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A review by mirandaleighhhh
Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: And Other Lessons from the Crematory by Caitlin Doughty
funny
informative
medium-paced
4.0
This year I'm reading more about grief, death, and dying to try to confront and make peace with my death anxiety. Off the heels of Staring at the Sun by Irvin Yalom (which I did not care for) this was fantastic. I want to pick up a physical copy so I can annotate the parts I found most comforting and inspiring.
It was also pretty gross! But no grosser, I think, than being alive and having a body. I was surprised to hear that there are death industry "secrets" - WHY? I whole-heartedly agree that the stark separation we have from death in the modern day is a tragic disservice to us all. This book reminded me that I am a person and an animal and part of the earth, and I have a place in it all both in life and in death. I look forward to reading more of Doughty's work.
I didn't love the way she spoke about individuals who have died by suicide, but I don't think it was malicious and I did not get the impression that she is insensitive or uncaring - more the opposite. She is both giving it to us straight and weaving in her own anxieties surrounding death.
"In this way, my body's decomposition would also be a banquet. My corpse would not be a disgusting source of corruption, but a source of life, dispensing molecules and creating new creatures. It would be the finest acknowledgement that I was but one tiny cog in the ecosystems wheel. A blip in the majestic workings of the natural world. We all know how this story turned out. In spite of my fear of living, I chose not to die."
It was also pretty gross! But no grosser, I think, than being alive and having a body. I was surprised to hear that there are death industry "secrets" - WHY? I whole-heartedly agree that the stark separation we have from death in the modern day is a tragic disservice to us all. This book reminded me that I am a person and an animal and part of the earth, and I have a place in it all both in life and in death. I look forward to reading more of Doughty's work.
I didn't love the way she spoke about individuals who have died by suicide, but I don't think it was malicious and I did not get the impression that she is insensitive or uncaring - more the opposite. She is both giving it to us straight and weaving in her own anxieties surrounding death.
"In this way, my body's decomposition would also be a banquet. My corpse would not be a disgusting source of corruption, but a source of life, dispensing molecules and creating new creatures. It would be the finest acknowledgement that I was but one tiny cog in the ecosystems wheel. A blip in the majestic workings of the natural world. We all know how this story turned out. In spite of my fear of living, I chose not to die."
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Death, and Medical content