if they weren't intertwined with the 1 billion needless conversations that pad out this book.
8) Interchangeable men. There is little distinction between the men. Not that I exactly blame LKH: when you have 6 men, it's pretty hard to make each one a different unique character. So most of them are identifiable (if that) by one trait:
Galen -> Green eunuch *snipsnip*
Doyle -> Queen's "Darkness"
Frost -> Eyepatch
Nicca -> Long hair????
Kitto -> Small, childish, creepy goblin
Rhys -> Uhhhhhh...
9)
There are a few things that make this feel less like a sexy, erotica novel and more like the wet dreams of a 13 year old girl. The super long hair of the men. How every one is ripped and has a perfect body. Instead of reading this and being turned on, I feel like I'm walking in on...something...that...well...I think you get my point.
10) Show not Tell. Hand in hand with pretty much every point on this list is the "Show not tell" rule. In fact, if LKH had employed "Show not tell" more, I'll bet I wouldn't have 75% of the complaints. Because you can cut down on conversations, characters knowing things conveniently, etc. if you have your character DOING something, instead of sitting around talking about it.
11. Clothes porn. As with the Anita Blake series, the story stops to update the reader on what everyone is wearing. Apparently, this also includes hair and makeup now, because, in the beginning, we get a long explanation of what sort of makeup Merry is wearing :P
And because that has been a lot of negativity, let me tell you some things I DID like:
1) Merry is a much more likable character than Anita. She is still painfully similar to AB, but there were some significant differences. Merry isn't ashamed of sex; in fact, she enjoys it. She comes off commanding and powerful instead of b!tchy and belligerent. And I feel she has more respect for her clients and people around her, which in turn makes me respect her more.
2) Faerie. While the political machinations were tedious this time around, I am still impressed with how unique and varied they are. And I think, for the most part, they seem to be consistent and make sense.
While I am hugely disappointed in this particular entry, I am not abandoning Merry. She's a pretty decent character and the land of Faerie is pretty interesting. And I need to read that tentacle sex scene!