A review by daniandsn
Forager: Field Notes for Surviving a Family Cult by Michelle Dowd

challenging dark emotional reflective sad fast-paced

4.75

As I eat from the earth, I consecrate what I devour, because there is still some wild left in me, and even darkness can be a gift. We are made of recovery

Stunning in writing, Michelle tells the story of how she grew up and escaped from her family cult. This story is harrowing, challenging, but told in breathtaking detail. We follow the inner thoughts of her as an intelligent young girl trying to make sense of the world around her that tells her children and women alike are not meant to be heard, special, or have opinions of their own. Neglected by even her own mother, who refuses to get too attached to any of her children in case God asks her to sacrifice them, Michelle instead is cared for by the Mountain and its sustaining plants.

Forager is about the trials of abuse Michelle faced as a child, as well as a story of her coming to terms with what it means to be a woman, and the fear that is attached to it in a hyper-patriarical religious cult. 
She tells me I am growing up, that I am becoming a woman. And then she tucks me into bed, like I am a little girl.

It is also the story of trying and failing to control and understand her own body, through diet, connection to the mountain, or having moments where she dissacociates to protect herself. 
We don't bring water, not because Dad wants us to learn to find it within the plants, but because he wants us to suffer the pains of thirst and be humbled, to know only the Lord our God can save us.

I did wish the book went into more details about her escape and living off of the land. Parts of it felt rushed, a chapter sometimes jumping ahead years. 

I would absolutely read more by this author. She has a beautiful writing voice and told a deeply vulnerable story about pain and resilience. 
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