A review by gabi90
Hiroku by Laura Lascarso
5.0
I haven't read any reviews beforehand, just caught some bits and pieces here and there. And my impression was that Seth was the bad guy who corrupted Hiroku. And that might be true. But perhaps I misjudged the situation a bit. Is he the only one at fault? Who was manipulating who exactly? And when exactly did their relationship started going downhill? Questions like these swarmed my head while I was reading, along with 'why, why, why?'
Half of this book is mostly high school drama. Boy meets boy, they fall in love, there's some conflict... etc.
But even then I was looking for clues, trying to determine if Seth really manipulated Hiroku from the beginning. And maybe he did, but unconsciously, until he must've realized he could actually do that, because it worked. Hiroku loved him that much, that he was blind to it. As they spent even more time together, little bits in Seth's behavior started jumping out at me, but the real game started when Hiroku And it wasn't just Seth who tried to get what he wanted anymore, but Hiroku too. His priorities shifted. I think at that point he wasn't even in love with Seth anymore. Not like Before. Seth's betrayal destroyed the trust Hiroku had in him. And once their promises were broken, that trust could not be regained.
But there was an unexpected development, and Seth's behavior might've made more sense. It doesn't justify his actions, but made it harder to actually hate him. (That is, until I reached the end. Coward!) I only read one book where the MC had. I haven't looked it up, but what I gathered from that one book is basically that they experience the highest highs and the lowest lows to the point where it gets life-threateningly dangerous. And since Seth didn't take medication, at least not prescribed meds, I wonder how much of his behavior could be blamed on his condition, cause he showed some manic behaviour.
Also I'm so frustrated. The MC's are still teenagers, and I just can't believe something like this could happen at their age. But just because they're young doesn't mean they're not capable of cruelty, abuse or manipulation, they just need the right (or wrong) motivation for it. And this isn't even the first book where I encountered such things, but it baffles me.
There are 2 timelines: 'Then' and 'Now', so in the beginning we already know the end result, but that just makes it more interesting. Knowing what happened but not knowing how they got there. It's weird because I have some experience with this scenario, and didn’t like it, but the chapters where Hiroku talks about his current situation were very short and didn't tell us much fact, mostly just his feelings.
It kind of felt like I was reading Hiroku's memoir, like he was trying to tell me, to make me understand how he got to this point.
The ending was pretty intense. And now I'm on to The Bravest Thing, though I'm not sure how much this boy can take.
“Who was right and who was wrong? It’d be so easy to make Seth the villain and me the victim, and place all the blame on his shoulders, but I’m not innocent. I knew what I was doing. I was mean too. And spiteful. Sometimes, I baited him. I definitely punished him."
Half of this book is mostly high school drama. Boy meets boy, they fall in love, there's some conflict... etc.
“This is the beginning of something remarkable.”
But even then I was looking for clues, trying to determine if Seth really manipulated Hiroku from the beginning. And maybe he did, but unconsciously, until he must've realized he could actually do that, because it worked. Hiroku loved him that much, that he was blind to it. As they spent even more time together, little bits in Seth's behavior started jumping out at me, but the real game started when Hiroku
Spoiler
started using too. And by the way, I'm not sure how accurate was it, when after just one time, Hiroku started craving the drugs. I don't have any experience with substance abuse, but to me his addiction developed too fast, considering he only used painkillers that first time, and not actual drugs.“Had I not given him everything he wanted? Was I not desirable, clever, available…enough for him? That was the only conclusion I could draw. All roads pointed to me not being enough.”
But there was an unexpected development, and Seth's behavior might've made more sense. It doesn't justify his actions, but made it harder to actually hate him. (That is, until I reached the end. Coward!) I only read one book where the MC had
Spoiler
bipolar disorder“What more do you want from me, Seth?”
“I want to put you in a cage, and only let you out to be with me.”
His pretty, little bird in a gilded cage. He may not have said it so plainly before, but it was something I’d always sensed: his obsessive demand for total dominion of my mind, body, and spirit.”
“It will never be over between us, Hiroku. Our souls are forever bound. When I call for you, you come to me. I made you—every single piece of you belongs to me—and however hard you try, you will never be rid of me.”
Also I'm so frustrated. The MC's are still teenagers, and I just can't believe something like this could happen at their age. But just because they're young doesn't mean they're not capable of cruelty, abuse or manipulation, they just need the right (or wrong) motivation for it. And this isn't even the first book where I encountered such things, but it baffles me.
There are 2 timelines: 'Then' and 'Now', so in the beginning we already know the end result, but that just makes it more interesting. Knowing what happened but not knowing how they got there. It's weird because I have some experience with this scenario, and didn’t like it, but the chapters where Hiroku talks about his current situation were very short and didn't tell us much fact, mostly just his feelings.
It kind of felt like I was reading Hiroku's memoir, like he was trying to tell me, to make me understand how he got to this point.
“The things we once gave freely to each other became the things we withheld until it was just a ledger of what was owed.”
The ending was pretty intense. And now I'm on to The Bravest Thing, though I'm not sure how much this boy can take.