A review by khouris_pov
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson

emotional informative reflective medium-paced

5.0

This is one of the best psychology books I’ve read! 

This book made me reflect about how I interact and show up around my family. Growing up around emotionally immature adults (not just parents but also people in my immediate and extended family). I realize that I am not myself when I am around them, my true self that my friends and my chosen family know doesn’t feel safe to come out because of past ridicule and shame I got. It’s honestly so annoying and disheartening knowing you can’t show up as your full self, but this book helped me realize a lot. What does it look like to engage with someone and know that their maturity level is what it is and understanding while that person is how they are, that doesn’t reflect me and it doesn’t reflect how I show up in relation to them. 

I have so many thoughts on this book that this review will most likely turn into pages of pages into my journal lol. But if you are struggling with emotionally immature parents, siblings, grandparents, adults, romantic partners, etc., please get this book. It illuminated a lot and it definitely was painful knowing the truth but it also felt like a weight was lifted because it’s not really my weight to carry. And it really has some practical advice for me as a child on what to do about my behavior that has resulted from my upbringing. But this is a part that I battle with because the trauma that I dealt with as a child is unfortunately something I still deal with and experience today. It’s hard being an environment that you know triggers you while also trying to be and do better. But this is a part of doing the work (for myself at least lol). 

I also appreciate how the book closes out with showing us what emotionally mature people look like and how to move forward with seeking emotionally mature relationships! Overall I would definitely recommend this book, make you have pens, highlighters, and lil post it notes because I annotated this book like no other!