A review by corncobwebs
Absolutely Positively Not by David LaRochelle
Funny & realistic coming-out story from the point of view of Minnesotan high schooler. I just finished this in the car on our way to Cleveland, I'll try to remember to post a more detailed review later!!
***
Steven has spent his high school career trying hard not to be noticed. This is especially true since his primary hobby is square-dancing on Monday nights with his mom in a town where hockey is king. If the kids at his school knew he was a square dancer, he’d get the shit kicked out of him for sure - so he tries to keep a low profile. That generally works well for him, except he’s starting to feel certain urges that he can’t ignore. The new substitute teacher in his health class is looking pretty appealing, which horrifies Steven. Not that he hasn’t noticed guys before, but the new teacher has Steven whipped up into a frenzy like never before. Steven fights his gay thoughts with everything he has, mostly by trying to show the world how heterosexual and macho he is. He clips out every picture of a half-dressed woman he can find and plasters them to his notebooks and the walls in his room. He tries sitting at the jock table at lunch, hoping that some of their macho energy will rub off on him. And he starts dating every girl that will look his way, hoping that one of them will finally stir up some romantic feelings. These tactics have mixed success; while Steven becomes more popular because of his serial dating, he’s still decidedly attracted to guys. And in his quest not to be gay, he’s totally alienated his best friend, Rachel.
Steven’s finally forced to confront his homosexuality after a horribly botched date with the hot Norwegian exchange student. She tries to have sex with him, which is about as appealing to Steven as having a root canal. He drudges up some lame excuse about coming down with the flu, and the exchange student drives him home as he stews under a cloud of humiliation and shame. The good thing? Steven decides it’s finally time to tell Rachel the truth. He suspects that his own parents are relatively clueless, so opening up to Rachel seems like a good way to start the coming-out process. The only problem - and it’s kind of a big one - is that Rachel is a little too excited. She startles Steven by squealing that she knew all along, and then outright alarms him with her announcement that she plans to start a gay-straight alliance - with him as co-chair. Steven is barely ready to admit to himself that he’s gay, let alone the whole student body. He’s able to tamp down her enthusiasm about the GSA, but then she cooks up a new scheme: Steven will attend prom with Rachel’s golden retriever as his date, which would (theoretically) send the message that they laugh in the face of dating conventions. This scheme complicates Steven’s life tenfold, because it means he has to lie to his parents about his plans for prom, on top of keeping his sexuality a secret. The big question is: Will Steven finally be able to come out to his parents and his community? Will he finally feel okay with himself?
The book gets progressively funnier as the story goes on, mostly because of the elaborate lies Steven has to construct to keep his gayness a secret. I loved reading a lighthearted book about coming out that was also reasonably realistic - Steven still encounters homophobia, but seems to be able to handle it good-naturedly. I would recommend this to anyone looking for a good coming-out story or a funny realistic fiction book.
***
Steven has spent his high school career trying hard not to be noticed. This is especially true since his primary hobby is square-dancing on Monday nights with his mom in a town where hockey is king. If the kids at his school knew he was a square dancer, he’d get the shit kicked out of him for sure - so he tries to keep a low profile. That generally works well for him, except he’s starting to feel certain urges that he can’t ignore. The new substitute teacher in his health class is looking pretty appealing, which horrifies Steven. Not that he hasn’t noticed guys before, but the new teacher has Steven whipped up into a frenzy like never before. Steven fights his gay thoughts with everything he has, mostly by trying to show the world how heterosexual and macho he is. He clips out every picture of a half-dressed woman he can find and plasters them to his notebooks and the walls in his room. He tries sitting at the jock table at lunch, hoping that some of their macho energy will rub off on him. And he starts dating every girl that will look his way, hoping that one of them will finally stir up some romantic feelings. These tactics have mixed success; while Steven becomes more popular because of his serial dating, he’s still decidedly attracted to guys. And in his quest not to be gay, he’s totally alienated his best friend, Rachel.
Steven’s finally forced to confront his homosexuality after a horribly botched date with the hot Norwegian exchange student. She tries to have sex with him, which is about as appealing to Steven as having a root canal. He drudges up some lame excuse about coming down with the flu, and the exchange student drives him home as he stews under a cloud of humiliation and shame. The good thing? Steven decides it’s finally time to tell Rachel the truth. He suspects that his own parents are relatively clueless, so opening up to Rachel seems like a good way to start the coming-out process. The only problem - and it’s kind of a big one - is that Rachel is a little too excited. She startles Steven by squealing that she knew all along, and then outright alarms him with her announcement that she plans to start a gay-straight alliance - with him as co-chair. Steven is barely ready to admit to himself that he’s gay, let alone the whole student body. He’s able to tamp down her enthusiasm about the GSA, but then she cooks up a new scheme: Steven will attend prom with Rachel’s golden retriever as his date, which would (theoretically) send the message that they laugh in the face of dating conventions. This scheme complicates Steven’s life tenfold, because it means he has to lie to his parents about his plans for prom, on top of keeping his sexuality a secret. The big question is: Will Steven finally be able to come out to his parents and his community? Will he finally feel okay with himself?
The book gets progressively funnier as the story goes on, mostly because of the elaborate lies Steven has to construct to keep his gayness a secret. I loved reading a lighthearted book about coming out that was also reasonably realistic - Steven still encounters homophobia, but seems to be able to handle it good-naturedly. I would recommend this to anyone looking for a good coming-out story or a funny realistic fiction book.