A review by kelevrak
But I Love Him, by Amanda Grace
5.0
I think this book, short as it was, was a damn success for one reason, if for no other, and that is that everything felt so damn REAL. The feelings, the absolute overflow of them, wasn't just toward Ann, difficult as her situation was. You felt for Connor, the abuser. His actions are not justified, they're never by any means right. But you do, by the end of it, understand WHY, as sad as that why is. Sadder still, that he cannot move past it, and that it casts this large shadow on something that could have been great, that it took the heart of their relationship and strangled it.
As someone who has been both on the sidelines to an abusive relationship and in an abusive relationship, this struck pretty close to home. And let me tell you, it's so damn accurate.
More than that, I found myself adoring Connor and the complete realness of him. I adored him in a way one might adore a broken toy that once brought such joy, or a sacred belonging that you will simply never part with but should. I adored him in the way I often love watching storms, with awe and longing and sadness, and knowing that he might never be more than a storm. To himself and to others. And it's sad and it left me aching, because while Ann could have walked away from him, written him off as an experience, that is still his shitty life. And it's tragic, that a person can become so dangerous to themselves and to those they love.
This book was all sorts of heartbreaking, and I loved it, and will treasure it.
Five stars well earned.
My heart goes out to those that are able to move past such destructive relationships, as does it go out to those who can't move past the destruction that they themselves are.
As someone who has been both on the sidelines to an abusive relationship and in an abusive relationship, this struck pretty close to home. And let me tell you, it's so damn accurate.
More than that, I found myself adoring Connor and the complete realness of him. I adored him in a way one might adore a broken toy that once brought such joy, or a sacred belonging that you will simply never part with but should. I adored him in the way I often love watching storms, with awe and longing and sadness, and knowing that he might never be more than a storm. To himself and to others. And it's sad and it left me aching, because while Ann could have walked away from him, written him off as an experience, that is still his shitty life. And it's tragic, that a person can become so dangerous to themselves and to those they love.
This book was all sorts of heartbreaking, and I loved it, and will treasure it.
Five stars well earned.
My heart goes out to those that are able to move past such destructive relationships, as does it go out to those who can't move past the destruction that they themselves are.