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A review by graceburts
Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella
2.0
This is the worst book I’ve ever read.
Okay, objectively I know that I’ve read much worse books. The writing and plot of this book are not the worst I’ve ever read and it’s readable unlike some other books I’ve read but I didn’t hate those as much as I hate this. I hate this book. And yes, I know hate is a strong word and I shouldn’t waste my energy on hating a book when that energy could go to reading books that I will end up loving but this book hurt me. This book offended me so deeply and there’s no other word to use. I hate it. I hate the way it’s made me feel.
Finding Audrey is about a girl who is so crippled by her anxiety that she can’t leave her house. She hasn’t been to school in months because of extenuating circumstances, hasn’t talked to any of her classmates or friends, can’t even look her family members in the eye… until she meets her brother’s friend, Linus and then she magically gets better…. Or something.
I really thought I was going to relate to this book.
Tragically, I was recommended this book by my therapist, who I was seeing for anxiety…. So, yeah, I was expecting this book to be good rep and hopefully give me some sort of comfort and a story to look to for hope when my anxiety got the best of me. I didn’t get that. This book is a sorry excuse for representation and I can not believe how atrociously the author handled this topic.
I think it goes without saying that the ‘boy fixes girl’ trope is over done and highly problematic and just unrealistic. Not to mention in this book it makes absolutely no sense. It all happens so fast; you can’t even call what Audrey goes through development. The plot progression is stilted and the character development suffers because of it. For example, one minute, Audrey can’t talk to Linus at all, doesn’t want him in the house and has to write notes in order to speak to him and the next they’re making out. I’m not joking, on the same exact page she can’t look at him and then one paragraph later they are swapping spit. Or, she can’t leave the house and then she’s going to Starbucks. Granted she does panic over this. The whole way to Starbucks she’s panicking and then we get to Starbucks and she can easily talk to the barista without so much as a batted eye…. I don’t get it. Or even better, Linus tells her to go talk to random people at Starbucks and she just does it…? And then feels better afterwards and can do it again and again. I’m sorry but that’s not how anxiety works. Just because you manage to do something that causes you anxiety once doesn’t mean the anxiety goes away the next time you try to do it… it’s always there and portraying it as this thing that can be so easily overcome is really insensitive.
Not to mention, we don’t get to know Linus at all. I’m not kidding, I couldn’t even tell you if he has any siblings. All we know is that he plays video games and he’s Audrey’s brothers friend. His literal only purpose is to “fix” Audrey. He’s only there to kiss her and tell her to talk to random people and congratulations, she’s cured.
I really don’t understand why people like this book…. Not only is it terrible representation, it’s just not interesting and the writing is bland. Yes, this is just my opinion and you can like what you like but why?
So yeah. I wish I never read this book. Even though I understand that this book is unrealistic and wrong, it really pains me that a lot of people younger than me will go into this book expecting representation and a form of hope and come out with 1) an unrealistic expectation that one person can cure you 2) an even more unrealistic expectation that recovery will be fast and seamless.
This is just so so wrong. 1) Romance is already so toxic in a lot of media forms and the idea that a romantic interest (in this case, like most cases, a man) can fix something as ingrained as anxiety is a terrifying and damaging idea to be perpetuating to young girls. 2) Anxiety, like all mental illness, is life long struggle and it doesn’t just go away. Our anxieties will always be there, they are a part of life but as we recover, we learn how to deal with our anxieties more and I wish YA authors understood this better. Just once I want a book about a realistic recovery. I want to read about a character learning how to live their best life and learning ways to deal with their mental illness in healthy and careful ways… I don’t want to read about someone being fixed by some dude. I want them to learn how to help themselves and in turn help readers learn to help themselves.
Okay, objectively I know that I’ve read much worse books. The writing and plot of this book are not the worst I’ve ever read and it’s readable unlike some other books I’ve read but I didn’t hate those as much as I hate this. I hate this book. And yes, I know hate is a strong word and I shouldn’t waste my energy on hating a book when that energy could go to reading books that I will end up loving but this book hurt me. This book offended me so deeply and there’s no other word to use. I hate it. I hate the way it’s made me feel.
Finding Audrey is about a girl who is so crippled by her anxiety that she can’t leave her house. She hasn’t been to school in months because of extenuating circumstances, hasn’t talked to any of her classmates or friends, can’t even look her family members in the eye… until she meets her brother’s friend, Linus and then she magically gets better…. Or something.
I really thought I was going to relate to this book.
Tragically, I was recommended this book by my therapist, who I was seeing for anxiety…. So, yeah, I was expecting this book to be good rep and hopefully give me some sort of comfort and a story to look to for hope when my anxiety got the best of me. I didn’t get that. This book is a sorry excuse for representation and I can not believe how atrociously the author handled this topic.
I think it goes without saying that the ‘boy fixes girl’ trope is over done and highly problematic and just unrealistic. Not to mention in this book it makes absolutely no sense. It all happens so fast; you can’t even call what Audrey goes through development. The plot progression is stilted and the character development suffers because of it. For example, one minute, Audrey can’t talk to Linus at all, doesn’t want him in the house and has to write notes in order to speak to him and the next they’re making out. I’m not joking, on the same exact page she can’t look at him and then one paragraph later they are swapping spit. Or, she can’t leave the house and then she’s going to Starbucks. Granted she does panic over this. The whole way to Starbucks she’s panicking and then we get to Starbucks and she can easily talk to the barista without so much as a batted eye…. I don’t get it. Or even better, Linus tells her to go talk to random people at Starbucks and she just does it…? And then feels better afterwards and can do it again and again. I’m sorry but that’s not how anxiety works. Just because you manage to do something that causes you anxiety once doesn’t mean the anxiety goes away the next time you try to do it… it’s always there and portraying it as this thing that can be so easily overcome is really insensitive.
Not to mention, we don’t get to know Linus at all. I’m not kidding, I couldn’t even tell you if he has any siblings. All we know is that he plays video games and he’s Audrey’s brothers friend. His literal only purpose is to “fix” Audrey. He’s only there to kiss her and tell her to talk to random people and congratulations, she’s cured.
I really don’t understand why people like this book…. Not only is it terrible representation, it’s just not interesting and the writing is bland. Yes, this is just my opinion and you can like what you like but why?
So yeah. I wish I never read this book. Even though I understand that this book is unrealistic and wrong, it really pains me that a lot of people younger than me will go into this book expecting representation and a form of hope and come out with 1) an unrealistic expectation that one person can cure you 2) an even more unrealistic expectation that recovery will be fast and seamless.
This is just so so wrong. 1) Romance is already so toxic in a lot of media forms and the idea that a romantic interest (in this case, like most cases, a man) can fix something as ingrained as anxiety is a terrifying and damaging idea to be perpetuating to young girls. 2) Anxiety, like all mental illness, is life long struggle and it doesn’t just go away. Our anxieties will always be there, they are a part of life but as we recover, we learn how to deal with our anxieties more and I wish YA authors understood this better. Just once I want a book about a realistic recovery. I want to read about a character learning how to live their best life and learning ways to deal with their mental illness in healthy and careful ways… I don’t want to read about someone being fixed by some dude. I want them to learn how to help themselves and in turn help readers learn to help themselves.