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A review by queerlyread
Mistress Mage by Kayleigh Nicol
2.0
I'm not typically one to leave worded reviews, but this book was a case study in gaslighting and I have thoughts and emotions.
I'll preface by saying that I loved the first book. The worldbuilding, magic system, sibling power dynamics, the growth of Reshi as a capable mage while staying true to himself, and the push/pull enemies-to-lovers vibe between Reshi and Kestral was fantastic.
That said, Kestral is not a sympathetic character in this novel. In fact, there were multiple times when I wanted nothing more than for Reshi to run far, far away from him and never look back. That's saying something since I quite liked Kestral in the first book.
The other two low star reviews cover a lot of what I found frustrating, so I won't rehash those points, but I do want to speak to the strong undertone of gaslighting. Not only does it feel like Reshi is being gaslight by Kestral continuously throughout the entire book, but it feels like the novel is written so that we, as the reader, are being gaslit along with him. I am not a sheltered reader, and even I was not prepared.
We are told, over and over in Kestral's voice and various dialogue with other main characters, that every action is done because Kestral loves Reshi and never got closure. Looking at Kestral's actions proves this to be false. It's not about love. It's about ownership.
In the book,Kestral collars Reshi and cuts off his magic with the excuse that Reshi will run away before they can "talk" unless he is cut off from his shapeshifting magic. Somehow, he's convinced Reshi's two most sympathetic siblings, Kila and Nico, that this is okay. One agrees and is willing to help collar him, and the other allows Reshi wear the collar for far too long. Again, these are Reshi's two closest siblings. Not Velyn.
Then, about midway through the book, Kestral is angry at Reshi for being impulsive (a Reshi trait!) in a fight, and strikes him after the fight. Without warning. Hard.
"Reshi cut off as my fist met his jaw. I was careful to pull my punch enough not to break it but hard enough that it would serve as a reminder. I saw a fleeting expression of shock and betrayal before Reshi’s eyes turned hard."
This hit happens not only because Kestral is angry Reshi reacted to a threat without waiting for instruction, a very normal reaction for a scrappy street kid to have, but also because Kestral is frustrated that Reshi is resisting him and making his life difficult ever since he placed the collar around his neck. The others act as if it was Reshi who was out of line.
Even Kestral, for as much as he claims to love Reshi, doesn't seem trust him in moments where he's being genuinely vulnerable.
"For once, Reshi seemed at a loss for words. He dropped his gaze and shrugged, drawing in on himself. I had seen that tactic before. He was making himself look harmless, pitiable, even."
Reshi, in effect, becomes the punching bag. His companions throw nearly all of the blame for any woes the group encounters onto him. Kestral is at the center of this with his obsession to keep (also see: own) Reshi and his vocality about it leads the others to align with him to essentially rein Reshi in (which is a classic abuser tactic).
For about ~70% of the book we watch Reshi turn from someone who is confident and capable into a shadow of himself. He becomes increasingly fearful, guilt-ridden, and the panicked side of flightly. It builds to the point where, in the middle of a battle, Reshi looks to Kestral in clear conflict for permission when he wants to shapeshift.
I kept waiting for the way they treated Reshi to get better. I was so sure that it would, that Kestral would have a moment of self-awareness as to how much harm he was doing. But, because Reshi is Reshi and deflects everything with sass, it's heavily implied Reshi invited it on himself.
At 76%, after they've reached a fragile peace, we learn that Kestral kept the collar on his person for months.
"Slowly, I reached into my belt pouch, withdrawing the golden collar I still carried. In an eye blink, Reshi vanished, reappearing well away from me but still within bowshot. His eyes were wide, fearful, and he held his fae-blades before him. Rust, I couldn’t even get this part right. Before he could get any closer to running away, I flung the collar towards him, then backed up a pace, showing him my empty hands."
Remorse? Right? I doubt it, because at the end of the book, after they've made up without Kestral ever acknowledging how he treated Reshi, this is how the epilogue ends:
"He was never getting away from me now."
Overall, this book triggered me. It makes me sad, because the 30% of the book that wasn't heavily reliant on the above spoilered section had the making of a truly interesting story, but it became increasingly difficult for me to look past how upset I was at Reshi's treatment. I was truly looking forward to spending more time in this world.
The first book had me absolutely hooked, and I devoured it, to the point where I only paused to send my friends a barrage of texts about how fascinating I found Reshi, all his siblings, and their magic. I just wish that the nuances of love, both familial and romantic, when it walks the line of toxicity had been treated with more care in this book.
I'll preface by saying that I loved the first book. The worldbuilding, magic system, sibling power dynamics, the growth of Reshi as a capable mage while staying true to himself, and the push/pull enemies-to-lovers vibe between Reshi and Kestral was fantastic.
That said, Kestral is not a sympathetic character in this novel. In fact, there were multiple times when I wanted nothing more than for Reshi to run far, far away from him and never look back. That's saying something since I quite liked Kestral in the first book.
The other two low star reviews cover a lot of what I found frustrating, so I won't rehash those points, but I do want to speak to the strong undertone of gaslighting. Not only does it feel like Reshi is being gaslight by Kestral continuously throughout the entire book, but it feels like the novel is written so that we, as the reader, are being gaslit along with him. I am not a sheltered reader, and even I was not prepared.
We are told, over and over in Kestral's voice and various dialogue with other main characters, that every action is done because Kestral loves Reshi and never got closure. Looking at Kestral's actions proves this to be false. It's not about love. It's about ownership.
In the book,
Then, about midway through the book, Kestral is angry at Reshi for being impulsive (a Reshi trait!) in a fight, and strikes him after the fight. Without warning. Hard.
"Reshi cut off as my fist met his jaw. I was careful to pull my punch enough not to break it but hard enough that it would serve as a reminder. I saw a fleeting expression of shock and betrayal before Reshi’s eyes turned hard."
This hit happens not only because Kestral is angry Reshi reacted to a threat without waiting for instruction, a very normal reaction for a scrappy street kid to have, but also because Kestral is frustrated that Reshi is resisting him and making his life difficult ever since he placed the collar around his neck. The others act as if it was Reshi who was out of line.
Even Kestral, for as much as he claims to love Reshi, doesn't seem trust him in moments where he's being genuinely vulnerable.
"For once, Reshi seemed at a loss for words. He dropped his gaze and shrugged, drawing in on himself. I had seen that tactic before. He was making himself look harmless, pitiable, even."
Reshi, in effect, becomes the punching bag. His companions throw nearly all of the blame for any woes the group encounters onto him. Kestral is at the center of this with his obsession to keep (also see: own) Reshi and his vocality about it leads the others to align with him to essentially rein Reshi in (which is a classic abuser tactic).
For about ~70% of the book we watch Reshi turn from someone who is confident and capable into a shadow of himself. He becomes increasingly fearful, guilt-ridden, and the panicked side of flightly. It builds to the point where, in the middle of a battle, Reshi looks to Kestral in clear conflict for permission when he wants to shapeshift.
I kept waiting for the way they treated Reshi to get better. I was so sure that it would, that Kestral would have a moment of self-awareness as to how much harm he was doing. But, because Reshi is Reshi and deflects everything with sass, it's heavily implied Reshi invited it on himself.
At 76%, after they've reached a fragile peace, we learn that Kestral kept the collar on his person for months.
"Slowly, I reached into my belt pouch, withdrawing the golden collar I still carried. In an eye blink, Reshi vanished, reappearing well away from me but still within bowshot. His eyes were wide, fearful, and he held his fae-blades before him. Rust, I couldn’t even get this part right. Before he could get any closer to running away, I flung the collar towards him, then backed up a pace, showing him my empty hands."
Remorse? Right? I doubt it, because at the end of the book, after they've made up without Kestral ever acknowledging how he treated Reshi, this is how the epilogue ends:
"He was never getting away from me now."
Overall, this book triggered me. It makes me sad, because the 30% of the book that wasn't heavily reliant on the above spoilered section had the making of a truly interesting story, but it became increasingly difficult for me to look past how upset I was at Reshi's treatment. I was truly looking forward to spending more time in this world.
The first book had me absolutely hooked, and I devoured it, to the point where I only paused to send my friends a barrage of texts about how fascinating I found Reshi, all his siblings, and their magic. I just wish that the nuances of love, both familial and romantic, when it walks the line of toxicity had been treated with more care in this book.