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A review by jon_o88
The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien
4.0
4 ⭐
Hobbit Review No.345,000,029 in D Major [1.Tolkien Dedication] as performed by the Oakenshield Orchestra and the Rivendell Children’s Choir:
“It matters not what one thinks of ‘The Hobbit’.
Another review? Dios mio, please stop it!
Everything now is pre or post-Tolkien,
Don’t act so shocked, Macaulay Culkin!
Negative reviews are fake news says ‘The Donald’,
John's given kids more joy than Ronald McDonald!
Ya Hey! Ya-Harri-Hey! Ya hoy!
Goblins, Wizards, Elves; oh boy, what a joy!
Tolkien’s the pillar that all other’s stand on,
There’s not a trope, good or bad, that hasn’t his stamp on.
I’ve heard it expressed as a general Reuel,
Most authors don’t equate to Tolkien’s Bristol stool.
Tra-la-la-lally! Fa-la-la-lally! Fa-la!
This wily motherfucker really set the bar!
So, thank you, Mr.Tolkien, for your contribution to the genre,
I’m having an old friend for dinner, that’s a double entendre.
It’s clear by now that I’m no poet,
I’ve exposed myself! Now everyone will know it!
So goodbye for now, adios y au revoir,
I’m off to spend an evening in Galadriel’s boudoir
May your beard grow longer
and your virility stronger,
May a thrush land upon your shoulder,
May you live to be a great deal older.
Break it down now!
I said a hib-hob, the Hobbit, the Hobbit
To the hib, hib-hob you don’t stop the rockin’….” [Fade out]
Hobbit Review No.345,000,029 in D Major [1.Tolkien Dedication] as performed by the Oakenshield Orchestra and the Rivendell Children’s Choir:
“It matters not what one thinks of ‘The Hobbit’.
Another review? Dios mio, please stop it!
Everything now is pre or post-Tolkien,
Don’t act so shocked, Macaulay Culkin!
Negative reviews are fake news says ‘The Donald’,
John's given kids more joy than Ronald McDonald!
Ya Hey! Ya-Harri-Hey! Ya hoy!
Goblins, Wizards, Elves; oh boy, what a joy!
Tolkien’s the pillar that all other’s stand on,
There’s not a trope, good or bad, that hasn’t his stamp on.
I’ve heard it expressed as a general Reuel,
Most authors don’t equate to Tolkien’s Bristol stool.
Tra-la-la-lally! Fa-la-la-lally! Fa-la!
This wily motherfucker really set the bar!
So, thank you, Mr.Tolkien, for your contribution to the genre,
I’m having an old friend for dinner, that’s a double entendre.
It’s clear by now that I’m no poet,
I’ve exposed myself! Now everyone will know it!
So goodbye for now, adios y au revoir,
I’m off to spend an evening in Galadriel’s boudoir
May your beard grow longer
and your virility stronger,
May a thrush land upon your shoulder,
May you live to be a great deal older.
Break it down now!
I said a hib-hob, the Hobbit, the Hobbit
To the hib, hib-hob you don’t stop the rockin’….” [Fade out]