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A review by ethne100
What Purpose Did I Serve in Your Life by Marie Calloway
4.0
jesus....
i read this in one sitting at midnight to 3 am at 21 years old which is probably the ideal setting
the hate she was faced with for being raw and open in her writing is.. tiring. the prose is clear and explicit. she doesnt use flowery language or any of that it is short and to the point. she describes in detail her experiences with sex from 18-22 and the complexities and abuse she experiences. i am so grateful to have been blessed to not have the same ..... self destructive or whatever you wish to say streak in myself. i was near tears thinking of how many high school friends i heard speaking through maries words.
i was struck by how fucking young she is here, that feeling when were college aged and trying to prove our knowledge and intelligence while also desperately seeking validation from people who shouldnt want anything to fucking do with people our age. the disgust i feel seeing grown men twice my age excited by my presence. and the power or in my opinion illusion of power young women and teenagers often get from "coopting" mens desire, and how we are truly playing right into their sick twisted fantasies. men in their late 30s posting porngraphy of them with young women, and more women joining in to be part of the """art""". but what other power do you feel you have....... a 40 year old writer with power and a girlfriend having an affair with a girl just now able to go to bars, what the fuck can this man see in her as a kindred spirit, as one of the only people he can relate to. at one point in adrien brody he says
“I know you think you’re weird, but you’re not weird…”
I was touched, but I could tell he was talking to himself, or some projection of himself onto me, rather than me.
the way men project their insecurities their feelings of inadequacy, onto the image the concept the product of a woman.
it is horrific what women live with in this world. her level of self awareness of knowing she is changing to become what they want of her, of knowing she doesnt want what she says she does but wanting the attention the validation the illusion of love and having such a low opinion of herself she believes this is how she can get it.
i think this was an incredible glimpse into the mind of a young woman trying to lead her life the way she wanted to, while becoming increasingly aware of her self destruction, self sabotage, and selfishness.
Wherever marie is now i hope she is choosing what she truly desires. I hope she has friends who care about and support her, that she doesnt feel the burning desperation for support from others and willingness to give whatever they ask/demand of her in order to feel needed.
i read this in one sitting at midnight to 3 am at 21 years old which is probably the ideal setting
the hate she was faced with for being raw and open in her writing is.. tiring. the prose is clear and explicit. she doesnt use flowery language or any of that it is short and to the point. she describes in detail her experiences with sex from 18-22 and the complexities and abuse she experiences. i am so grateful to have been blessed to not have the same ..... self destructive or whatever you wish to say streak in myself. i was near tears thinking of how many high school friends i heard speaking through maries words.
i was struck by how fucking young she is here, that feeling when were college aged and trying to prove our knowledge and intelligence while also desperately seeking validation from people who shouldnt want anything to fucking do with people our age. the disgust i feel seeing grown men twice my age excited by my presence. and the power or in my opinion illusion of power young women and teenagers often get from "coopting" mens desire, and how we are truly playing right into their sick twisted fantasies. men in their late 30s posting porngraphy of them with young women, and more women joining in to be part of the """art""". but what other power do you feel you have....... a 40 year old writer with power and a girlfriend having an affair with a girl just now able to go to bars, what the fuck can this man see in her as a kindred spirit, as one of the only people he can relate to. at one point in adrien brody he says
“I know you think you’re weird, but you’re not weird…”
I was touched, but I could tell he was talking to himself, or some projection of himself onto me, rather than me.
the way men project their insecurities their feelings of inadequacy, onto the image the concept the product of a woman.
it is horrific what women live with in this world. her level of self awareness of knowing she is changing to become what they want of her, of knowing she doesnt want what she says she does but wanting the attention the validation the illusion of love and having such a low opinion of herself she believes this is how she can get it.
i think this was an incredible glimpse into the mind of a young woman trying to lead her life the way she wanted to, while becoming increasingly aware of her self destruction, self sabotage, and selfishness.
Wherever marie is now i hope she is choosing what she truly desires. I hope she has friends who care about and support her, that she doesnt feel the burning desperation for support from others and willingness to give whatever they ask/demand of her in order to feel needed.