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A review by gracer
Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
fast-paced
5.0
This is the rare book that entirely lives up to the hype that it has created.
Unfortunately for me, I read it on a kindle library book, and now I can't seem to access my notes anywhere. (Not through goodreads and not through the Libby app, I've read all the FAQs and questions, I swear.) Oh well. This is probably going to be a re-read at some point anyway.
This book is exceptional: Zauner writes about the tragic loss of her much-too-young mother and manages to strike a perfect tone. It isn't whiny or complainy. It isn't cold and distanced. It isn't overly indulgent. She seamlessly combines everything: memories of childhood visits to South Korea, where her mother is from; growing up Asian-American in the small city of Eugene; the sort of angst and frustration and rebelliousness that is often born of youth early adulthood; and the grave, bleak diagnosis of mother and her mother's subsequent treatment and care.
Furthermore, she does not shy away from the awful things -- terrible words members of the family sometimes said to each other, reasons she rebelled -- and then she does an exceptional job of showing the love of the family despite these things. She reminds us that families can sometimes cause any of us the most unbelievable pain, even the "best" ones. As I read this book, I thought that in many ways this would be a good book for a new parent to read, as an example of what not to do but also as a reminder that no one is perfect, that parents have been making mistakes for as long as there have been parents and not all parents are horrible for it.
She dances so gracefully around the complicated topic of her father, with whom she has a complicated and even resentful relationship. She addresses her issues but is at the same time very respectful, and all the while the book is dedicated completely to her mother - none of the father complications take a way from that, it is still only through the lens of her mother and her mother's death.
There is also so much food writing in this. I suppose that is somewhat implied by the title, but discreetly so, I would say, and nicely done. Be warned, you'll get hungry. But food is just another mediary through which Zauner navigates not only her identity and her relationship with her mother; it's also a reflection of her emotional changes throughout her mother's illness. It ties everything together.
When I started reading this book, I hadn't made it far before I found a line about growing up without a diaspora that really resonated with me. I wish I could find my notes and highlights now! I knew I was in for something good, and it just continued to be that. Even though it's such a tough and serious topic, it never dragged me down. I found this book so easy to read, like I just glided through it, stopping only to highlight striking phrases. Just beautiful. It lives up to the hype. I'm in awe of what Zauner did here. Read it.
Unfortunately for me, I read it on a kindle library book, and now I can't seem to access my notes anywhere. (Not through goodreads and not through the Libby app, I've read all the FAQs and questions, I swear.) Oh well. This is probably going to be a re-read at some point anyway.
This book is exceptional: Zauner writes about the tragic loss of her much-too-young mother and manages to strike a perfect tone. It isn't whiny or complainy. It isn't cold and distanced. It isn't overly indulgent. She seamlessly combines everything: memories of childhood visits to South Korea, where her mother is from; growing up Asian-American in the small city of Eugene; the sort of angst and frustration and rebelliousness that is often born of youth early adulthood; and the grave, bleak diagnosis of mother and her mother's subsequent treatment and care.
Furthermore, she does not shy away from the awful things -- terrible words members of the family sometimes said to each other, reasons she rebelled -- and then she does an exceptional job of showing the love of the family despite these things. She reminds us that families can sometimes cause any of us the most unbelievable pain, even the "best" ones. As I read this book, I thought that in many ways this would be a good book for a new parent to read, as an example of what not to do but also as a reminder that no one is perfect, that parents have been making mistakes for as long as there have been parents and not all parents are horrible for it.
She dances so gracefully around the complicated topic of her father, with whom she has a complicated and even resentful relationship. She addresses her issues but is at the same time very respectful, and all the while the book is dedicated completely to her mother - none of the father complications take a way from that, it is still only through the lens of her mother and her mother's death.
There is also so much food writing in this. I suppose that is somewhat implied by the title, but discreetly so, I would say, and nicely done. Be warned, you'll get hungry. But food is just another mediary through which Zauner navigates not only her identity and her relationship with her mother; it's also a reflection of her emotional changes throughout her mother's illness. It ties everything together.
When I started reading this book, I hadn't made it far before I found a line about growing up without a diaspora that really resonated with me. I wish I could find my notes and highlights now! I knew I was in for something good, and it just continued to be that. Even though it's such a tough and serious topic, it never dragged me down. I found this book so easy to read, like I just glided through it, stopping only to highlight striking phrases. Just beautiful. It lives up to the hype. I'm in awe of what Zauner did here. Read it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Cancer, Terminal illness, Grief, Medical trauma, and Death of parent
Moderate: Alcoholism
Minor: Drug abuse and Car accident