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A review by jenna_x_w
What Doesn't Kill You: A Life with Chronic Illness - Lessons from a Body in Revolt by Tessa Miller
5.0
I didn’t want the year to end without saying a few words about this one, which made my top 10 nonfiction of the year in a very strong nonfiction year.
Look, I work in mental health, as some of you know. Currently, a significant portion of my work relates to chronic illness and grief and loss. (After these past two years especially - everyone’s work in mental health does.)
As a result, I am always searching for good own-voices memoirs by survivors of chronic illness. They are proliferating lately, which is a good thing, because so is chronic illness and its poor misunderstanding and treatment, especially in women. Problem is, it’s been hard to find good memoirs I can recommend.
This one is my favorite so far. I know a nonfiction book is good when I acquire both the audio and the hard copy so I can almost always be reading it. Both versions are great and the audio is read by the author, who seems crazy talented. She’s a lovely, talented person and a great writer and reader.
Here are just a few things I like about it:
1. It’s super honest and descriptive, which is surely not easy when you’re talking about gastrointestinal chronic illness especially. But it’s super important - easily well over half of my clients at any given time are suffering from ailments of this system. Easily. And they are embarrassed and confused and silenced and dismissed.
2. The personal is political - and the author really goes beyond her personal story to get at the many larger systemic and institutional issues that obstruct effectively addressing chronic illness. She is a powerful voice and advocate.
3. One problem I have had with books of this type is that the author throws in a full autobiography. I mean, life is important and interesting and all, but not every detail and experience and event is relevant to the big story being told. This author strikes that balance exactly right. When she incorporates other autobiographical detail, it illuminates the larger theme of the book - for example, shedding light on risk factors for or impacts of illness, including other prevalent public health concerns like domestic violence and abuse.
4. In addition to self-advocacy tips for chronic illness survivors, she includes an awesome chapter with tips for loved ones and allies. One of the most disheartening things about working with survivors is learning how awful and unsupportive their family and friends and colleagues and providers and partners can be. The stories and direct quotes I hear are sincerely shocking. I mean, it’s hard to be a caregiver, I certainly know, but we can have empathy for that and encourage caregivers to take care of themselves too without being an actual asshole to the person with the actual illness.
5. Miller is always very aware and conscientious of her own privilege and takes care to acknowledge and address power, privilege and equity issues throughout the book, which doesn’t always happen in these types of books. Miller demonstrates awareness that adverse impacts from ability and health privilege status do not negate other privileges from which one may still benefit and others may not.
I’m sure there are other great things about this book that I’m forgetting to mention here, but aren’t these enough? This is a special book and I hope you will read it. Thanks so much to Miller for bravely and professionally writing it.
Look, I work in mental health, as some of you know. Currently, a significant portion of my work relates to chronic illness and grief and loss. (After these past two years especially - everyone’s work in mental health does.)
As a result, I am always searching for good own-voices memoirs by survivors of chronic illness. They are proliferating lately, which is a good thing, because so is chronic illness and its poor misunderstanding and treatment, especially in women. Problem is, it’s been hard to find good memoirs I can recommend.
This one is my favorite so far. I know a nonfiction book is good when I acquire both the audio and the hard copy so I can almost always be reading it. Both versions are great and the audio is read by the author, who seems crazy talented. She’s a lovely, talented person and a great writer and reader.
Here are just a few things I like about it:
1. It’s super honest and descriptive, which is surely not easy when you’re talking about gastrointestinal chronic illness especially. But it’s super important - easily well over half of my clients at any given time are suffering from ailments of this system. Easily. And they are embarrassed and confused and silenced and dismissed.
2. The personal is political - and the author really goes beyond her personal story to get at the many larger systemic and institutional issues that obstruct effectively addressing chronic illness. She is a powerful voice and advocate.
3. One problem I have had with books of this type is that the author throws in a full autobiography. I mean, life is important and interesting and all, but not every detail and experience and event is relevant to the big story being told. This author strikes that balance exactly right. When she incorporates other autobiographical detail, it illuminates the larger theme of the book - for example, shedding light on risk factors for or impacts of illness, including other prevalent public health concerns like domestic violence and abuse.
4. In addition to self-advocacy tips for chronic illness survivors, she includes an awesome chapter with tips for loved ones and allies. One of the most disheartening things about working with survivors is learning how awful and unsupportive their family and friends and colleagues and providers and partners can be. The stories and direct quotes I hear are sincerely shocking. I mean, it’s hard to be a caregiver, I certainly know, but we can have empathy for that and encourage caregivers to take care of themselves too without being an actual asshole to the person with the actual illness.
5. Miller is always very aware and conscientious of her own privilege and takes care to acknowledge and address power, privilege and equity issues throughout the book, which doesn’t always happen in these types of books. Miller demonstrates awareness that adverse impacts from ability and health privilege status do not negate other privileges from which one may still benefit and others may not.
I’m sure there are other great things about this book that I’m forgetting to mention here, but aren’t these enough? This is a special book and I hope you will read it. Thanks so much to Miller for bravely and professionally writing it.