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A review by daeus
More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory by Franklin Veaux, Eve Rickert
4.0
Really fascinating insights into relationships of all forms and varieties.
Quotes
- "If we make others responsible for our emotions, we introduce coercion into the relationship, and coercion erodes consent."
- "One way to damage a relationship is to believe that your sense or self or self worth comes from your partner or being in a relationship. If you constantly seek reinforcement of your worth from your partner, your partner becomes your source of worth, rather than your equal. This kind of codependence is exhausting for your partner and destructive for you. This is especially likely to happen if you have trouble setting boundaries. Fuzzy boundaries can lead to a loss of self identity and an inability to tell where you self and your responsibility to set your own boundaries ends and your partner begins."
- "An empowered relationship is not necessarily one in which everyone has equal power, rather is one in which no one is disempowered, intentionally or unintentionall by hierarchical structure. Empowerment is not equality....a more rational take on equality might mean that everyone has equal power to choose how they run their lives."
- "Gratitude is a powerful shield against jealous and fear."
- "If you feel an unexpected negative emotion, say so calmly and clearly, be willing to set boundaries without having a temper tantrum... remember it's only by playing nicely that you get to play again. Its better to end feeling there is more you wanted to do than you went too far."
Quotes
- "If we make others responsible for our emotions, we introduce coercion into the relationship, and coercion erodes consent."
- "One way to damage a relationship is to believe that your sense or self or self worth comes from your partner or being in a relationship. If you constantly seek reinforcement of your worth from your partner, your partner becomes your source of worth, rather than your equal. This kind of codependence is exhausting for your partner and destructive for you. This is especially likely to happen if you have trouble setting boundaries. Fuzzy boundaries can lead to a loss of self identity and an inability to tell where you self and your responsibility to set your own boundaries ends and your partner begins."
- "An empowered relationship is not necessarily one in which everyone has equal power, rather is one in which no one is disempowered, intentionally or unintentionall by hierarchical structure. Empowerment is not equality....a more rational take on equality might mean that everyone has equal power to choose how they run their lives."
- "Gratitude is a powerful shield against jealous and fear."
- "If you feel an unexpected negative emotion, say so calmly and clearly, be willing to set boundaries without having a temper tantrum... remember it's only by playing nicely that you get to play again. Its better to end feeling there is more you wanted to do than you went too far."