A review by meganmilks
Live Through This: On Creativity and Self-Destruction by Sabrina Chap
5.0
i've owned this book for a long time but resisted reading it; was reluctant to enter this kind of emotional space. then eileen myles read her essay that's in here (which is worth the cost, really) when she read in chicago, but i still couldn't bring myself to touch it. then i met the editor (whose stage name is sabrina chap) when we both performed at sappho's salon, at a time when i was finally allowing myself to enter this space again with my own writing, so i took the book off the shelf, and wham. it hits hard and good.
these essays get away from stereotypical ideas about creativity, artistry, self-destructive behavior, the Mad Artist, etc. the writers collected here rarely tango with therapy-speak and many view their past behaviors as important and necessary to who they are now, never disavowing or regretting or shaming their former (or present) selves. as sabrina writes in her intro: "We have been taught that self-destruction is an awful thing. "It is bad," we've been told by therapists, psychologists, and those who do not understand its seduction. I would like to edit that. Instead of "it is bad," I would like for it to read, "It is." It is what we do naturally. We smoke too much, we drink too much, we drive sobbing in the rain. Our hearts break and we do not eat. At times we drink to forget, and at times, we forget for years."
the subtitle doesn't announce it, but this is a collection largely addressing female/feminine creativity and self-destruction (there are trans voices included). its emphasis is on creativity, on the ways in which these artists have channeled their self-destructive tendencies into art. not oh, madness is required for art; not even that they are intrinsically connected; but hey, look - see how power can be directed away from self-abuse and towards something that can last. what is so powerful about this collection is reading these pieces often about the worst of times, often about tough shit or about how these people dealt with their tough shit, are still dealing with it, and then you read their bios, all of their amazing accomplishments, and you feel so proud.
these essays get away from stereotypical ideas about creativity, artistry, self-destructive behavior, the Mad Artist, etc. the writers collected here rarely tango with therapy-speak and many view their past behaviors as important and necessary to who they are now, never disavowing or regretting or shaming their former (or present) selves. as sabrina writes in her intro: "We have been taught that self-destruction is an awful thing. "It is bad," we've been told by therapists, psychologists, and those who do not understand its seduction. I would like to edit that. Instead of "it is bad," I would like for it to read, "It is." It is what we do naturally. We smoke too much, we drink too much, we drive sobbing in the rain. Our hearts break and we do not eat. At times we drink to forget, and at times, we forget for years."
the subtitle doesn't announce it, but this is a collection largely addressing female/feminine creativity and self-destruction (there are trans voices included). its emphasis is on creativity, on the ways in which these artists have channeled their self-destructive tendencies into art. not oh, madness is required for art; not even that they are intrinsically connected; but hey, look - see how power can be directed away from self-abuse and towards something that can last. what is so powerful about this collection is reading these pieces often about the worst of times, often about tough shit or about how these people dealt with their tough shit, are still dealing with it, and then you read their bios, all of their amazing accomplishments, and you feel so proud.