A review by firstiteration
100 Times: A Memoir of Sexism by Chavisa Woods
4.0
Chavisa Woods’ 100 Times: A Memoir of Sexism has a straightforward structure: Woods writes, in chronological order, 100 instances of sexism she has experienced or observed. The majority of these instances involve either verbal or physical sexual harassment, in private and public, including assault and attempted rape.
Woods makes the most of the book’s format by using it to show just how relentless sexism can be in the lives of women. Her writing is conversational and not at all academic. Reading this book feels like talking to a friend and having that friend confide in you. This writing style paired with her chronological arrangement of the subject matter really helps the reader understand the mental and emotional weight of sexist harassment.
For me, the section of the book with the most impact was number 97. In this section, Woods listens to a man at a bar acknowledge the statistical fact that the leading cause of death for pregnant women in the U.S. is violence from their male partners. He acknowledges this, but still implicates these women in their own deaths because “there’s two sides to that.” He states they must have done something to “push” their male partners to kill them. He acknowledges the rate of women being murdered, but insists that it’s women who actually have power over men. Somehow.
While reading this section, I remembered a much earlier one: number 25. In this section, a nineteen year old man in Woods’ hometown murdered himself and the daughter he’d had with his eighteen year old ex-wife. The murder-suicide was speculated to be his way of getting back at his ex-wife for divorcing him and for having a new partner who would assist in raising their child. And yet, despite having had no hand in the violence herself, there is an attitude in the town that the ex-wife somehow caused it by not sticking it out with her ex-husband. Why isn’t this man being held solely responsible for his own violence? Why would anyone think things would have been better if this woman had forced herself to stay with a man proved himself to be capable of such violence that he killed his own child? With her writing of these sections, Woods is laying plain just how distorted and unhealthy North American society is when it comes to gendered violence.
It was also notable for me as a lesbian that Woods wrote openly about the lesbophobic harassment she has received. Sometimes heterosexual women assume that lesbians don’t have to endure as much sexism or misogyny because we do not partner with men. The world at large sometimes seems to assumes that homophobic violence is only ever directed at men. This book shows how untrue this is. Lesbian women still have male family members, friends, and colleagues. We encounter men when we go out in public every day. While we have come a long way in terms of human rights, I still see news stories every year about lesbian (or bi or queer) women who are violently attacked for their sexuality.
100 Times is a deceptively simple book. It is clearly written and easy to read, but it hits hard. It’s the kind of book that sticks with you long after reading it. I’m hoping to see it on various recommended book lists of 2019.
Woods makes the most of the book’s format by using it to show just how relentless sexism can be in the lives of women. Her writing is conversational and not at all academic. Reading this book feels like talking to a friend and having that friend confide in you. This writing style paired with her chronological arrangement of the subject matter really helps the reader understand the mental and emotional weight of sexist harassment.
For me, the section of the book with the most impact was number 97. In this section, Woods listens to a man at a bar acknowledge the statistical fact that the leading cause of death for pregnant women in the U.S. is violence from their male partners. He acknowledges this, but still implicates these women in their own deaths because “there’s two sides to that.” He states they must have done something to “push” their male partners to kill them. He acknowledges the rate of women being murdered, but insists that it’s women who actually have power over men. Somehow.
While reading this section, I remembered a much earlier one: number 25. In this section, a nineteen year old man in Woods’ hometown murdered himself and the daughter he’d had with his eighteen year old ex-wife. The murder-suicide was speculated to be his way of getting back at his ex-wife for divorcing him and for having a new partner who would assist in raising their child. And yet, despite having had no hand in the violence herself, there is an attitude in the town that the ex-wife somehow caused it by not sticking it out with her ex-husband. Why isn’t this man being held solely responsible for his own violence? Why would anyone think things would have been better if this woman had forced herself to stay with a man proved himself to be capable of such violence that he killed his own child? With her writing of these sections, Woods is laying plain just how distorted and unhealthy North American society is when it comes to gendered violence.
It was also notable for me as a lesbian that Woods wrote openly about the lesbophobic harassment she has received. Sometimes heterosexual women assume that lesbians don’t have to endure as much sexism or misogyny because we do not partner with men. The world at large sometimes seems to assumes that homophobic violence is only ever directed at men. This book shows how untrue this is. Lesbian women still have male family members, friends, and colleagues. We encounter men when we go out in public every day. While we have come a long way in terms of human rights, I still see news stories every year about lesbian (or bi or queer) women who are violently attacked for their sexuality.
100 Times is a deceptively simple book. It is clearly written and easy to read, but it hits hard. It’s the kind of book that sticks with you long after reading it. I’m hoping to see it on various recommended book lists of 2019.