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A review by carnageinterlude
If I Can't Have You by Charlotte Levin
dark
mysterious
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
My first thought I have to verbalise while writing this review: HOW can a novel this good be a debut???
If I Can't Have You is a novel I picked up following Constance Little, a receptionist at a doctor's practice in London. Aside from the gripping introduction in this epistolary novel where we meet our Constance, clad in blood, vodka and taffeta, the story begins after the death of one of the doctor's, introducing Dr Samuel Stevens. Through Constance's rose-tinted glasses, Samuel seems idyllic, but Ms Levin takes us on a dizzying journey that rips apart our preconceived ideas about these characters.
Despite how twisted Constance is as a character, her backstory allows readers to sympathise somewhat; shrouded in extreme guilt she feels for the loss of both parental figures in her life and such loneliness, I can understand why she latches on to a near stranger who offers her cheap sex. In fact, Levin's epistolary style gives an insight into every detail of her emotions spiralling into an obsession which is part of what allowed me to gel with such a flawed protagonist. Samuel, on the other hand, had the opposite effect on me as I read on. Despite Constance's addiction to him, he is truly mediocre. A womaniser who has no outstanding talent outside of his medical ability, Samuel leads Constance, among other female characters, like donkeys with a carrot on a stick.
The ending came as a huge shock to me. Despite Constance killing the very person she loved after such an emotional climax, she suffers virtually no consequence; however, now Constance seems so much happier, I realised that letting go of Samuel was somewhat symbolic of her letting go of the trauma that she had channelled into him throughout the length of the book. Now she is not alone. She still has Edward and is even pregnant with Samuel's baby which I think is another symbol of her healing from past guilt and trauma of her and her mother's relationship. A fresh start.
This was a truly gripping read and I was hooked from the first page.
If I Can't Have You is a novel I picked up following Constance Little, a receptionist at a doctor's practice in London. Aside from the gripping introduction in this epistolary novel where we meet our Constance, clad in blood, vodka and taffeta, the story begins after the death of one of the doctor's, introducing Dr Samuel Stevens. Through Constance's rose-tinted glasses, Samuel seems idyllic, but Ms Levin takes us on a dizzying journey that rips apart our preconceived ideas about these characters.
Despite how twisted Constance is as a character, her backstory allows readers to sympathise somewhat; shrouded in extreme guilt she feels for the loss of both parental figures in her life and such loneliness, I can understand why she latches on to a near stranger who offers her cheap sex. In fact, Levin's epistolary style gives an insight into every detail of her emotions spiralling into an obsession which is part of what allowed me to gel with such a flawed protagonist. Samuel, on the other hand, had the opposite effect on me as I read on. Despite Constance's addiction to him, he is truly mediocre. A womaniser who has no outstanding talent outside of his medical ability, Samuel leads Constance, among other female characters, like donkeys with a carrot on a stick.
The ending came as a huge shock to me. Despite Constance killing the very person she loved after such an emotional climax, she suffers virtually no consequence; however, now Constance seems so much happier, I realised that letting go of Samuel was somewhat symbolic of her letting go of the trauma that she had channelled into him throughout the length of the book. Now she is not alone. She still has Edward and is even pregnant with Samuel's baby which I think is another symbol of her healing from past guilt and trauma of her and her mother's relationship. A fresh start.
This was a truly gripping read and I was hooked from the first page.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Addiction, Cancer, Death, Sexual assault, Suicide, and Death of parent