A review by desiraesdesk
The Mother by Pearl S. Buck
5.0
I’ve had this book for years and finally read it, finishing within a week. I think I needed to read this book at this time in my life as I’m becoming more reflective of my roles in certain relationships.
I really like how this story is driven by routine (?) rather than a defined goal/mission. We follow a farming family set in rural China as communism is beginning to take root.
The protagonist is a woman who is only ever referred to as her current familial role: good wife, daughter in law, mother, mother in law. We never learn her name. We watch her family unit fall apart as her husband abandons them (she, 3 children, and his own mother) and how she must take care of them and the farm. However, as her children become the adults, we see how she is basically demoted from the family head to a near burden who is treated like a child.
While reading, I can’t pinpoint where my feelings of support for the young mother changed into resentment as she became an old woman. In her youth, I applauded her for making the difficult decisions necessary for her survival but as she aged she couldn’t seem to understand the outcomes/consequences of her decisions. One son is berated for living the life she’s lived while the other is spoiled for living the life she’s always wanted. But she doesn’t even know that these are the reasons why she hold them so differently in her heart.
At the end of the story I began to feel more pity for her, but when she finally got a “win” I don’t feel all too happy for her because of the misery she’s caused and the delusions she’s living in. She’s is an entirely different person at the end of the story, the transition almost too quick to notice, which I guess I can pinpoint. She begins to change drastically when she shifts from mother/head of household, to mother/mother in law/old woman. She who once made all of the decisions for a lifetime is now simply entertained when she speaks, a kooky old lady who chatters nonstop. A full circle moment.
I recommend, over and over again. Lots of frustrating moments, much more than pleasant ones, but so.. relatable.
I really like how this story is driven by routine (?) rather than a defined goal/mission. We follow a farming family set in rural China as communism is beginning to take root.
The protagonist is a woman who is only ever referred to as her current familial role: good wife, daughter in law, mother, mother in law. We never learn her name. We watch her family unit fall apart as her husband abandons them (she, 3 children, and his own mother) and how she must take care of them and the farm. However, as her children become the adults, we see how she is basically demoted from the family head to a near burden who is treated like a child.
While reading, I can’t pinpoint where my feelings of support for the young mother changed into resentment as she became an old woman. In her youth, I applauded her for making the difficult decisions necessary for her survival but as she aged she couldn’t seem to understand the outcomes/consequences of her decisions. One son is berated for living the life she’s lived while the other is spoiled for living the life she’s always wanted. But she doesn’t even know that these are the reasons why she hold them so differently in her heart.
At the end of the story I began to feel more pity for her, but when she finally got a “win” I don’t feel all too happy for her because of the misery she’s caused and the delusions she’s living in. She’s is an entirely different person at the end of the story, the transition almost too quick to notice, which I guess I can pinpoint. She begins to change drastically when she shifts from mother/head of household, to mother/mother in law/old woman. She who once made all of the decisions for a lifetime is now simply entertained when she speaks, a kooky old lady who chatters nonstop. A full circle moment.
I recommend, over and over again. Lots of frustrating moments, much more than pleasant ones, but so.. relatable.