Scan barcode
A review by kell_xavi
The Friend by Sigrid Nunez
dark
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.0
I sought a story of about animal companionship, understanding of a dog’s world alongside a human one. More than anticipated, this is a book about grieving a man: one the narrator has known and loved for many years, but whose bigotry and sexist narcissism are the prevailing qualities that come across in description. The narrator seems to comprehend this, without contemplating it, of the currents of her grief; instead, she turns to Apollo the Great Dane, and grows a new love from the disquiet come over her.
I enjoyed many of the literary connections Nunez and the narrator, herself a writer and professor, make. I don’t tend to pick up writing about writing, but the perspective of an older woman, well-read and used to both capturing her feelings and parsing them through writing (hers, other authors’), made sense here as an opening. Grief, love, pets, ownership, devotion, attention, death: these are all subjects that are heavily present in literature and in our lives. This short novel is both a simple one as it repeats, mirrors them, and one that stirs and enriches the reader. The woman and the dog both dedicated to another, the woman and man both in authority, the reflection of the woman on each role and companion also a flicker of light on herself. At the same time, this continues to be a story of a friendship between human and dog, one that epitomizes the Rilke quote about love being two solitudes that greet each other.
At the close of this novel, I wanted it to continue. There were many parts, however, that I didn’t enjoy. There’s a grossness to both men and animals, there’s a sustained apology for it, that I found it difficult to approach. On reflection, there's intention to the exploration of both, and to the comparison: what will we tolerate, even accept, in men and dogs, when it is disturbing or immoral, gross or degrading? When is the flaw not worth the reward? While I was not indifferent to this study insightful, and found it insightful, I also desired more of some parts and less of others in The Friend.
I enjoyed many of the literary connections Nunez and the narrator, herself a writer and professor, make. I don’t tend to pick up writing about writing, but the perspective of an older woman, well-read and used to both capturing her feelings and parsing them through writing (hers, other authors’), made sense here as an opening. Grief, love, pets, ownership, devotion, attention, death: these are all subjects that are heavily present in literature and in our lives. This short novel is both a simple one as it repeats, mirrors them, and one that stirs and enriches the reader. The woman and the dog both dedicated to another, the woman and man both in authority, the reflection of the woman on each role and companion also a flicker of light on herself. At the same time, this continues to be a story of a friendship between human and dog, one that epitomizes the Rilke quote about love being two solitudes that greet each other.
At the close of this novel, I wanted it to continue. There were many parts, however, that I didn’t enjoy. There’s a grossness to both men and animals, there’s a sustained apology for it, that I found it difficult to approach. On reflection, there's intention to the exploration of both, and to the comparison: what will we tolerate, even accept, in men and dogs, when it is disturbing or immoral, gross or degrading? When is the flaw not worth the reward? While I was not indifferent to this study insightful, and found it insightful, I also desired more of some parts and less of others in The Friend.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Suicide and Trafficking