A review by onestepforward
The Wall of Winnipeg and Me by Mariana Zapata
The first time I read this book, I read it very quickly, not quite a one-day read, but nearly so. I enjoy the romance, and I did like it again the second time.
What bothers me about this book is the way Vanessa discusses her mother and sisters as well as the effects of addiction and familial trauma.
Vanessa is a more emotionally stable person who thankfully did not develop any substance addiction. In the same sense that Aiden doesn't talk to his parents, Vanessa has no obligation to ever talk to her sisters or even her mother, but I can't ignore how Mariana Zapata seemed to dismiss the effects of addiction and abandonment in the sisters' lives as well. Two people who experience the same abandonment, the same trauma at the hand of the same person, will not be affected the same way.
What bothers me about this book is the way Vanessa discusses her mother and sisters as well as the effects of addiction and familial trauma.
Spoiler
In cases of familial abuse and abandonment, no one is obligated to forgive nor to let those people be part of your life. I fully support Vanessa not wanting to have any sort of relationship with her sisters. However, Vanessa would always talk about how she and Suzy grew up under the "same conditions" and how Suzy had *decided* to be the way that she is. Yes, Suzy most definitely decided to bully Vanessa when they lived together. When Vanessa caught her rummaging for money, she decided to hit Vanessa with that car and leave her there, probably hoping she'd killed her. Vanessa *should not* associate with Suzy unless absolutely necessary. Still, like her, Suzy grew up with an absent mother, most likely never knowing her father, and, unfortunately, with easy access to drugs and alcohol. Vanessa says herself that she knows Suzy is mentally ill. Therefore, it was not Suzy's *choice* to feel abandoned by her mother. She did not choose to be born into this family, just as Vanessa did not choose it. That in no way excuses Suzy's actions, but it does mean that Van shouldn't minimize the trauma all her siblings felt because of their family situation.Vanessa is a more emotionally stable person who thankfully did not develop any substance addiction. In the same sense that Aiden doesn't talk to his parents, Vanessa has no obligation to ever talk to her sisters or even her mother, but I can't ignore how Mariana Zapata seemed to dismiss the effects of addiction and abandonment in the sisters' lives as well. Two people who experience the same abandonment, the same trauma at the hand of the same person, will not be affected the same way.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Physical abuse, Abandonment, Car accident, and Emotional abuse
Minor: Addiction and Panic attacks/disorders