A review by enbeefinery
Dear Life: A Doctor's Story of Love and Loss by Rachel Clarke

emotional hopeful informative inspiring sad medium-paced

5.0

”’Maybe,’ I speculated sleepily, ‘you only really appreciate the joy of being alive when you accept that all of it, every single one of your experiences, is destined to be lost. That’s when you savour it. Maybe death makes us love life.’”

I think it’s safe to say this book changed my life for ever, and for the better.

I have always viewed my own death, as something inevitable, and have never feared it. However, losing a loved one has always been my biggest fear, and despite all the loses I have experienced (from an early age), I have not yet been able to wrap my head around the idea of someone being there for a second, and not for the next. Just the thought of losing someone I care for again tears me down, and that exactly, is why I think Rachel Clarke did a great job in depicting the unbearable pain of losing a loved one, and how hard it is, no matter who you are and what your experiences are. According to her, even a palliative care specialist will struggle to accept losing one she dearly loves. Reading this book, on one hand, reminded me that I’m not weak for breaking into pieces by losing a loved one, and in fact, no one is. No matter how inevitable and ‘there’ death is, it is a complicated process, and accepting and moving on from it, is not easy. On the other hand, I got to view death from the dying eyes and came to realise I’m not the only one suffering from a loved one’s death, and they too have a whole lot to process. I hope and believe this experience will help me throughout my grieving journeys, both those I need to end, and those that are yet to come. 

All in all, I now have a new favourite author, and a brand new perspective on life, or maybe death, both of which I truly appreciate. Can’t wait to read Breathtaking: Inside the NHS in a Time of Pandemic.