A review by raechel
The Terror by Dan Simmons
adventurous
dark
mysterious
tense
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
3.0
I'm so mad at this book. I'm writing this review and genuinely don't know how to rate it.
The doomed Franklin expedition is my hyperfixation. I love a good maritime disaster and horror is my favorite genre. This should have been the perfect storm for me. And.. sometimes it is. And sometimes it isn't.
<b>The good:</b> It's very clear that Simmons spent a long time researching the Franklin expedition and took a lot of care to weave in the real men on board and learn some of their histories. I learned a lot about ships and different words for ice formations just how unrelenting and unforgiving the cold can be. I loved reading how Simmons included real facts about the expedition into the story. Reading the addition to the note in the cairn was so interesting.
Some reviewers have expressed the idea that they think this book is too long. It's definitely a doorstopper, and while I usually don't read books this long, I think a story like this HAS to be a bit of a slog. It's like a reflection of the endless dark and the years on the ice and the uncaring north. All you can do is continue on. Then you get these amazing moments of the monster, the terror (not the ship) attacking and <i>taunting</i> these men. There's an intelligence to this beast and it's horrifying.
<b>The bad:</b> Where do I start. With the treatment of women? Of which we see, technically, three. But one doesn't really count because she's old. The most we hear about women are the two teenage native girls and their big ol' sweaty boobies.
That's right everyone, one of the women (who literally can't speak because why would she need to) is constantly getting her (often) bare breasts oogled by these men on the ship. Lady Silence is always lounging around on furs with them gazongas just hanging out. And she lets you! It's totally cool. And, as many characters point out, you can't tell how old these native girls are anyway so it's probably fine. And according to Franklin's inner dialog, these treacherous native women are always trying to steer these good British men astray with their evil sexuality. It's not because these literal teenage girls may feel they HAVE to align themselves with one man when literally dozens of armed white men show up.
The other (teenage) native girl we see? Her name is Boobs. Sorry, that was crude. I mean, her name is Big Tits. And just to make sure we know that's her name, a dude pulls her jacket up so we can all see them jubblies bouncing around in the cold air. What a cool author Simmons is to talk about teenage girl boobs every other chapter in this behemoth book. Literally in the SECOND TO LAST PAGE of the novel we hear that Miss Big Tits and her parka puppies are doing just fine. Thank god.
Also, Lady Silence, she of the Sweaty Boobs Who Also Sexes Up A Snow Monster, is totally into this 50+ year old white man and does the dirty with him. She doesn't care that he hasn't bathed in years and has scurvy and doesn't speak her language. She's down to sex up an old white dude and this totally isn't Dan Simmons writing in some wishful thinking.
What else is bad... well, we have two gay couples. That's progress right? Except one gay could are the Evil Gays, you know because they have gay sex. The other gay couple are the Good Gays because they don't have sex as that's against the rules. It's definitely not a reflection of Dan Simmons. Now let's get back to "accidentally" walking in on topless teenage girls lounging around, amirite guys??
Hahahaha I still don't know how to rate this book. Why do authors do this. 5 Stars for the historical horror, 1 star for anything else in this book.
The doomed Franklin expedition is my hyperfixation. I love a good maritime disaster and horror is my favorite genre. This should have been the perfect storm for me. And.. sometimes it is. And sometimes it isn't.
<b>The good:</b> It's very clear that Simmons spent a long time researching the Franklin expedition and took a lot of care to weave in the real men on board and learn some of their histories. I learned a lot about ships and different words for ice formations just how unrelenting and unforgiving the cold can be. I loved reading how Simmons included real facts about the expedition into the story. Reading the addition to the note in the cairn was so interesting.
Some reviewers have expressed the idea that they think this book is too long. It's definitely a doorstopper, and while I usually don't read books this long, I think a story like this HAS to be a bit of a slog. It's like a reflection of the endless dark and the years on the ice and the uncaring north. All you can do is continue on. Then you get these amazing moments of the monster, the terror (not the ship) attacking and <i>taunting</i> these men. There's an intelligence to this beast and it's horrifying.
<b>The bad:</b> Where do I start. With the treatment of women? Of which we see, technically, three. But one doesn't really count because she's old. The most we hear about women are the two teenage native girls and their big ol' sweaty boobies.
That's right everyone, one of the women (who literally can't speak because why would she need to) is constantly getting her (often) bare breasts oogled by these men on the ship. Lady Silence is always lounging around on furs with them gazongas just hanging out. And she lets you! It's totally cool. And, as many characters point out, you can't tell how old these native girls are anyway so it's probably fine. And according to Franklin's inner dialog, these treacherous native women are always trying to steer these good British men astray with their evil sexuality. It's not because these literal teenage girls may feel they HAVE to align themselves with one man when literally dozens of armed white men show up.
The other (teenage) native girl we see? Her name is Boobs. Sorry, that was crude. I mean, her name is Big Tits. And just to make sure we know that's her name, a dude pulls her jacket up so we can all see them jubblies bouncing around in the cold air. What a cool author Simmons is to talk about teenage girl boobs every other chapter in this behemoth book. Literally in the SECOND TO LAST PAGE of the novel we hear that Miss Big Tits and her parka puppies are doing just fine. Thank god.
Also, Lady Silence, she of the Sweaty Boobs Who Also Sexes Up A Snow Monster, is totally into this 50+ year old white man and does the dirty with him. She doesn't care that he hasn't bathed in years and has scurvy and doesn't speak her language. She's down to sex up an old white dude and this totally isn't Dan Simmons writing in some wishful thinking.
What else is bad... well, we have two gay couples. That's progress right? Except one gay could are the Evil Gays, you know because they have gay sex. The other gay couple are the Good Gays because they don't have sex as that's against the rules. It's definitely not a reflection of Dan Simmons. Now let's get back to "accidentally" walking in on topless teenage girls lounging around, amirite guys??
Hahahaha I still don't know how to rate this book. Why do authors do this. 5 Stars for the historical horror, 1 star for anything else in this book.