A review by lingfish7
You're the Only One I've Told: The Stories Behind Abortion by Meera Shah

emotional informative reflective medium-paced

5.0

📖🎧This book was probably the most educational and informative nonfiction I’ve read this year. If you want to understand the abortion issue more and apply empathy to real people, this is a great resource. The author covers a different person in each chapter and their story of getting pregnant and ultimately making the decision to end the pregnancy via abortion. There is someone in every age group, racial and cultural identity, socioeconomic background, and religion. The author, who is an abortion provider, really covers her ground sharing stories that emphasize people and complexity of this issue. The stories included range from the 1980’s to present day.

I grew up in a conservative home where I was taught that being pro life meant saving babies and pro choice meant murdering babies. There was no other discussion on the matter, no empathy for the mothers who feel they cannot have the baby. It was such a simple worldview. But life isn’t that black and white. The reason the abortion issue is so controversial is because it’s filled with immense nuance. I think the turning point for me in the past 5 years has been acknowledging the hypocrisy of being “pro-life” while also withholding birth control, sex education, and childcare from these women.  Does the pro life side care more about an unborn fetus than a woman whose life is at risk by her pregnancy? Or more about the fetus than, say, the health and livelihood of that baby out of the womb? 

My own worldview has shifted drastically since 2016 and I can say that this book found me at the perfect time. I’m so glad that Dr. Shah took the time to write down these stories and engage in the conversation with empathy and compassion. I can say from my prior experience reading pro-life Christian books, they ironically have a complete lack of empathy and compassion. They tend to condemn the women that would choose to “kill their own babies” and demonize anyone who would stand for reproductive rights. But I wish I knew the “other side” sooner. I wish I had taken the time years ago to put my biases and background aside, and understand on a deeper level. 

I won’t go into more detail, because I would probably end up writing an essay instead. Read this book if you want to go deeper. Read it if you want to become more open minded about the world and its complexity.
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